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Organization: Island Xtreme Fighting Date: 13 Mar 2021 City: The Island (17:00 GMT) Arena: Paddy O'Malleys Bar - The Island (700) Big Steven Petitpas back with another Island Xtreme Fighting preview. We can’t talk about IXF II without first commenting on the colossal success that was IXF I. Have you ever, in your unfortunate lives, seen such a positive response to an opening event than what we saw last week at IXF I? No losers to fine anywhere … except the Powaaah family. A horrible setback to their collective Island careers after going 0-an-4 to start things off. Clubber Winger could not be angrier at the way things shook down for his team. But, like the Powaaah family, we’re here to look forward and not dwell on the pass, so let’s get down to business. IXF II 185 lbs Marcus Behnder (4-0) v New Car (3-0) The top two pound-for-pound fighters on the Island square off in this incredible Main Event. Behnder fought just seven days ago at IXFI, earning a surprisingly easy first round submission win over Greek Powaaah while also grabbing submission of the night along the way. To his immense relief, he also survived without getting cut, giving his fragile skin extra time to heal. What’s behind door #1? A New Car! Manager Lucky Lefty may get sick of that lame joke, but this pundit won’t. Car enters IXF after a three-fight QFC warm-up that saw him punch his way to three knockout wins. It could have been worse had he not learned from his first-fight near gaff; 7 head punches connected out of 79 thrown in the clinch, an abysmal and unsustainable ratio. Who will prevail in this battle of the titans? Behnder’s ground game or Car’s standup prowess? Prediction: I’ve loved Behnder since his first fight, but I’m a huge fan of the Price is Right. A New Car wins by TKO as a result of Behnder blood-loss. 135 lbs Draven Maxwell (1-0) v Takeshi Yuudai (3-0) 135 pounders are hard to find these days, but IXF is lucky enough to have two of the best. Draven Maxwell enters IXF after one QFC warm-up, a late second round knockout after unsigned and unwanted Alexander Wilson. It was a good test though as Maxwell quickly found out what worked (clinchwork) and what didn’t (everything else). 8 successful clinches and a perfect 100% strike rate will make any opponent wary. Takeshi "Turbo" Yuudai is a perfect 3-and-0 after three quick submission wins in a week during his QFC tour. The takedown rate has been far from what Yuudai wants, but he’s been aggressive and quick enough to take advantage when he gets there. This will be another contrast in styles. Will the much taller Maxwell be able to keep Yuudai at arms length, or will the 5 footer get in close and take it to the ground? Prediction: If Draven is able to use his reach and keep Turbo away, I think he has a chance to pull of a decision. But I don’t think he can. Yuudai is comically short and Maxwell may have a hard time zeroing in. 155 lbs Helio Nogueira (0-0) v George Russell (1-0) This will be Helio "The Anaconda" Nogueira’s first fight on the Island and IXF is happy to have him onboard. After running through two months of tests with previous fighters, manager Chuck W94 believes he’s found the right recipe with Nogueira, a BJJ artist with some grappling skills. His opponent, George Russell (not the Williams driver), has a nearly exact build with a slightly more proficient wrestling background. Russell is 1-0 after escaping Highland for greener pastures. He won his only fight, a close three round decision that saw him work inefficiently, but hard enough to impress the judges. This could win snore of the night, but a ticket to the top of the division awaits the winner. Prediction: Unless Nogueria makes Russell pay early for a mistake, I can guarantee fans will ask for their money back after this one. But I don’t see it going that way. Russell will overextend, Nogueria will punish. 155 lbs Ricky Luciano (1-0) v Necmettin Hoca (0-0) Ricky Luciano pounded the jesus out of Ginger Johnson in his QFC warm-up, cutting him in the early seconds of the fight and knocking him out cold before Johnson had the chance to take his robe off. Luciano’s defense was also working, avoiding the only two strikes thrown his way. Necmettin Hoca is likely to test Luciano’s big heart a little more, but he comes in as an unknown. His manager is one of the more successful in the business and we don’t expect Hoca to roll over easily. Island creations are an ornery bitch at times and it remains to be seen if Hoca’s wrestling skills are legit. Prediction: Luciano swings and misses and gets cut on the button. Staggered, but still standing, Luciano pulls off a 2nd round knockout. 185 lbs Ache Guarani (0-0) v Wanderlei Nogueira (0-0) I don’t think there’s much doubt that Republica Guarani is the best looking fighter out there. Probably also the strongest, quickest, most well conditioned fighter in the game. He’s also undefeated. Rumors are that his manager has very little idea what he’s doing. This will be the 25 year-old Wanderlei Nogueira’s first bout. The stand-up specialist will look to bang away at Guarani, hoping to find a weakness and avoiding takedown attempts. Prediction: Wanderlei Nogueira makes this one look easy, getting an early first round knockout. 185 lbs Steele Campbell (0-1) v War Path (0-0) Steele Campbell did a one-and-done at Highland and joins IXF after losing his only fight. It was a mixed bag for Campbell; his defense was pretty good, despite being knocked out, and he showed some good footwork staying out of early danger. His offense was sub-par and requires some work if he wants to earn his first win. War Path is an unknown fighter, but rumors at Big Fitness indicate that he’s been working hard on his Muay Thai so we expect a decent stand-up brawl in this one. Prediction: Campbell falls to 0-2 after a nasty knockout 205 lbs Louciano Chaderito (0-0) v Abdul Kadir (0-0) Two new fighters with nearly identical builds will look for their first win in this 205 pound matchup. Both prefer a grappling game and it may come down to strength and desire. Whoever is able to control the ground game should come out on top in this one. Prediction: Kadir adds another win to G Wad's total via 1st round submission. 205 lbs Cannon Fodder (0-0) v King Redbeard (0-0) Two new IXF fighters open up the 205 pound division. Cannon Fodder’s bio reads “very very expendable”, a huge sign of confidence from his team. He could very well be fodder, but we have a little more faith than Billy Arseworth does. King Captain Redbeard hopes to follow in his bearded teammates footsteps (see IXFI) and make manager Chris Karter happy. Similar styles, exact physical builds, we’ll see how this one shapes up. Prediction: Redbeard via decision 265 lbs DeeJay Dawkins (0-0) v Andrey Karaev (0-0) DeeJay "The Decepticon" Dawkins is being billed as a former college star turned cagefighter. The pride of Flint, Michigan has good wrestling skills combined with solid boxing skills. His opponent, the possibly radioactive Andrey Karaev, will see Dawkins’ boxing skills and raise a BJJ skill. We expect the wrestler to prevail, but we’re wrong more times than not. Prediction: Dawkins via decision 170 lbs Durans Helmsfrid (1-0) v Haole Boy (0-0) Two youngsters in the 170 pound division start the show. Durans Helmsfrid won his QFC warm-up with a fairly dominant unanimous decision. The crowd absolutely hated the fight (24% rating). But Helmsfrid doesn’t care about the polls. Haole Boy looks like Bob Marley, but we swear he isn’t. He has slight advantages in boxing and wrestling, but is outclassed if it goes to the mat. Prediction: Haole Boy evens Helmsfrid's record.

Episode IV: Fireproof Thursday March 4th – 1:36PM In a poorly lit backroom of a small, two-bedroom apartment in the Showboat region of Las Vegas, a balding middle-aged man is doing what he does best; sitting in front of the television watching his shows. Tonight is Gold Rush and yeah they may be re-runs, but he watches for the same reason hundreds of thousands of folks migrated to the Klondike to begin with. The rush. Who knows where the next big goldfield was? Would the next pan reveal the huge placer deposit? And if he was being honest with himself, wasn’t part of the interest seeing the disappointment in these idiot’s faces when they found nothing at all? Ah yes, there was more than a little bit of truth in that there nugget wasn’t there? His belly hangs over a pair of well-worn and dirty grey sweatpants, a feature he jokingly tells his wife – sorry, ex-wife – is all baby fat. The only exercise he gets these days is pushing his recliner up and down or changing the channels with the remote. He’s a slob (we’re still being honest here aren’t we?), unemployed and his best days are on the horizon in the rear-view mirror. From the TV - We’ll be back after these important messages … Goddamnit! The camera pans to a couple sitting on a couch. The man has his feet up on the coffee table in front of them, one arm around the woman who is nestled closely against his chest, casually tossing popcorn into her mouth. The man stretches and yawns, biceps and forearms bulging noticeably. Wow, honey you look great. Have you been working out? He laughs. Twice a day, six days a week. You don’t get to look this good by watching TV and eating cheesies. The man wipes his cheesie fingers on his sweatpants. Sonofabitch. The woman rubs the man’s chest, purring playfully. You’re so hot. She pulls her hand back quickly, concern spreading over her face. Baby, you’re burning up, you’re on fire! The man laughs deeply, holding up his hands, mockingly warding off her compliments. Oh you. No seriously, babe, you’re on fire! The man turns his head and notices flames shooting up from his sleeve. To the woman’s surprise, he laughs again, casually patting the flames until they die out. Don’t worry, baby, this is Carnage Clothing. Carnage? Ya, Carnage Clothing. Just opened right here in Las Vegas, you should check them out. Not only do they have great prices and loads of selections, but they’re made from the best non-flammable material in the world. Watch. He flicks the BBQ lighter and puts the flame to his sleeve. It sparks, catches, and he pats it dead. See? That’s amazing. What’s that name again? Carnage Clothing. A man appears from behind the couch behind the couple. Hi, I’m Punch McDermott, world-class MMA Tycoon fighter, Carnage spokesperson, and part-time volunteer firefighter. Carnage is not just another fly-by-night clothing company offering you flashy designs and gimmicky slogans. Carnage is a lifestyle. It’s like the pin in this hand grenade … The couple on the couch jump up and back away towards the door. A natural reaction to a violent situation. Woa, woa, woa, what the hell, man? Settle down! … leave it in and all you have is a funny looking rock. But pull it out and what do you get? Beautiful and instantaneous Carnage. You! Fat ass on the recliner. M-Me? Yes you. Making excuses for what you’ve become? What? No, I … Longing for better days? Looking for change? I guess … Be the change, fat man. All you have to do is pull the pin. I can do that! Yes you can, fat man, yes you can. Be a better you, be Carnage.

Organization: Island Xtreme Fighting Date: 06 Mar 2021 City: The Island (17:00 GMT) Arena: Paddy O'Malleys Bar - The Island (700) “Big” Steven Petitpas here on the Island for the most anticipated debut of the Island Season. Island Xtreme Fighting, in association with its merchandise partner, Island Xtreme Clothing, is proud to present IXF1 live from Paddy O’Malleys Bar. Let’s get to it! Main Event 170 lbs Greek Powaaah (0-0) v Marcus Behnder (3-0) Headlining IXF1 is 18 year-old Greek Powaah against 25 year old Marcus “I need a Band-Aid” Behnder. We should expect Powaah to stand and exchange and he has a good height advantage to keep Behnder at bay if he chooses. Behnder is 3-0 and after some QFC warm-up’s which saw him dominate on the ground game to earn three submissions in less than four total minutes. If there’s a knock on his game, it’s his paper-thin skin. Greek Powaah has the acumen to take advantage, but does he have the skill to pull it off? Find out on March 6th at IXF 1. 155 lbs Snake Jones (0-0) v Mihail Strutu (1-0) We jump to the 155 pound division for the penultimate fight. A native of Manchester, Snake Jones is an all-round 25 year old fighter looking to dominate the division. He comes into IXF1 as the second-ranked fighter in the division and a win over Strutu could open the door for a title fight. Mihail Strutu joined IXF after a one-fight career in Tortuga Fight. His one and only fight was 21 second, 5-punch knockout of some bum whose been recently retired. Not much of a warm-up for the Romanian, but at least he knows he can throw em down. 205 lbs Johnny Cannons (0-0) v Jin Dredd (0-0) Representing the 205 pound division, Johnny "Warboner" Cannons squares off against Jin Dredd. Cannons is from the famed Chris Karter family and the 25 year old from nearby Nassau told this reporter that he’s not going to let the team down. His mixture of Muay Thai and wrestling prowess will be a tough match for anyone. Jin Dredd disagrees. The 25 year old native of Rio de Janeiro comes into this match already having brown belt in BJJ and fully expects to use this to make Cannons tap. 170 lbs Son Of Dan (0-0) v Brazilian Powaaah (0-0) Another 170 pound matchup featuring two newcomers to the sport. The 25 year old Son of Dan is the stablemate of Jorge Aquino Jr. He started his career later in life, but his corner is hoping the increased life experience will better prepare him for the rigors of the Cage. His opponent is the 2nd of three Powaaah brothers representing manager Clubber Winger. Brazilian gives up 7 years to Son of Dan and 10 pounds, but has a very small reach advantage. On the Island, any advantage could be the difference between glory and defeat. 170 lbs Jorge Aquino Jr (0-0) v Dagestan Powaaah (0-0) Two MMA Tycoon newcomers start off the Main Event card. Jorge Aquino was dropped onto the Island from Stone Mountain, Georgia, and rumors around the locker room are that he’s been working on his ground game. Said a trainer at Cozad’s gym “Aquino? Ya he pays his bills.” Dagestan Powaaah is also working hard at the Island’s Cozad gym and although he’s an Abu Dhabi native, his blood runs deep with Degastanian warrior blood. It will be a contrast in styles for these two 18-year olds; will Degastan use his boxing skills to keep this one upright, or will Aquino Jr sweep him off his feet? Undercard And now, for the undercard! Full of veteran fighters who have stood the test of time… just kidding. It’s the first blood event of the organization and with it will come the first blood of many of its fighters. 205 lbs Rock Brown v Max Strasburg The night will be kicked off by the fight of Rock Brown vs Max Strasburg. This is like the tenth Max Strasburg that has entered the octagon and so far, and well, things had not gone well for his predecessors. And tonight, Max is unlikely to break the name’s curse, given he’s bringing a blue belt against Rock’s brown belt. Since Max wouldn’t hit a sandbag with a punch, he will have to take it to the ground, and then somehow stop getting subbed. Will he succeed? We shall see tomorrow. 265 lbs Louise Chaderito v Marcus Gilliam The second fight of the night will be Louise Chaderito vs Marcus Gilliam. Unlike the previous fight, this won’t be a grappling match. Both fighters are strikers, and while Gilliam is an expert boxer, Chaderito is a muay thai artist. Does Chaderito have any other move than a punch up his sleeve? Unlikely. So, this will be a fun slugfest with Gilliam having a slight edge in skillset, and Chaderito will try to make up for it with motivation alone. The thing is that he’s almost broke, so he needs a win, badly. Will that be enough? I think so. 155 lbs Hells No v Antonio Gomes The next fight is Hells No vs Antonio “Piranha” Gomes. This fight will look as if the fighters have mistaken their sport. Both come with a bjj brown belt, Gomes even sporting a Gi, and it’s unlikely they will do anything other than cuddle. Don’t want to watch adult, almost naked men cuddle? Tough luck, because that’s what you’re getting in this fight. So, who will win? How am I supposed to know that? Do I look like I have a crystal ball? Get off my back. 265 lbs Louis Gingerbeard v Popul Vuh The fourth fight of the night will be Louis Gingerbeard vs Popul Vuh. This one will be entertaining. Vuh will enter the arena in stylish, IXC outfit while Gingerbeard wears the default clothes. Like, really, who does that these days? Anyway, in terms of the fight, Vuh will try to keep this in striking, which he will most likely fail to do. Gingerbeard, on the other hand, has a clean plan in form of engaging in the clinch, maintaining an advantegous position and molesting Vug. And I’m not even talking about the possibility of Gingerbeard pulling guard and breaking Vuh’s arm in a triangle. Even he doesn’t end up attempting that, this will be an uphill battle for Vuh. 170 lbs Steve Cannson v Polish Powaaah And the final fight of the undercard will be Steve "Crawdad" Cannson vs Polish Powaaah. With both of these kids being 18, they look a touch out of place in comparison to the other fighters. But that doesn’t mean their fight will be any less exciting. Ok, nevermind, it does. Powaaaah comes in with excellent boxing and no grappling skills while Cannson is a grappler. If Cannson isn’t too young to know how to shoot for a takedown, he’s got this in the bag. Powaaah will come in fast, hot, get taken down, and then violated on the ground. He’s welcomed to prove me wrong though.

Episode III: Custom Jobs and Vegas Heartthrobs Thursday February 25th – 7:31AM Hyde Park Middle School 900 Hinson St, Las Vegas, NV The three girls faced her in a rough semi circle, closing in with each childish insult thrown. The victim was holding up her book bag in protection, trying to shrink back into the ground as they approached. “What a gorgeous t-shirt …,” mocked the blonde girl in the middle. “Why, thank you,” the victim began, perking up at the unexpected compliment. “… for a pie-eating turd hound!” girl #1 finished, elbowing her neighbour and guffawing. The neighbouring girl took up the torch. “Yes, it’s absolutely stunning …,” The victim clasped her hands against her chest and sighed in relief. “That’s very sweet of you.” “… for a fat stinking billygoat bullyboy!” girl #2 girl screamed, chortling at the look of hurt in the victims eyes. Girl #3 stepped forward, putting a comforting hand on the victims shoulder. “Don’t listen to these girls,” she said soothingly. “I think your wardrobe is just fine …,” The victim smiled, wiping tears from her eyes. “Thank you so much, that means a lot.” “… for a saddle-goosed jelly-belly!” All three girls turned and, linking arms, laughed their way into school. “Tsk-tsk, children can be so cruel,” said a voice behind the victim. She turns, startled at first, then anger passes over her face. “You were standing there the whole time? Why didn’t you say something?” He drinks the rest of his coffee and throws the cup on the ground. “Ahhh, cocoa mochanut. Hi, I’m Punch McDermott, world-class MMA Tycoon fighter, Carnage spokesperson, and part time fashion consultant. Did you know that Carnage now offers their customers custom work?” “Carnage? Where have I heard that before?” “Yes it’s true. Carnage, right here in Las Vegas, is the world’s fastest growing clothing company. It already offers a wide variety of tops like ‘Shall We’, ‘Smash’, and my personal favorite, ‘P1 Green’. But due to unprecedented demand, Carnage is expanding its product line to include custom tops and bottoms.” “Wow, that’s amazing.” A brief look of concern crosses her face and she stares at her feet. “I don’t have much money though, can I afford it?” “No money? No problem. Just go somewhere else to buy your garbage clothes and continue to look like the frumpy, bland, unpopular, unwanted victim of society that you are. Carnage can turn you, yes even you, into a Vegas Heartthrob. Just look at this quality workmanship.” He pulls a top from his bag, proudly showing it to the girl. She looks confused at first and Punch pushes on. “The Fighting Feral Biros? Your school mascot?” “Oh, you mean burro.” “Did you know that they’re the loudest ass in the world and that scientists can’t determine why they smell so bad?” “Interesting.” “They think it may be brain rot.” A small crowd approaches from the direction of the school, gesturing towards Punch and the girl. Girl #3, surrounded by her two minions, pushes to the front of the crowd. “Hey mister, is that your shirt?” “Actually, no. It’s hers,” he says, handing the custom school design to the victim. “Amazing,” says Girl #2. “So chic,” says Girl #1. “You’ll be the envy of everyone, where in the world did you get this and why aren’t we best friends?” says Girl #3. “I…I…,” stumbled the victim. “She came up with the idea herself, brought it to Carnage, who turned it into the glorious masterpiece you see before you.” “Oh dude, you gotta give me one.” Punch waggles his finger, “Ah-ah-ah my eager little beaver. Get your own idea, contact Carnage and you can turn yourself into Vegas’ hottest ticket in one, two, or even three months. With quality like this, no amount of time is too long.”

Episode II: A Child’s Cry Wednesday February 17th – 11:34AM Outside of a daycare centre in Las Vegas, Nevada, a boy is sitting on the stairs, head in hands. Every few seconds his chest heaves, and his tiny little body spasms as if it is trying to shake something loose. A cold perhaps? Covid? Your mind is already turning away from him - should have worn a mask kid - and you feel the briefest bit of shame for being so callous. As you get closer, you hear that that he’s crying. No, not crying, but sobbing. Unfiltered and traumatic, it pierces your heart and you are about to approach when a man sits down next to him, wrapping his big arms around the boy and holding him close. Undefined words of encouragement and reassuring whispers, the boy finally looks up, wiping tears and snot from his face. “Do you want to tell me what happened?” the man (his father you now assume) says softly. One last spasm and the boy sighs deeply. “It was Harmony and Tranquility, they were bullying me again.” The father echoes his son’s sigh. “I fear we’ve done you wrong, son. We’ve always taught you to turn the other cheek, ignore the taunts and the teasing, because the world is full of bullies. Those that think they’re better than you, work in bigger organizations, have stronger backing or more money. They’ll always look down on people like us, those who are willing to work hard to earn what we get. I just don’t know what to do.” Another man, well dressed, smiling and holding a balloon, makes confidence steps towards the pair. Here you go kid, he says as hands the child the balloon. He then turns in your direction. Hi, I’m Punch McDermott, world-class MMA Tycoon fighter, hater of bullies and part time child psychologist. Does this scene look familiar to you? Are you constantly looking over your shoulder and not focusing on what’s in front of you? Ashamed of crying in public and looking for a better life? Hey, that’s not fair, the father says. Don’t be a Harmony, be Carnage! A new clothing store right here in Las Vegas, Carnage is your one-stop shop for all your clothing needs at affordable prices. Run by Dead Disney and approved by thousands, you’ll cause havoc in your new Cypress Skull shirt and GJJ Fighter shorts. With new designs appearing on shelves near you, you’ll never have to turn the other cheek again. Be a better you, be Carnage. Who’s he talking to, Daddy? The father is nodding slowly, wiping his own tears away. All of us, son, all of us.

Happy Valentine's Day to Kazume Kakuei, the proud owner of $50K. Great job with the posts.

KOR 1 Thwack vs Holland (946216) Organization: Kings of Rio (370+) Date: 20 Feb 2021 City: Montreal (14:00 GMT) Arena: Wild Bob's Bar - Montreal (750) We’re less than three weeks away from the biggest fight night in Kings of Rio’s history. It’s been a great start for this up-and-coming organization, pushing out four successful events in January and growing their worldwide fan base. Take those kiddie gloves off folks, because it’s time for the big boys to shine. Main Event For the 185 lb Championship Jahill "Buzzkill" Holland (3-0) v Abak Thwack (2-0) What a great way to come back from a three-week break. The top two ranked fighters in the 185-pound division square off for the Kings of Rio 185 title. Buzzkill Holland hasn’t even had a fight in the organization yet, but his pedigree speaks for itself. A week after storming the capital building, he joined MMA and rolled off three easy QFC wins in less than a week. All three were by KO, the longest lasting less than two rounds. Impressive. Detractors would suggest that he hasn’t proved himself and that his wins were hollow, but undefeated is undefeated. Thwack has spent his entire career with Kings of Rio and is quickly becoming a fan favorite. The Azerbaijani won his opener with a submission at JF1 and followed that up at JF3 with another submission win. The second earned him Sub of the Night, an impressive Americana only 50 seconds into the fight against a solid opponent. It will be a contrast in styles, the stand-up fighter against the submission expert. Thwack has the tendency to cut, which could be disastrous if he can’t stay out of Holland’s reach. For the 145 lb Championship Paulo Lima (4-0) v Dustin "Coconut Bombz" Hernandez (1-0-1) The 145 pound title is on the line in this 5-round feast. As of the release of this article, Paulo Lima is Kings of Rio’s top-ranked fighter. He hasn’t participated in a KoR event, this will be his first, but he stormed to the top of the 145 division with four QFC wins, all via submission. His longest fight was 4:57, his shortest, a mere 44 seconds. Combining a respectable wrestling background, the BJJ brown belt has dominated his opponents with his aggressive offense. A smart opponent could use that against him, is Hernandez that fighter? He won his Kings of Rio opener at JF2 with a devastating combo that knocked his opponent senseless. He toned down his clinchwork after his QFC warm-up, a smart move which shows a willingness to learn and improve. Though his clinch didn’t work as well in his second fight, his punching prowess more than made up for it, landing an amazing 85% of his single shots. Another great contrast in styles. Undercard 265 lbs James Corden (1-1) v Mitch McGregor (2-0) 170 lbs Van Der Ley (1-0) v Wolfgang VonMildenstein (1-0) 265 lbs Melo Dahigh (0-1) v Nikita Koloff (1-1) 145 lbs Yasha Fillipov (1-0) v Jay Jon (0-1) 205 lbs Khabib Smith (1-0) v Choice Gracie (1-1) 135 lbs Juiced Dilly (1-1) v Money Maker (0-1) 170 lbs King The Dragon (0-1) v Stan Marsh (0-1) 265 lbs James Bunda (0-1) v Justin Trudeau (0-0)

Name: Carnage Base: Las Vegas Owner: Dead Disney Episode I: A Valentine's Day Story February 14th, 10:47AM … and as he watched the couple embrace underneath the soft glare of the street lamps, Cupid knew that his arrow had struck true. The old man leans back in his rocker chair, closing the book on his lap. The End Wow Grandpa, says one of the two children sitting in front of him, is that story true? Of course it is, silly, replies the other. That’s how Grandma and Grandpa fell in love. Pffft, booorrrinnggg. I’m talking major zzz’s Grandpa, mocked a man coming out of the shadows. Who goes there? Step out where I can see you. Hi, I’m Punch McDermott, world-class MMA Tycoon fighter, Carnage spokesperson, and part-time Courtois d’amour. Do you kids want to hear another story? Yaaayyyy, they yell in unison. Okay then. Open your ears and steel your heart because this is a true Valentine’s story. He pushes the old man with his foot, motioning him to the floor. Move it Grandpa. But that’s my chair … Let me get glasses and my book out and we’ll start. That looks like a parking ticket, the old man says. Once upon a time, Punch begins … … in an enchanted kingdom far, far away, a young couple walks along the river’s edge. Their fingers are entwined and their faces are warmed by the late-summer’s sun and young love. That’s so romantic, one of the children sighs. The young man leads her to a bench, which he first cleans off, and he motions her to sit. She does, eagerly looking up into his handsome face with adoration. Our love, he begins, is like this river. It flows strong and steady, day after day, never ceasing, growing bigger as it cuts through this fertile land … Sounds like a sexual metaphor to me, pal. A third person, a man judging from the scruffy beard and deep voice, has joined them by the river. I beg pardon, asked the young man. You may, but it probably won’t matter. Where are your pants, asked the young lady. They chafe. Now my little youngsters, you may be wondering why I’m accompanying you on such a fine day. I am here … You have festering wounds, sir, said the young man. … to strike with an arrow. An arrow which will fill you with such uncontrollable desire … You have blood on your lip as well, said the young lady. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Do you want love to conquer all or do you want to sit there and talk about my physique all day? Am I to understand that you are Cupid? Clearly. Now stand still. I’ll just pull this string back and let fly. Steady now. TWANG A blood-curdling scream erupts as the young man’s head disappears in a shower of blood and bits. Cupid lowers his bow. Oh-oh. Wendylin! Oh dear god in heaven, what you have done to my love? Oh my. Call for help, please. Please! Oh my sweet, sweet Wendylin. Stay with me my darling. Part of him is lying over there. CPR. I must do CPR. She begins to do chest compressions. ‘Stayin alive, stayin alive. Ah, ha, ha, ha, stayin' alive, stayin' alive’. He has no head. You’re just squirting blood from his neck. Noooooooooo. Punch takes off his reading glasses, folds his “book” and looks at the children. The End One child is sobbing uncontrollably; the other is holding its knees against its chest and rocking back and forth, muttering incoherently. And that, children, is the true meaning of Valentine’s Day. Some people will tell you that Valentine’s Day is about love and harmony, but did you know it evolved from martyrdom and Carnage? Punch stands from the rocking chair and faces the camera. Yeeessss ladies and gentlemen, Carnage. A new clothing company out of Las Vegas, Nevada, owned and operated by Dead Disney and approved by thousands. It’s the best clothing at affordable prices, but more importantly for you, it’s a philosophy. Are you going to dance through life, conforming to ideas that someone else made up for you? Are you willing to break with the status quo and be a better you? Where there’s conflict and chaos, there’s Carnage, and where there’s Carnage, there’s change. Change for the better, join the movement. And as a special Valentine's Day gift to motivate you, the first five fighters to message Dead Disney and mention this advertisement will receive an amazing $50,000 Carnage sponsorship. One fighter per manager, act now! Offscreen. And cut. That's a wrap. Well, what did you think, Pops? Do you think the message will get through to them? Are you mad? You break into my house, traumatize my grandchildren? And for what, a-a-a damn commercial! Not just a commercial, old man, a message. There's disorder coming and we're starting from the ground up. Listen to the message, learn the lesson.

SSSD 3 (946037) Organization: Super Sydney Square Down Date: 30 Jan 2021 City: Sydney (31 Jan 2021 05:00 GMT) Arena: Paddy O'Malley's - Sydney (700) Rules: MMA Super Sydney Square Down shrunk SSSD 2 and it worked out pretty well for owner, Ssj mrTBE. They nearly sold out the venue, by the slimmest of margins, and we saw great action throughout the night. SSSD 3 moves to 700-seat venue Paddy O’Malley;s and features five fights, most in the 265+ division. Once again, thanks to our sponsor, Sydney Fight Gear, for being the top clothing store in Sydney. Main Event 265+ lbs Vern Vurris (6-0) v Medzavi Nwaoge (2-0) Vurris has the better record, starting his MMAT career with a perfect 6-and-0 record. His opponent’s record is 6-8 so although he’s setting the world on fire, his opponent’s are not. Vurris opened SSSD opener with a first-round submission win over Tall Guy. Guy did his best to keep it off the ground, he was no dummy, but bowed to unrelenting pressure and tapped out at 2:56 of the first round. Shujaa Nwaoge is 2-0 after earning a unanimous decision in his QFC warm-up and an early second round submission at SSSD2. It was a completely different gameplan from his first fight so which one will he show up this time? Whichever it is, Nwaoge is in control of the 265+ division, barely, and a win over Vurris would definitely cement him a number one contender. 265+ lbs Thomas "Funny" Muller (1-0) v Tony Beer (1-0) It’s a tight 265+ division. Thomas Muller is sitting on right on Nwaoge’s heels after a three-round unanimous decision at 3SD’s opener against Ronan Raw. It wasn’t the cleanest of fights for Muller and he had to overcome a poor start to win the final two rounds in order to secure victory. He cut Raw early in the second with a great combo and was able to control the ground game in the latter half of the fight with some good ground and pound. Tony Beer is dropping weight classes after this fight and will give up close to 75 pounds here. His corner doesn’t seem concerned, so why should we? Beer dominated in his opener, a 30 second KO of Bradley Jones, earning him KO of the night. The hometown hero landed all his punches and moves to the top of the 265 division. Undercard 265+ lbs Bradley "The Reaper" Jones (1-1) v Kokkoro Kirin (1-1) Bradley Jones’ star is losing some of its early luster and he’s hoping, like Beer, that moving down in weight will spark some life back into it. He’s 1-1 after splitting his first two and his manager was concerned enough after 3SD’s Opener to move down to his natural weight division of 265. With only days left to his fight against Kirin, his manager also inexplicably moved him back to Sydney, causing a massive drop in his energy level. Does he have enough time to recuperate before his final 265+ fight? Kokkoro Kirin doesn’t care where Jones lives, so long as he shows up for the fight. Sitting mid-way up the 265+ rankings, Kirin fought back to .500 after a first round KO of Splendor Jackson at 3DS’s opener. He was cut early by a vicious leg kick, but steadied himself and punched himself to a win. The cut is worrisome, but if Kirin can display that punching prowess, his corner will live with it. 205 lbs Donald "The President" Trump (2-2) v Clover Cloudhaze (0-0) No it’s not THAT Donald Trump, but his morale is probably at the same level. After two wins in three QFC warm up fights, Trump opened his SSSD career with a close three-round unanimous decision loss. His stand-up game was great, but he had a difficult time adjusting in the clinch, which cost him the fight. Clover Cloudhaze sounds like a weather phenomenon … or a salad. Yes, he’s a salad. 265+ lbs Tall Guy (0-1) v Ronan "Stomp" Raw (0-1) Two fighters looking for their first wins. Tall Guy lost his 3SD debut to Vern Vurris via first round submission. He landed the first two shots of the fight and produced zero offense afterwards, being forced to fend off multiple sub attempts while having his head pounded into the ground. Ronan Raw lost his opener to Thomas Muller, though it wasn’t all bad news. His takedown defense was solid, clinch work was great, but his groundwork was subpar. It will be a fight of contrasting styles, who will come out on top?

Wild Bob's Bar 1800 Blvd Arthur-Sauve Laval, PQ In a small, family-owned bar and grill on the outskirts of Montreal, former MMA Tycoon star and current KoR pundit, Punch McDermott, sits alone at a front table, pushing a piece of fish around his plate with his fork. He brings a small portion up to his nose, takes a sniff, grimaces and reluctantly puts it in his mouth. “Oh that’s just disgusting. Garcon? Garcon!” he snaps his fingers to the waitress, who rolls her eyes and approaches the table. “Oui, monsieur?” Punch pushes his plate towards her. “What is this? This is the worst salmon I’ve ever had.” “That, monsieur, is our house speciality. Salmon Ella. You do not like, monsieur?” “Salmonella? Your house speciality is salmonella?” “Oui monsieur. Salmon Ella, named after the famous jazz singer, Ella Fitzgerald.” “I think I’m going to be sick. Take this away, please.” He shakes his head and turns to the camera. “Hi, I’m Punch McDermott. This place you see around me is a historic place, one which will be featured on CBC’s Heritage Moments advertisements for years to come. No, it’s not for the multiple failed health inspections, or the record number of salmonella cases in 2020; no, Wild Bob’s is going to be a real life Cinderella and Kings of Rio is going to be its fairy godmother. On February 20th, Kings of Rio unleashes violence with its first ever title night. After three straight events that have seen ratings increase, Kings of Rio is now the third-ranked organization in Rio and the second ranked 370K-only company in the world. Unbelievable start, but it gets better. KOR1, taking place right here on February 20th, is going to see not one, but two titles on the line. We’ll talk KOR1 specifics later. For now, let’s talk about Kings of Rio and the future, you and me. The organization will be hosting title nights on a monthly occasion, a place for the elite fighters to shine and something for up-and-comers to strive for. KOR events will be flashier, higher production, brighter limelight and, more importantly, a chance to cement your place in the annals of this organization. Can you do it? Stay tuned, stay active, train hard, earn those dollars and you could be headlining the next KOR event."

Junglefights 4 Organization: Kings of Rio (370+) Date: 30 Jan 2021 City: St Petersburg (21:00 GMT) Arena: The Underground - St Petersburg (1,000) Live on the banks of the Neva River in downtown St. Petersburg, it’s Junglefights 4, brought to you by the good people at Finnish Elite Extreme Science. Buy the products you need with the customer service you deserve at Finnish Elite Extreme Science. It’s an important 10-fight event for KoR members as we start separating the pretenders from the contenders. Let’s get to it. 185 lbs Seth "Clean Cut" Wade (1-0) v Franklin "FuPa" Picard (0-1) Two newcomers to Kings of Rio start the show in the 185-pound division. Seth Wade won his QFC warm-up after a three-round unanimous decision over some takedown bot chump named Michael Bisping. Clean Cut used some decent stand-up striking to frustrate his opponent, forcing Bisping to use up all his energy early, and cruising to the finish line. Franklin Picard lost his QFC warm-up, but it was inevitable against a far superior opponent. He had no defense against the stand-up attack and couldn’t make the clinch-game work. He’ll have to hope the muscle Pro he bought works and works fast. 170 lbs Jorge "Paru" Pereira Pinto (0-1) v William "Snowpiler" Drikus (0-0) Pinto opened up his MMA career at JF1 against good-looking Canadian hero, Benjamin Noeigati. He won the first round using superior takedown skills, but an early-cut caused him to lose focus and his game plan changed from counter fighting to self-preservation. A second round jab opened him up further and he ended up on the wrong end of a KO punch. His opponent at JF4 is a complete unknown. William Drikus stepped onto the scene only two weeks ago, but insiders at the Cozad gym in LA tell us that the South African has been working hard on his stand-up game. Maybe too hard as his energy level has noticeably taken a dive lately. 155 lbs Nelson "Sledger" Maseko (0-1) v Isaac Netero (1-0) Drikus’ stable mate, Nelson Maseko opens his KoR career after losing a tough three-round QFC decision. He was successful on 100% of his takedowns, but was a little schizophrenic after that, standing his opponent back up only to take him back down to the mat a second later. To have any chance at his first win, he’ll have to refine his gameplan against Japanese fighter Isaac Netero. An inexperienced fighter with a very experienced manager, Netero chose to make his debut at the LOM trials about a month ago. He stuffed every takedown attempt his opponent could throw at him and won the one-round-only fight easily. 135 lbs Matthieu Placide (0-0) v Andrei "Orthodox" Petrovic (0-0) Two new MMA fighters with two new managers square off in the 135-pound division. They have similar skill sets and we expect a ground-dominant game. Petrovic does have a significant height advantage here though and he could use it if the Placide gets too aggressive. 135 lbs Fabian Chapelle (0-1) v Ryo Chonen (0-0) The Belgian, Fabian Chapelle, was part of the JF1 undercard and lost a unanimous decision to Tico Tico. It was a decision never in doubt as Chapelle swung and missed his way out of contention early, trying to combo Tico up on every occasion. He’ll have be more selective and find a way to avoid the clinch to earn his first win. Ryo Chonen has been linked to KoR’s owner, but don’t expect him to get a free pass. One of the earliest 370K creations, Chonen is a multi-organization fighter who will look to keep his opponent close. 265 lbs Luke "Punisher" Soza (0-1) v Ray Jones (0-1) Someone will get their first KoR win here, the other will keep free-falling to the bottom of the 265 pound division. Soza was embarrassed at JF1, being hit 211 times in a three-round decision loss to Mitch McGregor. The Punisher was punished from the first bell, defending like a wet tissue and creating zero offense. On a positive note, he put his chin to the test early and it came out on top. Ray Jones lost his first fight at JF2, a late first round submission to James Corden. It was a mixed bag for Jones, who defended well at times, but could create no sustained offense and was always on his back heels. He was also cut early, never a good sign for a stand-up boxer. 145 lbs Jimmy "The Nightmare" Peter (0-0) v Jakub "The Reaper" Dvorak (1-0) Onto the relatively weak 145 pound division for the next fight. Jimmy Peter has no MMA background whatsoever, but it’s rumored that the 25 year old works exclusively on the mat. Knowing the gameplan won’t make it any easier for Dvorak, but he had a good QFC warm-up against a superior opponent, scoring an easy decision. Active, but inaccurate, he’ll look to keep Peter off the ground and hope for the best. 155 lbs Teft "Sarge" Moss (0-0) v Daniel Miocic (1-0) Moss’ manager was one of the most experienced in the game before taking an extended absence. His fighter will try to help him back to the upper echelon in this, his first MMA Tycoon fight. Moss has the wrestling and MT advantage to Miocic, who won his QFC warm-up via first round TKO with a decidedly stronger boxing game. His defense was perfect, his offensive accuracy worth of acknowledgement. It’s a tough opening KoR fight for both fighters, which usually means we’re in for a treat. Main Event 205 lbs Danny "Shaw" Racio (2-0) v Kaladin Storm (0-0) Racio is off to a flying start in his MMA career, heading into this 205-pound matchup with two wins and no losses. He won his QFC warm-up on Christmas Day, a three round unanimous decision using a very strong ground game. He followed that up with an opening KoR win at JF1 against Long Dong by the slimmest of margins; a majority decision. He again used his wrestling and ground game to slow things down and tire his opponent up, something he’s going to have to do again against Kaladin Storm. Unlike his stablemate, Teft Moss, Storm has a clear and superior boxing skills and will be looking to keep this one standing. Will giving up 30 cm’s of height cost him? Will Racio’s self-confidence carry him to a perfect 3-and-0 start? 155 lbs Training "Duh" Dummy (1-0) v Bony "El Búsqueda" Searchinson (1-0) Early 155-pound title contenders, both look to continue their winning ways in Kings of Rio. Dummy won his opener at JF1 after capitalizing on his opponent’s early mistake. The takedown specialist was himself taken down in the first few seconds of the fight and, despite landing in a poor spot, was able to lock in a triangle submission, earning himself the prestigious sub of the night in the process. Bony S also won at JF1, overcoming a slow first round to earn a late second round TKO. He couldn’t find the range for most of the first round, but changed his game late in the first, carrying over some good ground and pound into the second to earn this Main Event spot. Both fighters are good at waiting for opportunities and they’ll have to be patient to find the right opening to pull off a victory at Junglefights 4.

Kings of Rio (370+) (6294) Recruiting Come and join Kings of Rio, the newest and fastest growing 370K organization in the business. Run by Limitless alliance member, Tristan Finch, KoR offers competitive 4-fight introductory contracts, fair and even fights, and plenty of room to grow your fighters. Sky's the limit, join now

Special 3SD Offer Punch Drunk McDermott here. Are you a new MMA Tycoon fighter with no money? A piss-poor manager launder it to support somebody else's career? Can't stop losing at the rigged Bet High Low game? Look no further, your Nigerian Prince is here. The 3SD fighter, current or future, with the best smacktalk, interview, or character build will receive, from my own pockets, $50,000. Yes, it's that easy. Take to the 3SD smacktalk thread, get involved, come up with someone original, real, and meaningful, and I'll transfer your brand new $50,000 to your inbox. Make us laugh, make us cry, make us scared, just don't make it offensive. ** Valid until Valentine's Day, 2021. ** Fine print - offensive includes language, racism, sexism, facism. Your judge will be Mr 3SD himself, Ssj mrTBE. Not applicable in Hawaii or Quebec. Brought to you by the greatest character creation of all time, Punch McDermott.

Should be moved, sorry about that.

Manager 51 23 posts Manager Profile Posted just now Welcome along good friends and neighbors, this is retired MMA fighter, Punch “Drunk” McDermott, live from Frankie’s Diner … It’s Frankie’s Pizza, Punch. Frankie’s Diner, Frankie’s Pizza, Frankie’s f*cking Fine High-Noon Teatime, who cares? It’s a dump. This is what my life has come to now? Former Ashbourne Events Welterweight Champion … That tournament never took place, Punch. … undefeated in the CMMA … Also not true, Punch. Am I that hard up for money? Hellbent still pays me don’t they? That they do, Punch. They’re good people, good people. But we’re here in Koala town this week to talk about Super Sydney Square Down and their new sponsors, Sydney Fight Gear. Owned and operated by Cope T, Sydney Fight Gear is the number one clothing store in Sydney and we here at Super Sydney Square Down cannot thank them enough for sponsoring this organization. Fresh off a mildly successful January 16th opener at the Micro Arena, we return to the same venue for the much anticipated follow-up on January 23rd. SSSD 1 wasn't without its controversies, as the arena was only half-full. Said SSSD owner, Ssj mrTBE, "We expected more, I'm not going to lie. It's always tough to open a new fight organization, especially in this competitive market, but we feel we have the right recipe to make a go. These guys are all new, hungry fighters and if the opening fights are any indication of what to expect, watch out." 3SD - Opener 265+ Vern Vurris vs Tall Guy Vurris came into this fight with an incredible 5-0 record, but manager Mao Xiang downplayed it by pointing to his opponents' combined below-.500 record. Tall Guy wasn't fooled, but couldn't do anything to avoid being taken to the mat in the opening seconds. He did well for a bit, but was overaggressive on his back and became the victim of Vurris' BJJ skills. It was all over before the 3-minute mark and earned Vurris the sub of the night award. 145 Jacques Leventreur vs Damiano Silva Leventreur lost his QFC warm-up after a brief slip-up led to him being on the wrong side of a hammerfist. He was ahead on all cards before that, dominating with some great ground skills. Silva was on the plus side of .500 heading into the opener, winning two of his first three by submission. Based on those gameplans, no one was surprised that this one went the distance, though the outcome raised some eyebrows. Silva was satisfied to lay-and-pray and he paid as Leventreur won easily on the scorecards, 30-26. 145 Rupert Everton vs Bite Mightson There’s something incredibly intelligent and handsome about Rupert Everton. You can tell he comes from good stock. He stood and banged with Mightson, who left his defenses in Vegas, and pummelled him into literal submission before the second round was up. Mightson cried a little, then cried a lot, and then retired. Sad ending to a promising career. 265+ Medzavi Nwaoge vs Dark Henry The Ugandan native won his QFC warm-up with a closely-scored unanimous decision, using a strong stand-up game to put him over the top. Dark Henry’s warm-up was a nightmare, if he remembers anything of it at all, which saw him get knocked out cold in 13 seconds. This fight reached the second round, but barely, with Nwaoge coming out on the winning side using an armbar submission. 205 Kazuma Kakuei vs Donald Trump Fight of the Night went the distance with the two splitting the two first rounds. In the third round, Kakuei clinched early and held on through a wild final two minutes to take the decision. Trump didn’t agree with the decision, to no one’s surprise, and evened his overall record at 2 and 2. Kakuei immediately called for a title shot, which had the 158 fans in attendance applauding. You have to love that confidence. 265+ Kokkoro Kirin vs Splendor Jackson Bookie Cheorge Guvalo should be ashamed of this matchup. We realize the roster is thin, but booking a fight between two guys in the same camp? Embarrassing. Kirin overcame his QFC warm-up loss to knockout his stablemate in a little over a minute. Was Jackson taking it easy? Could there have been money exchanged in the locker room? A little wink-wink before the final punch by Kirin? Kirin improves to 1-1 and Jackson falls to 0 and 2. 265+ Thomas Muller vs Ronan Raw This co-main event went the distance, but fans wished it hadn’t. Rated the worst fight of the night, much of the fifteen minutes was spent on the canvas, seeing both fighters flop around like beached tunas in an attempt to impress the judges. Judge Ben Watson, when asked afterwards said “whoever put in the 10-point must system is a chump. I would have scored in the negatives if I was allowed.” Harsh, but he did help score the match in favor of Muller. It was both fighters first MMA Tycoon fight. Main Event 265+ Tony Beer vs Bradley Jones The Main Event had Sydney’s own, Tony Beer, impress in his MMA debut with a first round knockout while taking home the first ever KO of the Night in the process. Jones had his own impressive debut in his QFC warmup, but couldn’t put any BJJ offense together this night, continuously getting countered by Beer’s speed. A memorable first Main Event, one of many to come for 3SD fans. 3SD 2 – January 23 - Preview Micro Arena in downtown Sydney is the once again the home for Super Sydney Square Down, this time SSSD 2. It’s a smaller fight card than the opener, but there are still some great matchups to look forward too. 170 Tayaen Porfirigo (1-0) vs Vinny "The Rat" Tulip (1-0) Two newcomers to the chart-climbing organization square off in the 170 pound division. Tayaen Porfirigo opened his MMA career in Rio de Janeiro, scoring a surprise second round submission win over Gueremo Dos Santos. Porfirigo used some good grappling skills to overcome a lazy first round, tiring his opponent out with the ground game and slipping a triangle in before the second round bell rung. His opponent also won his QFC warm-up, a first round beatdown of Run It in St Petersburg. Tulip set up the counter from the first ring of the bell and was never in any serious trouble, rocking his opponent a minute before he knocked him out for good. It subsequently retired from the game, saying “those 11 punches were the worst I’ve ever taken”. 265+ Dark Henry (0-2) vs Mr "Penny Pincher" Krabs (0-1) The good news is that someone will get their very first MMA win. Henry has had a disastrous start to his career, losing his QFC warm-up in record time, and his 3SD opener early in the second round. There’s still much to stay positive about though. His combined opponent record is a flawless 5-0, and his wrestling skills are strong enough to cause anybody worry. Does he have the stamina and confidence to give his all in this, his second fight in a week? Mr Krabs lost his QFC opener with two seconds left in the first round, disappointing, but not horrible considering the quality of his opponent. He’s already called out Henry, vowing to all who will listen about how badly he’s going to beat him. We like his confidence, but does he have the skills to back it up? 145 "Lord" Rupert Everton (1-1) vs Issy "Speed" Rapid (0-1) Ruper Everton is the greatest, no, second greatest fighter of all time. He retired Bite Mightson last week and he’s taking this fight against Rapid on short notice. Issy Rapid … I don’t know, is he? His QFC warm-up was in tournament 1033, a first round loss to Bruno Sultan. It started really well for the German native, as he took his opponent to the ground, working him over with sub attempts and some ground and pound. He just couldn’t finish him off, forcing the referee to reset the fighters about half-way through the round. By then, all the hard work left Rapid exhausted and he was easy pickings for Sultan, who slapped an armbar and made Rapid tap with thirty seconds left in the round. 265+ Jason "Double J" Jackson (0-1) vs Blocker "bigG" Gee Two newcomers to the organization has Jason Jackson squaring off against Blocker Gee. Jackson lost a close unanimous decision in his QFC warm-up, sandwiching one good round in between two duds. His clinch game was working well and insiders say that once he puts on more muscle, he'll be better able to control. Blocker Gee is a complete unknown, starting his MMA career later in life, and his manager Daniel "I don't sing White Christmas" Kay is being tight-lipped on what to expect from his fighter. Gee is 40 pounds heavier, Jackson 25 cm's taller. Will Gee try to get inside and use his strength? Will Jackson use his height and reach to keep his opponent away? Stay tuned.

Welcome along good friends and neighbors, this is retired MMA fighter, Punch “Drunk” McDermott, live from Frankie’s Diner … It’s Frankie’s Pizza, Punch. Frankie’s Diner, Frankie’s Pizza, Frankie’s f*cking Fine High-Noon Teatime, who cares? It’s a dump. This is what my life has come to now? Former Ashbourne Events Welterweight Champion … That tournament never took place, Punch. … undefeated in the CMMA … Also not true, Punch. Am I that hard up for money? Hellbent still pays me don’t they? That they do, Punch. They’re good people, good people. But we’re here in Koala town this week to talk about Super Sydney Square Down and their new sponsors, Sydney Fight Gear. Owned and operated by Cope T, Sydney Fight Gear is the number one clothing store in Sydney and we here at Super Sydney Square Down cannot thank them enough for sponsoring this organization. Fresh off a mildly successful January 16th opener at the Micro Arena, we return to the same venue for the much anticipated follow-up on January 23rd. SSSD 1 wasn't without its controversies, as the arena was only half-full. Said SSSD owner, Ssj mrTBE, "We expected more, I'm not going to lie. It's always tough to open a new fight organization, especially in this competitive market, but we feel we have the right recipe to make a go. These guys are all new, hungry fighters and if the opening fights are any indication of what to expect, watch out." 3SD - Opener 265+ Vern Vurris vs Tall Guy Vurris came into this fight with an incredible 5-0 record, but manager Mao Xiang downplayed it by pointing to his opponents' combined below-.500 record. Tall Guy wasn't fooled, but couldn't do anything to avoid being taken to the mat in the opening seconds. He did well for a bit, but was overaggressive on his back and became the victim of Vurris' BJJ skills. It was all over before the 3-minute mark and earned Vurris the sub of the night award. 145 Jacques Leventreur vs Damiano Silva Leventreur lost his QFC warm-up after a brief slip-up led to him being on the wrong side of a hammerfist. He was ahead on all cards before that, dominating with some great ground skills. Silva was on the plus side of .500 heading into the opener, winning two of his first three by submission. Based on those gameplans, no one was surprised that this one went the distance, though the outcome raised some eyebrows. Silva was satisfied to lay-and-pray and he paid as Leventreur won easily on the scorecards, 30-26. 145 Rupert Everton vs Bite Mightson There’s something incredibly intelligent and handsome about Rupert Everton. You can tell he comes from good stock. He stood and banged with Mightson, who left his defenses in Vegas, and pummelled him into literal submission before the second round was up. Mightson cried a little, then cried a lot, and then retired. Sad ending to a promising career. 265+ Medzavi Nwaoge vs Dark Henry The Ugandan native won his QFC warm-up with a closely-scored unanimous decision, using a strong stand-up game to put him over the top. Dark Henry’s warm-up was a nightmare, if he remembers anything of it at all, which saw him get knocked out cold in 13 seconds. This fight reached the second round, but barely, with Nwaoge coming out on the winning side using an armbar submission. 205 Kazuma Kakuei vs Donald Trump Fight of the Night went the distance with the two splitting the two first rounds. In the third round, Kakuei clinched early and held on through a wild final two minutes to take the decision. Trump didn’t agree with the decision, to no one’s surprise, and evened his overall record at 2 and 2. Kakuei immediately called for a title shot, which had the 158 fans in attendance applauding. You have to love that confidence. 265+ Kokkoro Kirin vs Splendor Jackson Bookie Cheorge Guvalo should be ashamed of this matchup. We realize the roster is thin, but booking a fight between two guys in the same camp? Embarrassing. Kirin overcame his QFC warm-up loss to knockout his stablemate in a little over a minute. Was Jackson taking it easy? Could there have been money exchanged in the locker room? A little wink-wink before the final punch by Kirin? Kirin improves to 1-1 and Jackson falls to 0 and 2. 265+ Thomas Muller vs Ronan Raw This co-main event went the distance, but fans wished it hadn’t. Rated the worst fight of the night, much of the fifteen minutes was spent on the canvas, seeing both fighters flop around like beached tunas in an attempt to impress the judges. Judge Ben Watson, when asked afterwards said “whoever put in the 10-point must system is a chump. I would have scored in the negatives if I was allowed.” Harsh, but he did help score the match in favor of Muller. It was both fighters first MMA Tycoon fight. Main Event 265+ Tony Beer vs Bradley Jones The Main Event had Sydney’s own, Tony Beer, impress in his MMA debut with a first round knockout while taking home the first ever KO of the Night in the process. Jones had his own impressive debut in his QFC warmup, but couldn’t put any BJJ offense together this night, continuously getting countered by Beer’s speed. A memorable first Main Event, one of many to come for 3SD fans. 3SD 2 – January 23 - Preview Micro Arena in downtown Sydney is the once again the home for Super Sydney Square Down, this time SSSD 2. It’s a smaller fight card than the opener, but there are still some great matchups to look forward too. 170 Tayaen Porfirigo (1-0) vs Vinny "The Rat" Tulip (1-0) Two newcomers to the chart-climbing organization square off in the 170 pound division. Tayaen Porfirigo opened his MMA career in Rio de Janeiro, scoring a surprise second round submission win over Gueremo Dos Santos. Porfirigo used some good grappling skills to overcome a lazy first round, tiring his opponent out with the ground game and slipping a triangle in before the second round bell rung. His opponent also won his QFC warm-up, a first round beatdown of Run It in St Petersburg. Tulip set up the counter from the first ring of the bell and was never in any serious trouble, rocking his opponent a minute before he knocked him out for good. It subsequently retired from the game, saying “those 11 punches were the worst I’ve ever taken”. 265+ Dark Henry (0-2) vs Mr "Penny Pincher" Krabs (0-1) The good news is that someone will get their very first MMA win. Henry has had a disastrous start to his career, losing his QFC warm-up in record time, and his 3SD opener early in the second round. There’s still much to stay positive about though. His combined opponent record is a flawless 5-0, and his wrestling skills are strong enough to cause anybody worry. Does he have the stamina and confidence to give his all in this, his second fight in a week? Mr Krabs lost his QFC opener with two seconds left in the first round, disappointing, but not horrible considering the quality of his opponent. He’s already called out Henry, vowing to all who will listen about how badly he’s going to beat him. We like his confidence, but does he have the skills to back it up? 145 "Lord" Rupert Everton (1-1) vs Issy "Speed" Rapid (0-1) Ruper Everton is the greatest, no, second greatest fighter of all time. He retired Bite Mightson last week and he’s taking this fight against Rapid on short notice. Issy Rapid … I don’t know, is he? His QFC warm-up was in tournament 1033, a first round loss to Bruno Sultan. It started really well for the German native, as he took his opponent to the ground, working him over with sub attempts and some ground and pound. He just couldn’t finish him off, forcing the referee to reset the fighters about half-way through the round. By then, all the hard work left Rapid exhausted and he was easy pickings for Sultan, who slapped an armbar and made Rapid tap with thirty seconds left in the round.

Minion GeorgeC speaking for the Master, Ssj mrTBE. A new 370K organization is being put together in Sydney. Recruiting has started for all divisions and the contracts are as follows: 3-fight introductory offer - 1500/2000/2000 Winners of at least two out of their three fights will be automatically re-signed to a five-fight contract, financing to be negotiated and approved by Owner. If you win only one of the three fights, you're going to be offered the same contract and a virtual pat on the back for a job well done. Losers of all three are, unfortunately, going to be put out to pasture. Jobbers are a necessary job in the entertainment world, but not in this organization. If you are looking to start fresh, or would like to test out a new fighter instead of using QFC, please let us know.

Round 3 - Semi-final winners for the 145 lb title. Times are to be determined, based on injuries, fatigue, etc. First round should be booked for November 7th

Round 2 Reima Polka vs winner of Striker/Kentas Rollo Galvarino vs winner of Grapple/Fox

Featherweight (145 pound) Tournament As discussed, our current GDL 145 lb champion is retiring, leaving the title vacant. I mass emailed our organization for interested parties in a single-match elimination tournament. The entrants are below: Rollo Galvarino Snapple Grapple Pure Striker Mike Fox Reima Poika Rimtas Kentas Because of the unevenness of the numbers, a traditional bracket cannot be made (i.e., 1v8, 2v7, 3v6, 4v5) so we’re going to make due and do what we do best: but on a great show. Current 145 rankings as of October 15, 2020. These are the rankings we are using to determine the matchups #1 Reima Polka – 1st round bye #2 Rollo Galvarino – 1st round bye #3 Pure Striker – vs #6 Rimtas Kentas #4 Snapple Grapple – vs #5 Mike Fox #5 Mike Fox – vs #4 Snapple Grapple #6 Rimtas Kentas – vs #3 Pure Striker

GDL 63: Byczkiewicz vs Alvar Our merchandise sponsor is open for business. Please visit to support and for all your laundry needs. https://www.mmatycoon.com/nutritionpublic.php?ncid=4660 Undercard Cover vs Gold – Tyson Cover is a very unhappy man. A loss to Buck Rogers at GDL 58 has seen his morale plummet to an all-new low. Losing his third out of four GDL fights will do that to a man. His peripheral stats are poor and his manager has been working on a new game plan for this fight in the hopes of righting the sinking ship. Benjamin Gold has been anything but. Sitting on the bottom of the 205 division, Gold is also 1 and 3 in his GDL career, but he was one big advantage over Tyson Cover … his one win was against him. Can we expect more of the same knockout power from Gold? Or will Cover be able to figure things out? Rogers vs Gunnarson – A little further up the chain in the 205 division, Buck Rogers takes on Magnus Gunnarson. A combined 10 wins and 10 losses, they bring a load of experience to the cage on Saturday. Rogers is riding a two-win streak after knocking out Tyson Cover and Usko Unbelivable, both by first round knockouts. His title shot seems a lifetime ago, but Insiders believe he’s rounding back into winning form. The Ice Pick won’t make it easy for him, as the Icelander has beaten the same two opponents in equally impressive fashion. It’s a contrast in styles, the stand and strike against the submission machine. Galvarino vs Grapple – Two men with their eyes on the 145 title, it’s the number 5 ranked Rollo Galvarino against number 8 ranked Snapple Grapple. Galvarino cruised to a knockout win in his first bout since joining the featherweight division last month and his manager feels like he has the hands to knockout any opponent. He works heavily out of the clinch and would prefer keeping things off the ground, exactly where his opponent is looking to go. Snapple Grapple faced off against his stable-mate at GDL 58 and lost by way of first round knockout. His manager said that Snapple laid down on instructions from his corner, something Snapple denies. The BJJ brown belt holder doesn’t need any help and he’ll be looking to show off his skills this weekend. Keskinen vs Henderson – Veikko Keskinen’s debut at GDL 59 didn’t go over very well, losing by submission to Grant Dukes before most seats were even warm. He’ll be looking to get back in the groove, using his power to his advantage, to get his first GDL win and first win in five fights. The job won’t be an easy one. Ryan Henderson is a man on the rise and is currently on a three-win fight streak. He was pushed to the limit at GDL 61 against Nicky Papas, but the outcome was never really in doubt. Henderson throws more punches than anyone in the business, so this should be an action-packed 155 lb fight. Sitsongrit vs Parker – Another fight in the 155 division, it’s two former champions lining up for the chance at another shot. Yodsingkhun Sitsongrit has gone the limit in four straight fights, splitting them, so there’s no disputing his stamina and determination. His last fight was a very close loss to Anders Hansson, earning him a fight of the night award. With no real holes to find in his game, Peter Parker will stick with what he knows best; making people submit. All seven of his wins have been by way of submission, a tribute to his amazing grappling skills. He’ll look to shake off back-to-back losses and get back in the title hunt. Bateman vs Do Urden – It’s a 170 lb division rematch from GDL 33 when Patrick Bateman puts his 7-2 record on the line against 4-2 Drizzt Do Urden. Bateman has been touch and go his last four fights since last facing Do Urden; a title shot ended in a loss, he was knocked out at GDL 41 and got rocked in both of his last two fights. But, importantly, he got back to his feet to finish his opponents off using a deadly ground and pound game. Do Urden prefers staying on his feet and his confidence in his striking skills increase fight after fight. He cut Ricardo Gonzales early in his last fight and stayed on him, knocking him out with a massive right hand halfway through the second round. Very contrasting styles, we’ll see if either fighter learned from their first matchup. Main Event Fist vs Armbach – They’ve been around since the early GDL days and haven’t every faced off in the cage? We’re rectifying that here. First Fist came crashing back to earth at GDL 59, losing his welterweight title to Angus MacArthur in a very tough fight. As if things couldn’t get worse, he got drunk and tattooed the world “Bitchy” on his back. The tattoo is ugly, and insiders say so is his mood. He’ll look to take out his frustrations on Bender Mein Armbach, GDL’s favorite named-fighter. Armbach got back to the winning after a first round submission win over Momo Andu at GDL 59. There’s no hiding his game plan, it’s straight to the ground and make his opponent pay. Fist has dealt with the likes before, his defense is incredible and it will take all of Armbach’s skill to pull this one off. Byczkiewicz vs Alvar – Speaking of former champions, there’s Blazej "Boxcar" Byczkiewicz. He loves to headline, he just would have preferred it being the reigning 205 light heavyweight champion. It was a tough and surprising first round knockout at the hands of Tonny Gomez at GDL 59 that had insiders wondering if Boxcar had reached his peak. It’s too early to tell if it was just a blip on the radar, or a sign of something more serious, but Byczkiewicz didn’t look like the man who had dominated the 205 division for so long. His manager said he took the time off to refocus and work on his accuracy. It doesn’t get much easier for him as he faces number 3 ranked Aloisia "The Magical" Alvar. A great wrestler with top-notch stamina, Alvar will look to use his height and weight advantage to pin Boxcar to the floor. Avenging a previous loss to Marlon John, Alvar used GDL 58 as a warning to the 205 division; it’ll be hard work and ground work from here on out.

GDL 62 Preview: GDL 62 Another great fight night in Vegas last night. Congrats to everyone on the card, you did great and made GAMMA proud. We have another event this weekend, October 17th, preview is below. Remember to visit our merchandise sponsor, Voodoo Nutrition, for all your drugs and laundry needs. https://www.mmatycoon.com/nutritionpublic.php?ncid=4660 and our horrible bookie, Hoolahan’s, which sponsors both GAMMA’s as well as the live events. https://www.mmatycoon.com/bookmakerpublic.php?bid=8554. Undercard Wick vs Matthews – Baba Yaga is not quite as rich, nor quite as deadly as his film namesake. He’s coming off a hard-fought majority win against now-retired Edith Reaves, a match spent mostly on the ground, a spot Wick is not comfortable with. So the fact that Wick survived the distance and won is a positive step in the right direction. He’s facing rookie Mick Matthews, who is a completely unknown talent. He signed up to GDL early and has been training ever since. His manager has been tight-lipped about him and it’s anyone’s guess how this 185 lb fight will go. Reem vs Royale – Zakrie Reems record is ugly, but the Rotterdam native has faced some very stiff competition in his short GDL career. His knockout of John Kingsley at GDL55 shows how much power he’s holding and may be a sign of things to come. The Charm City Kid knows about power, it’s the defense game he’s hoping to improve on. After rolling to a 5-1 record, he’s lost his last two fights in two very poor showings, lasting less than a full combined round. The Kimura is not his friend and he’ll be looking to bounce back this weekend. Cyganiewicz vs Marley – Two new and welcome fighters to GDL open the 205 lb division. A native of beautiful Gdansk, Stanislaw Cyganiewicz has been training for the better part of two years and steps into the ring under a cloud. No one knows what to expect, his manager has not addressed the press, but he’s clearly dedicated and focused. His opponent, Ezekiel Marley was unceremoniously kicked to the free agent pile on the 29th of September after a QFC loss. His new manager saw something in the Jamaican, and brings him into GDL with high hopes and a good pedigree. How will Marley come up with a game plan? Will Cyganiewicz make Lechia proud? 3MJr Maximus Jr vs Kimura – Since his move to the 155 lb division, Maximus Jr has been as dominant as any fighter in GDL. Four wins in five fights, the last two by nasty knockouts. He has good defense, which will be key against submission-heavy Tatsuya Kimura. Kimura now sits comfortably near the bottom of the 155 division, but we have a feeling he prefers it that way. Methodical and choosy, he’s been picking his fights and spots since GDL first opened. He’s a submission specialist and it’s feast or famine. Will he get Maximus off his feet or get his block knocked off? Brooks vs John – The 205 lb division was turned on its head after GDL 59 and two of the hopefuls will duke it out on Saturday. Eric Brooks is sporting a great five and one record, all five by way of knockout. He’ll be the first to tell you it was against lower-tier competition and he wants to show that his power is no fluke. Marlon John is heading in the opposite direction, but the 4-3 record is deceiving as he’s lost to the two top ranked fighters in the division. Is it a blip in the radar? Can John push himself back into contention or will Brooks continue his rise up the ranks? River vs Bates – Last we saw of Patrick Rivers, he was breaking Skippy McFarland’s arm in mid-August. Skippy didn’t deserve it, but as William Munny once said “deserve’s got nothing to do with it.” River had come in off back-to-back losses, one in a 5-round unanimous loss to the 185 lb champ, and one to P4P beast, Sergey Shipilov. He’s back against another formidable opponent, Armad Bates. Bates briefly stepped away from GDL for a training sabbatical and his manager believes he’s found himself again. Great news for GDL fans because this one has fight of the night written all over it. Main Event Khan vs Goodman – Another fighter coming back to GDL after an absence, Genghis Khan opens his second career in the super heavyweight division with a matchup against Saul Goodman. Khan’s last fight was a title loss way back at GDL 46, a loss so personal that he contemplated retirement. His eyes are firmly on getting his title back, but he has to make it through Saul Goodman first. Goodman was given first shot at the vacant Super Heavyweight title at GDL 58, but backed out for personal reasons. A win against Khan would go a long way in cementing himself as the number one contender. This one doesn’t reach the second round, it’s just a matter of who steps in better prepared. Tyurin vs Clark - Philipp Tyurin won the Super Heavyweight title at GDL 58 and celebrated his 21st birthday a week later. Not a bad month for the champ. He has great all around skills, moves really well for a big man, and is deadly accurate. He’ll need it all against Joe Clark, yet another former GDL who has come back into the fold. Clark once held the 265+ belt, way back fifty events ago, and is desperately looking to wrap it back around his waist. His hands are deadly, some of the heaviest you’ll see, but Tyurin is no slouch. Is the champ going to stand and bang, or will he play it more cautious?

145 Title Up for Grabs With the early retirement of 145 pound champion, Cleon Wright, the featherweight championship is now open for competition. We're going to run a one-match, PVP-seeded, tournament if we have enough interest. For example: 1 vs 8 2 vs 7 3 vs 6 4 vs 5 Any interested fighters, please PM me https://www.mmatycoon.com/managerprofilemanager.php?MgrID=133318 or reply below. Thanks and good luck Oct 12 Update - Fighters in Rollo Galvarino Snapple Grapple Pure Striker Mike Fox Reima Poika Rimtas Kentas

** Carlos asked to set this up. I don't do match reviews, there just isn't the time, but if any of you want to run some interviews or do some role playing, I don't mind teeing it up. Stay safe, enjoy GDL 60** Live from The Creggans Inn, overlooking beautiful Strachur Bay in Strachur, Scotland, this is Cheorge Guvalo with special guest, and new welterwreight champion, Angus MacArthur. Scotty Mac, thanks for having us in your ancestral homeland today and congratulations on the big win at GDL 59. How has the week-after been treating you and how do you feel? It’s a braw bricht moonlicht nicht the nicht. I's a wee bashed up mi laddi. That First Fist packs a crackrrr of a punch, but I noo he be cumin oot banging. I feel grrrreat parrrt from these bruises ye can see arrrr as 'Black as the Earl of Hell’s Waistcoat'! It's been a bonnie week and I'm still mad wae’ it blootered. I dae plenty of drinking and been scoffing chips and haggis all week, anee that's how us Scots like tae do up 'er, veen when we're training man. Rumor has it that you’ll be ringside this Saturday at GDL 60 to watch Von Mises fight Marty Snoozeman; is this a scouting trip? What will you be looking for? Och aye. I be going for the crack, av a wee keek 'n' wummin mainly n c sataboot Cheorge. Speshalee dee drookit 'n' braw ringside lassie ay Cheorge.......ay? But, fff I can see any holes, I will use 'em. Truss me I keep me wheesht and not say nowt. Yee 'ndrrrstandin' mi man? Let’s get back to your title win. It’s been heavily publicized that former champion, First Fist, asked to fight you specifically. How do you feel about that? MMmee glad ye 'sked mi that. At first when we were telt sassenach wanted to fight mi, we be happy to get the call out. But when his tactics came obvious to me, I became pretty crabbit n wanted to give im a wee skelp. I dinnae like an easy fight, so when I saw he was trying to knock my head off, which was how we prepared for the fight, I soon became damn fearg. Mi thought "jings wot kinda eejit tries to knock meee oot"? I got mair 'ngree as the fight went on, but I had to keep mi and as a pro, it is up to me to stick to the game-plan. Hoo ni der rrrite mind calls out a Yabite neeeway? You dominated all three rounds, it never looked like you were in any trouble from where I sat; what was your plan heading into the fight and was the outcome ever in doubt in your mind? As I said, we were pretty sure he would be comin' oot blasting 'n' we thought to use the tactic Colby Covington used 'gainst Robbie Lawler. It was plain as day that his camp had instructed Fist tae try to knock me oot and as soon as I heard 'ready fight' and he came steaming forward all gallus, we noo. I had no hesitation 'n' der nae danger man. I would beat him to the punch, cos he was screwball 'n' throwing the sink from his grandma's scullery. We knew we could probably wack 'im till he be all shoogly (dicht his ass). Carlos, Dao, Pikey and I widnae change tactics go light 'nee give him a clout roond de lugs like a wee bairn. I gotta say course I wanted tae gang drap 'im man. What’s next for Angus MacArthur II? We hae keep winning n making as many enemies greet as a wean man. Wannee make more punks riddy like Grumpy musta been. I av some plans of my ain but I keep stum yee get me Cheorge? ARGH I feeeget 'is mentee's name, but eee plan to doo im Ay? My father Robbie MacArthur dunnae be proud of mi not knockin' his ass into thee grrroond. "He's gonnee smash me when he comes over to Dun-staffnage from Mull".

GAMMA Development is under new management and looking for 348+ fighters who are active. Any division welcome, would love to fill out 145 and 155 lbs. https://www.mmatycoon.com/orgpublic.php?oid=5665 Thanks