Vadim.FecalStain

Heading home from the gym with ice cream cone in hand, Rodef Canmelianenko was approached by noted MMA "journalist", Jeff "got caught picking my nose ringside" Snorewood from famed keyboard warrior hangout/website SnoreDog. When asked about his last fight Rodef had the following to say: "Of course a loss is always a disappointment but I was not so much upset about losing as I was that it had been stopped in that manner. I feel the fans would have liked to see the fight continue and that some of them were let down by it." when asked about his current opponent, Rodef replied warily, noticing Jeff sneakily eying his ice cream cone: "It will be an interesting fight, because in most of my fights I've been the grappler and my opponents the striker. In this fight the situation is reversed and one must adapt and prepare for the unexpected. Will he continue to use his ground game which has brought him much success? Or will he try to swerve me by standing with me? MMA is like a wheat field full of naked drunken perverts. You must watch your back at all times and prepare for nasty surprises." When asked if he had anything else to add, Rodef then sternly proclaimed: "Yes I do have one final thing to say. If you even try to touch my ice cream cone again Jeff, then I will end your journalistic career right now with extreme prejudice. Such is justice in mother Russia!"

Charismatic fighter Brash "El Guano" Tootin recently conducted an interview with Jeff "my press credentials have been revoked" Snorewood of famed MMA site SnoreDog. As Jeff picked through his folds of fat looking for his pen, Brash groped a secretary and managed to talk her in to giving up her number. As Jeff peeled the belly lint and flab cheese off of his pen, Brash settled in and the interview began. Snorewood: So Brash, you recently had a crushing loss to heavyweight champ Raoul Duke, but rebounded nicely against JT Warwagon. How do you feel about your past few fights? Tootin: well you know it was a downer but the sluts and cocaine got me right back in the zone! My fans have been great, they are always supportive, I personally open every envelope and read every piece of fan mail, even the ones from fat chicks. Snorewood: How's your training camp been this time around? Tootin: honestly I've improved more since my last fight than I have in any other fight. From day one I've always preached about being well rounded and training all aspects and I stuck to that but I've gotten better results because I'm so motivated right now. It's almost scary. Snorewood: any thoughts on your opponent this Friday? Tootin: I'm facing Ana Conda, who is probably the most dangerous pure grappler on the East coast. On paper this looks like the classic grappler vs striker matchup, but frankly I think I'm a bad matchup for him. My wrestling and jiujitsu are very solid and while he's definitely had a lot of success against pure strikers, my well rounded style will create problems for him in the long run. His jiujitsu is obviously superior to mine, but I have better ground skills than anyone he's faced so far and I think he'll get taken out of his comfort zone. The winner of this fight will no doubt be closer to the title picture so this is a big one for both of us. Snorewood: Any final thoughts? Tootin: Yes, I recently have been chosen for a sponsorship by Spartan Fightware, they are in St Pete's and go check them out.

big bowl of this every morning http://www.bobsredmill.com/images/cache/BRM-31afe96d1163e50c444c2e04c869454e.jpg

Mere hours from his championship showdown with heavyweight titleholder Bud Spencer, members of the local press caught up with #1 contender and star of several MMA documentaries, Rodef Canmelianenko, as he was exiting Humboldt Park after a final strategy session with his team. When asked for his thought about the upcoming fight, the stoic Rodef had the following to say: "As with any other fight my corner has done extensive scouting. The gameplan has been formulated. I have trained for that gameplan. We know Spencer's approach. Should that approach change, contingency plans are in place. We know his strengths, and more importantly his weaknesses. We will exploit both. His striking may be dangerous, but his chin has been missing for so long it should be on a milk carton." When asked if he had any final words for Spencer, Rodef took a thoughtful bite of his ice cream cone and said only: "Bud Spencer. Get out the brasso and the steel wool and start polishing that belt. Get out all the bourbon stains. I want it nice and shiny when it's on my waist after this fight."

Here's the wikipedia on them: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Die_Antwoord Not that they sound anything similar to Attack Attack, but it's kind of the same concept of mixing a lot of odd stuff together

This should result in some epic knockouts!

My top fighter's gotten 2 of those emails fairly recently. Said he did a documentary on MMA or some such and was paid $1000 for appearing on camera.

Here's one that someone copied that she deleted. It's her and a family member in a car talking about Lil Wayne. I watched about half a minute of it before the boredom set in, don't know why she deleted this one.

I actually saw the video the first day it was up, and on her youtube channel were 3 or 4 videos that she deleted pretty hastily. They featured her and her friends acting like dumbass kids on the bus, throwing empty water bottles, instigating arguments, and shit like that. She's a waste of oxygen. She's typical of what I call the "Jackass generation".

oops, switched gyms a day earlier than I should have and didn't notice the fee, which explains the missing $50. my bad. However I'm still interested in my opponent's negative bank balance as I've never seen something like that before.

Rodef Canmelianenko has just defeated former HW champ Gynther Gail with a brutal display of vicious GNP, causing Gail to tap to strikes at the 55 second mark of the first round. Rodef is now eying Bud Spencer's belt, and will be returning to Humboldt Park first thing in the morning to further improve his already dangerous game.

http://www.mmatycoon.com/fighterprofilemanager.php?FID=28249 my fighter had $666 and change after gym fees today, fought a qfc and won, but now has a balance of $616. my opponent from that quick fight now has a balance of negative $48, which doesn't seem as if it should be possible (and still has a gym membership which should have automatically lapsed) http://www.mmatycoon.com/fighterprofilepublic.php?FID=27342

you got Cecil Peoples'd

I've been partial to Cynar and Nocino lately.

I've popped balance from boxing sparring, maybe throw a session or 2 of that in to the mix. If you've been doing only yoga you're going to run in to the "diminishing return" factor too.

My fighter in LA, Bart "Tha Glove" Gimmerson, just racked up a 5 second KO with a spinning backfist finish: http://mmatycoon.com/fightcommentary.php?FTID=90216 his previous fight ended in 39 seconds by uppercut but the ending commentary was kind of amusing: http://mmatycoon.com/fightcommentary.php?FTID=84237

http://www.myspace.com/theonemeatwagon Good old school thrash, singer sounds a lot like Paul Baloff. If you're a fan of Exodus, SOD, or DRI you'll like these guys. My last couple bands opened for these guys quite a few times. Great bunch of guys and they can hold their liquor.

I've always been more a fan of the old Swedish scene; stuff like Entombed, Grave, Unleashed etc. Also liked the jazz influenced stuff like Atheist, Cynic, Pestilence. Obituary occasionally had their moments in their early days.

It pleases me greatly to announce that I have advised my fighter Brash "El Guano" Tootin to sign with your illustrious organization. He was the #1 p4p fighter in the now closed Eastside Cage Fighting org. "El Guano" is a handsome devil with a magnetic personality that really fills a room and despite his rather strange odor, he is a huge hit with the kids who always have a ripping good time watching him fight. Outside the cage he is rather chatty but inside he is pure business. In fact his opponents have found him to be silent but deadly. Due to his excellent conditioning and strict diet, he is very resistant to injury and is able to fight quite frequently, and hopes to fight as many quality opponents as possible. As Brash himself would say "godspeed and farty on!"

Brash "El Guano" Tootin 3-1-0 265er based in NY: http://www.mmatycoon.com/fighterprofilemanager.php?FID=28240 needs sponsors and is on a 3 fight win streak in ECF and is currently the #1 p4p fighter in ECF