VERSUS - "Before the Bell"

July 14, 2012

Brilliant as ever Drake.

July 14, 2012

Just an absolutely amazing read every week. If Drake doesn't get writer of the year, it's a farce.

I completely agree. I thought that the write ups that NEI used to do were superb but I think that these takes it to another level again.

OnlyLeach · July 14, 2012

Found this in the archive... it belongs here with the rest

VERSUS - "Before the Bell" 12/06/12

I'm Drake Bradstone and welcome to the first ever episode of VERSUS "Before the Bell".

This show will preview upcoming VERSUS events and provide you with analysis from studio guests aswell as bringing you interviews with the stars of VERSUS.

Without further a do lets get straight to my first guest and co host of this weeks show. He is the former VERSUS Featherweight Champion, MR AZURE!!! Mr hows it going?

Mr. Azure: Im good Drake, dam you are looking good.. you bin working out?

Drake: A little... a little. Now then congratulations on your win

Mr. Azure: Thankyou, it was easy... you don't have to ask me about it.

Drake: Seriously?

Mr. Azure: Yeah, move on .... lets talk VERSUS.

Drake: Okay lets do that... Now then lets talk about VV3.... VV3 being VERSUS VENDETTA 3

Mr. Azure: I know that Drake.. I understand street.. I know what your talking about.... as do the viewers.

Drake: Okay then........ the headliner for VV3 will be HEAVY DAMAGE defending the Featherweight title against

KENNY "Abacus" CALCULUS.... how do you see this one going Azure?

Mr. Azure: This is easy one , Damage via decision , there are four fighters all trying to be top dog at this weight , three have failled and one hasnt , its going to take something special to dislodge damage from the top perch and Calculus isnt that special, I beat him up twice before and Damage did it once before , just want Damage to clean him out , so i can have another crack at the belt.

Drake: So you fancy another crack at Damage if he is still Champ after VV3?

Mr. Azure: Lets get this straight , he will still be champ! , Kenny is a good striker fair play but wrestling is the way to beat him and Damage already knows this ,and I would give my left bollock to fight Damage again , I have had two cracks at him and lost by decission twice and fair play I have nothing I can put against that , but now i know how he fights , he kicks low and often , he doesnt like the ground , but I can get him down , and I have also been to aggressive in our previous fights , I think I am the better fighter yet I have lost twice to him , which is a big thumbs up to his gameplan , fair play.

Drake: Interesting... well we have the good fortune of having the current VERSUS Featherweight Champion with us now through the wonders of modern technology....

Mr. Azure: Wow you have satalite feeds on this show?

Drake: We sure do...... shaaaasaammm!!! HEAVY!!! are you there?

Heavy Damage: Im here Drake (Sporting a "I killed Kenny T-Shirt")... wow you look good. Have you bin working out?

Drake: Tuesdays Arms and Back.... it's my life. Anyway what's with the T-Shirt.. big South Park fan?

Heavy Damage: Purely coincidental

Drake: Ok...Heavy, you found it relatively easy to take Kenny down in your previous encounter at Thursday Thunder X, are we going to expect more of the same this time around?

Heavy Damage: No, i always try to improve my game at every fight. I stay skilled in training and adding extras where you would not expect.

Drake: Have you done anything differently this time to prepare for Kenny?

Heavy Damage :My base and approach is always THE Same

Drake: If you are victorious, what is next for Heavy Damage?

Heavy Damage: Super fights and defending the VERSUS Fetaherweight Title...... Maybe à shot at 155 again.

Drake: Finally, we will be speaking to your opponent next, do you have a message for Kenny?

Heavy Damage: May THE best girl win

Drake: Well I wish you good luck in your upcoming Title Defence. Moving on we now have Kenny Calculus through the power of livestreaming... Kenny what's up?

Kenny Calculus: Hey Drake... is this the gun show? man you look tight!!!

Mr. Azure: Do we really have to listen to this guy?

Kenny Calculus: Hey Azure hows your Mommy?

Drake: Hey guys lets not go down that road.... Kenny, last time you hooked up with Damage it ended in you being stopped in the 4th round and lets be honest, Damage took you down at will. What have you done to make sure the result is different this time?

Kenny Calculus: Well Drake, it's as obvious to you and to everyone watching that night that Heavy Damage was horny. He was so horny, in fact, that his only option was to chase me around all night in a vain attempt to dry hump me to death. If you watch the replays, you can actually see his tongue hanging out of his mouth, much like a bitch in heat.

This time round, I've prepared better. I've brought a couple of chew toys and a Playboy, so that I can distract his rush and then, while he's having a tug-of-war with Cyclops in the centre of the cage, I plan to punch him in the mouth.

It's a cunning plan, Drake - I can't see how it would fail.

Drake: Interesting... This is your first title shot in Versus, are you nervous?

Kenny Calculus: No, but I am curious. What type of parents call their son - or daughter, we've both heard the rumours - "Heavy"?

Drake: I seeeee....We just heard from Damage earlier on in the show and he didn’t really have any kind words for you, in fact I got the impression he can’t wait for this fight. Do you have a response or any message for Damage?

Kenny Calculus: Well Drake, I think I can give Heavy Damage some advice. Ever since that scandal involving his testosterone doping and that Swedish penis enlarger, I've felt a bit sorry for him. But I've got this present for him [holds up a pump-action penis enlarger] so that he can at least take care of one of his problems after he loses his title.

Can't do anything about his girl parts, but I can at least suggest that he checks out a good plastic surgeon. Modern medicine can do wonders.

Drake: Okkkaaayyy.. my director is telling me not to speak to you anymore soooooo Kenny Calculus ladies and gentlemen!!!

Mr. Azure: What a douge!!!

Drake: Okay, so that's the Main Event covered, and I for one also think that Damage will probably be too much for Kenny unless Kenny can get that Cyclops medically cleared ready for June 16th. Now then lets take a look at another 145lb contest on the card Patrick v Moore who do you think will win this fight and why?

Mr. Azure: To be honest who gives a shit? , listen when you fight in an org like Versus 10-5s dont cut it nor do 13-6s these are journey men plain and simple , I would much prefer to see Cerdan vs Datu I (stupid fucking name) , although I think Kwaak and Hernandez look like very good prospects I like these two fighters , as for Patrick and Moore ,phhhht learn a second trade because your never going to be any good at fighting.

Drake: Well one guy who does give a shit is VERSUS owner Edward Banger and I had the chance to catch up with him in an undisclosed location.. heres what went down. Roll VT

Drake: Hi Ed... man its hot in here... these saunas at SPRAWL N BRAWL London are top notch... wow... you mind if I take my pants off? (Ed just shakes his head in disgust) Oh ok.... serious time. What brought you into this sport and why did you choose London to setup your first fight organisation?

Ed: What brought me to this sport? Action baby, action. 2 guys getting into the cage to see who is best, no bullshit, no excuses and no hiding place. I thought that London was missing an elite organisation that could compete with the best in the world so I started VERSUS here. I wanted VERSUS to be the kind of organisation that I would want my fighters to be in and the feedback that I have been getting tells me that I am on the right track.

Drake: Looking forward to Versus Vendetta 3, which is a sick card by the way, which is the fight you are looking forward to the most and why?

Ed: That's a tough question Drake, 'cos it is a great card as you say. Clearly the main even is going to top drawer but outside of that I'd say that Matsu vs Laroux is one that excites me. Here you have 2 young fighters with great records looking to get on top of a red hot light heavyweight division. Laroux has a point to prove after losing his belt and Matsu is trying to show that he has what it takes to go all the way; it should be a belter.

Drake: The 2 shows a week formatt, is this going to be a permanent fixture?

Ed: I think that most weeks you will see 2 shows at VERSUS. We have a large, high quality roster and I think we have enough talent here to put on 2 great shows for the public most weeks. Actually we just have one show in 2 weekends time but it will be the biggest show that VERSUS have ever put on; make sure you tune in to VERSUS Vendetta 4 live from the H2O arena on June 23rd!

Drake: Do you see any Versus events taking place outside of London in the near future?

Ed: If the powers that be in London do not get their act together and sort out a larger venue then yes Drake, there will be VERSUS shows outside of London. I'd like to take 20 of our elite fighters on a private jet to LA to pack out the Memorial stadium there...Yeah baby I can see it now!

Drake: I have to mention your own fighter, Ivan Milat. He has, what looks like, an epic struggle against the current Welterweight Champion Up Loaded at SundaySlam. Your thoughts on this fight?

Ed: Well you know Ivan Milat is a very intelligent fighter, he has an IQ of 143! So given that he was sparked by Up Loaded inside a round last time they met, I think this young guy must have something up his sleeve for that fight. Milat has proven himself to be the best of the rest at 170 and he deserves another shot but Loaded is a beast for sure so Milat really does have a mountain to climb to take Loaded's belt from him.

Drake: Thank you for taking time out of your busy schedule to answer my questions. (Video ends with Ed wondering why the hell he hired this idiot as his head of writing whilst Drake tries to hide his sweat drenched crotchal region)

Drake: Im back in the studio with Mr. Azure.... Now then SSXI, that's SundaySlam XI, who you got in the main event?

Mr. Azure: I guess I gotta say Milat just to piss everybody off and to keep a good relationship with the boss.

Drake: Inspiring, now for all the info on the other fights for VV3 and SSXI head to the VERSUS news page or if you are a manager with VERSUS check your mail. Join me next week where I will have more special guests and remember if you want to be part of the show send me a PM. Next week we will be previewing ERSUS VENDETTA whee 3 titles will be defended and I am especially interested in hearing off the 6 fighters taking part in those fights. PM me guys!!

July 16, 2012

Thanks for the kind words guys, was good fun! I wish I had more time to write regularly! Drake does an awesome job on these things, Writer of the Year for sure! :thumbup:

OnlyLeach · July 20, 2012

VERSUS - "Before the Bell" 20/07/12

I'm Drake Bradstone and welcome to the most analytic pre event show on the planet which is VERSUS "Before the Bell". This week I will be looking forward to VERSUS VENDETTA 8 where we will see Ivan Milat defend his welterweight title against a man who has been on a tear lately, Sparring PartnerBJJJ. We will also find out who will edge closer to a title shot for the featherweight championship in our main event when Mr. Azure takes on Keast Kann.

Now as you can clearly see I am no longer incarsonated in that hell hole of a prision.... I am a free man.... the triads let me go on one condition... and that was for me to reopen my London based bookmaker Bet Bradstone.... why? ... so that they can run a few illegal activities from it ofcourse... let's just say that the scenary is much better now that we have naked chicks walking around the place.... booo yeah!! The Bradstone Towers are being reconstructed and we are live from one of the porta cabins, hence my appearance (Drake gives a professional model pose and a twirl to show off his workman outfit)......

Right let's get down to business.... Edward Banger, that loveable rouge, has done it again.... he took Versus into the worlds top 20 this week, yet again and it won't be long before Versus is a constant in the top 20 and takes over as the number one org in London.... (points at the camera) and I god dam guara-dam-tee that you all!!! The current Versus champions are among the best in MMATYCOON and I for one are so proud to be apart of this great company (sheds a tear and then raises his voice)..... THEY USED A PAIR OF TWEESERS TO PLUCK MY BALLS MAAAN.... you b@stards (shaking his fist in the air).... pull yer self together Drake... come on you got a show to do... (talking to himself)... (sips his water)... Im alrite.... Im alrite.... now then lets take a look at the top of the card for this Saturdays VERSUS VENDETTA 8 coming to you live from the H2O Arena where 20,000 fans wil be screaming there little heads off and hopefully punting their brains out at the Bet Bradstone kiosk....

The 8th fight on the card consists of a welterweight yardstick in Pawel Tokarczuk who is pitted up against a Versus legend, the one, the only UP LOADED!.... and I have both gentlemen live on the phone now....

Drake: Pawel Im going to come to you first.... you have fought the best here at Versus, the current Champion Ivan Milat and the current number one contender BJJSparring Partner.... you are now facing another tough opponent .. in fact a legend... Up Loaded is probably standing in your way, blocking the path to a Welterweight title shot.... does a win here guarantee you a title shot?

Pawel: In a word "NO" ....... Milat and Partner BJJ are ahead of the rest of the class here at the moment so i dont expect a title shot ,the uploaded fight is more to my style ,Loaded is a standup fighter and so am I so we both are suited to keep the fight standing , I myself am still learning the ground game so i consider myself not quite good enough to go in with anyone who is primary a ground fighter ,my standup is coming on great but you need all styles to be one of the best and at the moment due to my age i simple havnt got these in my locker.

Drake: Up Loaded, It's great to be in the presence of a Verus Hall of Famer... how's it going?

Up Loaded: I'm doing great even though I lost both my titles in consecutive fights. After such a long winning streak It had to be done to help me improve my game and training. I'm fully motivated to strive for the 170 Belt again

Drake: Now there was a time when you had all of the 155lb and 170lb divisions scared... in fact the GTi Alliance challenged you on many occassions just to get beaten down..... you beat one Gti fighter last time out and now you face another in Pawel Tokarczuk... you rate your opponent? he is listening.....

Up Loaded: First of all, I liked beating most of the GTI managers * smiles*. Secondly: Pawel is an okay fighter, not spectecular great but decent. The more inportant is his manager as he's a steady good one with very good fighters on board. If Pawel wins..... then..... you'll see....

Drake: Coming back to you Pawel.... considering how many GTi fighters Up Loaded has beaten... is this fight personal?

Pawel: Not at all ,loaded is a great fighter and a veteran of ten belt fights already and as it says on his facebook page. FORMER VERSUS Lightweight Champion.... FORMER VERSUS Welterweight Champion ..... First man to be inducted into the VERSUS Hall of Fame.... FORMER TOP 50 ranked Lightweight in the world.... FORMER TOP 50 ranked Welterweight in the world..... so for me even getting in the cage with this man is an honour for me.

Drake: (whispers to his director) man these two guys should get a room.... no Ive tried... can't stir up shit!!.... (looks back up at the camera)... sounds like you two guys have a lot of respect for each other..... Up Loaded a win here will probably get you closer to your old Welterweight title... is that something you are thinking of?

Up Loaded: When accepting this fight I already told Edward I'd like a title shot if I win. So we are on the same page.

Drake: I guess you are aware of the multitude of talent that Ed has signed recently in the lower divisions... Im sure the welterweight divison will be next... you have your eye on anyone you would like to face who is not yet with Versus?

Up Loaded: I'd like to see some bantam and feather weight champs move up

Drake: Surely they wouldn't have the guts to do that? (stares down the camera) Pawel....What's the game plan for this fight?

Pawel: My plan is to use the Milat tactics ,which is to knock him out we will see if i can pull this off though lol ,this fighter is a hard man so win by any means possible has got to be my game plan.

Drake: Up Loaded, what do you think Pawel will actually do and what's your prediction for the fight?

Up Loaded: Pawel is going to clinch rape me and is able to win by decision or KO (knees) I can adapt now with the last 8 weeks of clinch training (4 sessions a week) so I can win by tko (strikes) just before I landed a jab down the middle through his defenses, he tries to clinch or body shot me and I counter with a huge head kick that drops him. Is that enough info?

Drake: hmmm yes, huge head kick you say... (scrolls down on his I-Pad)... dammit ... loserbet.com don't do head kick victory... oh shit yeah back to the interview.... Pawel...Who have you been sparring with at GTi 2 to try an immitate the Up Loaded style?

Pawel: To be honest i havnt concentrated on his style at all ,as i pointed out i need to improve my ground game so all trainning for the last two months has been geared to ground and no matter what the result of this fight , i will keep trainning ground skills ,im 25 so still have at least 9 years left in the game ,i need to get my ground up if i am to be considered a legit mma fighter and not just a MT fighter.

Drake: Guesssing your confident for this fight... how do you see yourself winning?

Pawel: lol every question so far you have got wrong I am not at all confident at all ,i dont expect to win this fight but see it as a learning curve ,to be 100% honest if loaded makes a mistake with his tactics he could loose it ,but if he gets his tactics right i dont think i could win it , i sound awfull sombre i know but i have had two crushing defeats in the last three fights , i am still 5-2 at versus but those two losses real messed my head up.

Drake: Alright, alright... no need to get cocky... . Any message for your opponent?

Pawel: Good luck sir! and may he best man win on the night

Drake: Up Loaded, you legend you..... you want to respond?

Up Loaded: Don't drink too much... It gives you a water head

Drake: okaaaayyy.... water head?? hmmm, right ....... good luck gentlemen.... I can't wait for this fight... to see Up Loaded back in the cage against such a plucky opponent... fight of the night potential? not if the trash talk was anything to go on... now I believe Ivan Milat is next on the phone... Ivan are you there?

Milat: Im here Drake.. how was your holiday?

Drake: Holiday??? I was in a f@cking skanky ass prision man... it wasn't even a proper prision... it was a pi$$ed stained hell hole and yes I did wet the bed so the pi$$ was my own doing... but they didn't have to whip my ass with bamboo to see which cheek would bleed first... evens the pair ofcourse... anyway enough ... enough... I don't want to talk about my ordeal ever again.... Let's get this interview started shall we??? So how's it going champ? How's our saviour, Edward Banger?

Milat: Hey Drake, your threads are looking bare my friend, you need to invest in a new suit...Yeah things are good, I'm 6-1 since I joined Ed Banger's team and started fighting at VERSUS and the 1 was against Loaded so I'm not crying over that. Ed believed in me after Stu Pidasol cut me loose and I owe him big for that. You know the big guy is just about to sail off on his yacht? I heard some crazy rumour that he was gonna leave you in charge while he was away? Where do the press come up with this shit?

Drake: Hey I can run this org... I can take it places man... places.... (Drake drifts off and starts to talk to himself) places... I hope I don't take it back to that prision.... my god what would happen if I went back there!!! Noooooooo... wait... Im fine ... Im back in London... woa sorry Milat... Ive got a bit of that virus that has been going round.. you know... anyway you looked fantastic in your last fight against, the champion at the time, Up Loaded. Your counter striking was really impressive and that right hook?! wow lights out central!! Is that something you have been working on?

Milat: I'm always working to improve my game Drake but I didn't work on that particularly. I always thought that I had the power to get to Loaded but the trick is not to let him get you first! That guy hits like a gorilla on steroids.

Drake: Now your first title defence is against a man that should pose a different kind of threat... my favourite type... that is "sickjitsu". You don't want it to hit the mat, right?

Milat: He needs to get me to the ground before he can play his game and as Yank and Tokarczuk found, that is a lot harder than it looks when bombs are landing. I respect BJJ's ground game, I really do but I don't plan on going to the mat

Drake: BjjSparringpartner is looking for his 6th straight win here in Versus... and you know how tough this division is so that is some record going into this fight.... he must be confident... what is the outcome of this fight?

Milat: I respect what he has done here at VERSUS, this is the toughest Org in the game but I think his record is a bit misleading. I give him real credit for beating Tokarczuk as he is a tough competitor but none of the other guys were punchers, Chris The Great and Arnold Jackson would have trouble knocking over a lego tower and you hit harder than Jason Bourne. What's he gonna do when my foot or fist explodes on his jaw? He's going to get knocked the fuck out that's what!

Drake: Bet Bradstone have you down as the two's on favourite (1.50).. worth a bet?

Milat: I think that you should stay as far away from betting as you can Drake but for the fans out there, I think those are fair odds, hell I'm going to have some of those. I might stick 20 grand on me to win at Bet Bradstone. Drake why have you gone pale? You ok?

Drake: Im fine.... (talks to into his mic towards his director)... don't let me go back... please don't let them take me... (Drake snaps back out of it) Err.... Thank you for your time Ivan and tell Ed I'm pining for him..... oh and before you go any message for your opponent?

Milat: My pleasure Drake, I respect your work but you really do need a new suit man. You need to drop this thing with Ed too, it's creepy. My opponent? I say that I respect him, I respect his talent but I worked hard for this belt and he ain't taking it.

Drake: Ivan Milat everybody!!.. great, that was just great.... so that's it for tonights... wait a minute... there's more?? wow... we have Mr. Azure via live sataleite link up... and he's live from GTi 2!! We are getting all this in a f@cking porta cabin???... wow we are serious here at Versus folks... all the mod cons... yeah let's get him on... Azure you there? (Screen is all snowy and pathetic)....

Azure: Hello ?? ..........Hello?..... can you hear me drake? Azure here m8, ,yes?....can you hear me?...........,Ahhh i can see you drake ,why have you got a hard hat on?

Thats it , wait ............,yes i can hear you now,

Hello drake and welcome to GTi-2 trainning ,you caught me just after my morning Bjj workout , so please forgive my appearence but it was a tough session this morning ,Bruce Jenkins was in a bit of a mood so he didnt hold back ,poor Esa Wideroos our youngest member got a rude introduction to GTi BJJ ,never heard a man scream like that before......................

So i guess its down to buisness? (Azure's face changes in an instant to a serious look)

"Those lie detector test on jerremy kyle dont mean nothing ,those triplets are not mine! , i wore protec.........What? ....oh ..... lol....can you cut that bit out?

Drake: Sorry Azure we are live from coast to coast....Now This will be the third time that you have fought Keast.... is this an annoyance or does he deserve another chance to beat you?

Azure: This will be Kann's formal introduction into Versus ,what went on in other orgs. means nothing here ,everyone starts at 0-0 when they sign to fight @ Versus , I have been chossen to show Kann what type of opponents he is going to face over the next six months or so ,so I see this fight as a warm up for the Lindback encounter thats sure to happen pretty soon ,Kann is a good fighter so deserves another go at me ,but if i was a betting man , i would head over to bet bradstone asap and bet my house on an Azure tko again.

Drake: Now you have fought the best that Versus has to offer at 145 and a win here puts you on a streak of 3 wins.... you looking for a title shot soon?

Azure: I would expect a title shot drake to be honest ,BUT and its a big but, its been said before that there are a lot of fighters in the 155 div and the 135 div that can move down and up in weight to fight at 145 ,Damage done an awsome job to defend the title as often as he did ,now he has lost it ,he is one of the chassing pack ,myself and Lindback would be a good fight but Vargras has just signed at 135 for versus ,and a Lindback Vs vargas encounter is a much higher hyped fight at the momment , and at the end of the day we all want whats best for the org. , i might just loose 4 lbs and drop down to 135lbs myself as Puska and Vargas would be good fights for me , we will have to wait and see how the dust settles after this weeks matchups.

Drake: In both the previous fights you were taken down but showed an impressive aray of defensive grappling techniques to nullafy Keast's attacks and you were able to reverse the position in both fights.... guessing your not scared of being taken down then?

Azure: It could go to the ground but then you have to look at our stand up games and mine is better than his on paper ,I think he will try to take me down but i am happy to go there with him because he isnt going to out grapple me and i havnt been stopped in 19 fights in the standup or on the ground ,so it will come down to who wants it the most.

Drake: Is this the type of fight you dread? I mean you should win going on previous form but Keast is dangerous... just take his last win over Rivaldo where he came back from a poor opening round ..... a loss here hurts your chances of getting that belt back!

Azure: To be honest i havnt given him much thought ,you cant worry about fighters you have already beaten ,and not just beaten ,beaten the shit out of ,we have met twice ,both for title fights ,we went four rounds combined and he lost every one , and he lost them all on the ground , now consider i KoD Cerdan in my last fight who is a very powerfull standup fighter and you start to get the picture? THIS IS VERSUS and its diffrent here ,nearly everyone is good on the ground but it has been talked about this week over a few beers ,a blackbelt in BJJ can range from 130 points to 145.7 points so there is a vast diffrence in the standard of blackbelts out there ,i got mine @GTi so you know its pretty good

Drake: Any message for your opponent?

Azure: Yes i have Drake , i would like to ask him why he is paying $1000 a week for trainning at a 100 capacity gym ? the concrete jungle in london only charges $600 a week and has less than 30 fighters there ? ,when people see private gyms they shouldnt think that they are not open to good fighters ,all they need to do is mail the gym owner and ask for an invite ,some will tell you to sod off ,but others will actualy send you an invite. ok is that it now?......are we off air yet........................

Drake: Not yet...

Azure: Was that ok Drake?...... aww shit i forgot to push the merchandising .......can you sort out a mention for 1337 London,HGH amsterdam , and SFW st.petes? i get lots of goodies off them if i mention them in interviews ,and i am willing to split straight down the middle..........70/30

Drake: We are still on air Azure....

Azure: What's that?... we are done?.. okay see you later Drake...

(Azure cuts off)

Drake: What a ...... okay Versus fans we are nearing the end of this weeks show..I'd like to thank the managers who allowed me to speak to their fighters.... I'd like to thank the production crew... even though it's sometimes amateur hour around here .... (starts to cry) Im sooooo glad to be back though... amongst friends... instead of people who liked to poke fun at the Bradstone weener!!! yes they mocked me in that prision... they mocked my manhood (Head in his hands crying like a little girl)... they were so mean... (starts to suck his thumb).... well I hope you all enjoy the Saturday night main event ... VERSUS VENDETTA 8 is going to rock London.... make sure you tune in to the play by play from 6pm.... oh and if anyone knows the identity of those 4 men who took me to the cleaners on Wednesday with their bet on the Colonel... be sure to let me know.... next week Im hoping to be joined by a very special guest... so special I don't even know who it is yet..... but he will be special.... good night folks... you all stay classy Versus fans

September 12, 2012

working on this for pre fight shows :-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QOd9AVe5o-g

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ss8IoLRrlWw

September 14, 2012

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nCFKDQ7s-2s

soyster89 · September 16, 2012

Wow, very very cool. I can't wait to see them in the future.

September 17, 2012

Fantastic stuff Soul! When the Triads stop torturing Drake and assuming that they leave him with the ability to speak then we will get Before The Bell back up and running... :shades:

Grasman · September 17, 2012

Awesome stuff Soul!

December 23, 2012

Ho Folks, Drake is back!

VERSUS - "Before the Bell" 26/12/12

Hi I'm Drake Bradstone, "Of course you f@cking are!" I hear you cry and yes I have been AWOL for like the past 3 months and I'd LOVE to give you some BS story that Ive been fighting off some sort of terminal illness but unfortuately it's worse...... pussy whipped, that's right good old fashion beatdown from Mrs Bradstone. The good news is Mrs Bradstone is away visiting her family at this festive time of the year.... ho ho ho... and yes I've made an effort just check out this kick ass Santa Claus outfit... yeah you're jealous... donated to me by the Versus Heavyweight Champion "Hurri-cane" Kane Williams..... big thumps up Kane. Now then let's kick on with this SPECIAL edition of VERSUS "Before the Bell" and take a look at the Boxing Day Event which will be VERSUS VIVISECTION 11.

Drake: Right if I'm going to give you guys the full breakdown of who, what, why and how, then I'm going to need a partner and anyone who has seen this show before knows that I get the very best special guests... such as the current Featherweight and Lightweight Champion Mr Azure, the Heavyweight Champion Kane Williams and the "Pioneer of MMA" Sir Tom Breedon... well it's no different today folks.... please welcome alllll the way from..... (Drake is interupted by his producer via his ear piece)

..... (talking to his producer) .... ok, a ha, riiiiight..... so he can't make it?.... too tired from working?..... he was out all night doing what???.... drank too much sherry and mince pies!!!.... got to shovel whose shit???... reindeers??!!! ok, well get me a replacement!!!.... I don't care..... ANYBODY.... this is my god dam come back show and you're making me look stupid..... how is this my fault??.... how was I supposed to know he was working Christmas Eve......... aha... aha....aha.... right.... so he works this shift every year...... all I had to do was look it up.... ok, ok I hear ya... (turns to the camera)

Ok folks looks like my guest won't be joining us this evening but don't worry we will go to a commercial break and upon return I will percivere to give you the lowdown on VIVISECTION 11!! DON'T........... touch that dial (Cheesy grin and points at the camera)　

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The MAIN EVENT is for the most prestigous crown and that is the VERSUS Heavyweight Championship, never before has London seen such a dominant Champion at 265lbs but can IVAN BARAC take the title away from KANE WILLIAMS?? you think so?? so...

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***********Back to the studio************************

Drake: Welcome back, now during commercial a genuine Christmas miracle happened folks.... my special guest has turned up... that's right so without further delay I would like to introduce to you my special guest for the evening, Father Christmas SANTA CLAUS!! Hey Saint Nic, hows it going?

(An overweight figure is slumped in the guests chair and the Santa suit is clearly 3 sizes too small and Drake is now wearing his standard Armani suit.)

Santa: Im good Drake, sorry I was late traffic was terrible.

Drake: But don't you FLY .... Santa Claus?

Santa: Yes.... course I do.... I meant parking was a bitch....

Drake: Okay, so we are going to look at the two title fights at VERSUS VIVISECTION 11, lets start with the Welterweight battle between Mustaffa Spliff and MK Ultra... what's your feelings on this fight?

Santa: I think the first question should be..... what the f@ck is a VIVISECTION?

Drake: Good question Santa... let's see... I have my dictionary here.... I got it...... Vivisection is defined as surgery conducted for experimental purposes on a living organism, typically animals with a central nervous system, to view living internal structure. The term is sometimes more broadly defined as any experimentation on live animals. The term is often used by organizations opposed to animal experimentation but is rarely used by practicing scientists. Human vivisection has been perpetrated as a form of torture. Edward Banger you evil B@stard......... So is this fight going to be torture for these two men?

Santa: For one man Drake, for one man.... and I think I know who that man is going to be....

Drake: Please tell us Santa Claus...

Santa: It's going to be Mustaffa Spliff...

Drake: So you think Spliff will drop the belt this evening?

Santa: Oh no ho ho ho ho.... I mean Spliff is going to be tortured by Ultra's bitching and wining in the post fight press conference that follows a successful defence of his Welterweight Championship..... MK will probably complain that because Spliff has a Black Belt he was cheating!!!

Drake: I see.... so you think Spliff's superior ground game will be the difference here?

Santa: Damn straight.... once Spliff gets this fight down to the mat... and he will.... then he's going to be looking for positional advantage and he won't stop.... where a normal man takes a breather Spliff unloads with ground and pound to open more doors.

Drake: I think you are right about the ground game Santa but I'm not too high on Spliffs ability to get the fight to the mat in this one.... MK has proven really difficult to take down of late and I'm not to sure that Spliff will like the counter boxing style that MK Ultra brings.

Santa: Yeah Ultra brings a crisp boxing style and may prove a tricky customer in the later rounds BUT and it's a big but (hence the capitals) MK will have an Olympic class wrestler shooting for takedowns from the off and I personally dont see this fight staying on the feet much.... so Ultra's CRISP boxing aint going to be a factor now is it Drake my boy!!!

Drake: Okay Santa calm down... so you think the odds of 2/5 available at BET BRADSTONE represents value?

Santa: VALUE? VALUE? it's a f@cking licence to print money my esteemed friend..... so go draw out the Bradstone Millions and smack it all on a successful title defence.

Drake: Bet with myself... that doesn't make sense...anyway so Santa is picking a win for the Champion by stoppage but I consider myself a bit of a fight professor and I'm going to go with a distance win for the challenger, I just feel that Ultra will keep the champion at bay with his superior boxing, yeah he might get taken down but Ultra will show the VERSUS viewers that he can spring back up and get the underhooks he needs to start again with the striking and win at least 3 rounds.

Santa: No f@cking way!!

Drake: Okay so now let's talk about the main event, the Heavyweight Champion Kane Williams is a beast, from the Convicted camp under the tootiledge of Soyster Eighty-Nine... this guy has only one loss which he quickly put right in the rematch against Hall of Famer Llewelyn Carter back at Wednesday Wipeout 7. Kane has 16 wins, 16 knockouts... the guy talks trash and that doesn't sit right with VERSUS officials.

Santa: That's right Drake, I think Edward Banger has tried to bring in several mercenaries to take this guy out and bring back honour to the VERSUS Heavyweight Championship but all have failed....

Drake: You like Kane in this fight Santa?

Santa: I like him in this fight but I don't like the man..... since becoming a MMA fighter Kane has taken a walk on the darkside.... let's just say he has enough coal from me to start his own coal mine.... that man is BAD!

Drake: Let's not go down that road Santa as I can't afford another law suit.... instead let's focus on Kane Williams the MMA fighter inside the octagon...

Santa: Inside the cage Kane is probably unstoppable.... he has too much strength for any of these Heavyweights at VERSUS at it will take somewhat of a sucker punch to rock this guy.

Drake: So Ivan Barac has to get lucky?

Santa: Ivan is a funny matchup for Williams so he may actually stand a chance early on in the fight. His punches come from awkard angles, he has a hunch back style like he broke his back when he was five and it never healed properly. The problem for Ivan will be if he's in that clinch then his style goes out the window and Williams crushes him.

Drake: Williams is a good friend of the show and I'm not going to take sides but I think you are right on this one Santa, Williams should have enough to take out a game veteran in Ivan Barac. I can't believe these guys have never fought before.... both have been in VERSUS a long time so either way it's going to be interesting.

Santa: I've heard it could be a record breaking event also with the move to a 2 hour pay per view from 1 hour.

Drake: That's right, the show will be live on pay per view for 2 hours, the first time in VERSUS history so huge hype on what should be an exciting show for the millions watching at home. Well that's about it folks, short a sweet for the holiday season..... I thank Santa Clause for his insightful words and until next time you stay classy VERSUS fans.

Santa: Great... can I take this f@cking Santa outfit off now.... god dam it can't believe you made me dress up like this...

Drake: Erm Dave the cameras haven't stopped rolling yet.... Oh f@:ck Ed's gona chop my balls off!!!....

(The show ends with Drake hitting a double leg on Santa, I mean Dave, and repeatedly punching him in the face while camera men jump in to try and split them up)

Have a Merry Christmas from all of us at VERSUS and a Happy New Year.

December 23, 2012

Hi Folks, Drake is back!