Guest Posted March 1, 2011 Report Share Posted March 1, 2011 Things are looking good with Syn. Look forward to seeing you guys get back to the top of the food chain. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 1, 2011 Report Share Posted March 1, 2011 Event Commentary These custom Syn videos are absolutely awesome! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
felagund Posted March 3, 2011 Report Share Posted March 3, 2011 These custom Syn videos are absolutely awesome! Indeed, they are incredible! Damn, I gotta train one of my fighters up to be Syn-worthy. It's the one org that captures my imagination! (no offence to orgs my fighters are in, they are great too ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avon Posted March 6, 2011 Report Share Posted March 6, 2011 Syn' 162: The Human Race - Trauma Team Report Well, well, well, I’m not guilty… or maybe I am, but somebody up there likes me! Franky Sin is out on some Mafia business, Avon and Wlhelmina are busy with the beloved child and I have some relief… But what happened to our 20 lovely psychopaths in this bloody event? Let’s see… 1st Fight: Tim Lachance vs Ivan Drago I thought Lachance could take this away, but Drago’s right hand was of another opinion. Drago simply imposed the law of the jungle over his opponent in this fight: every time he managed to touch his opponent, there was big damage on the line. First punch: cut! Second punch: knockdown! Third punch: knockdown again! Fourth punch: rock and roll! Just a matter of time before a final, fatal overhand finally found its home in Lachance’s jaw, ending it all. Great display of punching power from Drago, let’s see if he can do it again with someone who responds fire… 2nd Fight: Rumple Stiltzkin vs Malik Alexander Man, that boxing from Alexander was so dirty that it will take years to clean the cage walls after this fight. A strange fight, where the celebrated intelligence of Stiltzkin produced nothing more than a stubborn takedown strategy, while Alexander needed nothing more than some clinch and pierce to slowly destroy his opponent from inside. Now, there are two ways a building can fall down: when hit from outside, and then you need a big bulldozer, or from inside, and you simply need to well place your explosive charges with right timing and spot. Alexander was full of C4 in his hands which he distributed generously with his hands. Finally, that was the result: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nnJeYiiYuzc&feature=related 3rd Fight: Lucifer Jones vs Nickolai Katorjinov Now, I can never tell you any truth about Hugo’s diet while in the Island, nor I am able to state where all that shaving foam and razors came from. But, about Jones, he’s back for good He has been able to harness Katorjinov’s superior disruptive power and force him to hear the news from the Judges, and they were bad news for the Russian sensation. It has ben a K – fight, with Jones dominating from the start, able to impose his idea over his opponent, due to his great activeness and accuracy. Katorjinov left little signs of his presence in the fight. Hard to say if he chose a counter striking strategy, but found nothing to counter due to Jones’s amazing footwork, or simply was overwhelmed by Jones’s fire rate. Be it what you like, Jones threw more, scored more, and hurt more. Need to say more? 4th Fight: Mala Ika vs Billy Goat Well, Ika lost, but I would not be too compassionate with the guy. Sure he suffered, but his new girlfriend will clean his tears away and raise his… morale up. New girlfriend? Yes, I know you’re thinking something between a walrus and a waste dump, but, actually, here she is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1-NwWC0zXRs&feature=related How can it be? I guess it could be some quantum balance between a couple like Batman + Dawson’s little slut and this one. But, to be honest, if a mummy like Michael Douglas can screw Catherine Zeta Jones and Reverend Marylyn Manson can roll with Stoya (please, don’t insult my intelligence again pretending you don’t know who she is… we are all mammals here, except for Ika!), then everything can really happen. Ika wanted to keep it standing, but he failed to. On the ground, Goat was more than happy to control, and did not much to finish. Not the brightest show ever, but it served the dish. The real show will be in hotel room when Ika gets his consolation prize… 5th Fight: Oscar Alarcon vs Stevie Why Whyy-yyyy-yyyy-yy-yy-y-yy-yy oh Why! Whyy-yyyy-yyyy-yy-yy-y-yy-yy oh Why! What is that? Well, a couple of options: 1. Nilmar gone completely schizophrenic. 2. Annie Lennox’s single. 3. Alarcon’s desperate cry after being subbed in a flash at the end of round two, after dominating the fight thus far. For the ones solving the quiz, there will be a copy of Annie Lennox’s “Why” sung by Nilmar Gracie, who is trying to start a new career as a crooner. You know, submission wizards would not be called like that if they were not able to come out with some magic to enlighten a dark night, and that’s the way things go when you roll on the ground glued deep with a brown belt. 6th Fight: Chris Mayo vs OMG Zulud Mayo resists two rounds and a half against the fury of Zulud, but finally he has to give up. Some of my informants swear they have seen Mayo in a church just a couple of hours before the fight. He was praying devotedly: “My Lord, I know I have not been a good Servant to Your Almighty Will till now. Yes, I screwed some girls, but they all said they were eighteen, or, at least, they were Moubarak’s nephews. Yes, I drink sometimes, but never more than a whiskey bottle at dinner and another at lunch. Yes I smoke, but it’s all good stuff from Amsterdam, and I can offer if you like. Oh, I am not exactly the non violent kind but, well, with all respect, You made up a mess at Gomorra, so I think You can understand. Now, I know there is no chance I can win this one, but, please, I like my face as it is now. Don’t let it be rearranged. This is all I ask”. Well, it did not work. Mayo accepted the open field battle, and paid hard for this mistake. Zulud set his heavy artillery on target and started firing his heat seeking missiles until finally a big elbow landed in the devastated territories of Mayo’s head, sending its clear message of destruction. Now, Mayo needs plastic surgery and, since he’s forced to choose a new face, he chose this one: http://www.mmatycoon.com/managerprofilemanager.php?MgrID=22938 Well, can you blame him? Fine tastes my friend, but a hard peak to achieve. 7th Fight: Domenic Amato vs Casey Carwin Amato played cat and mouse with Carwin for a little while, then unleashed a hook with the power of elements inside it. His early takedown at the start of round one made many of us think about some ground based strategy, but maybe in the end it was just some form of deceptive behavior, scaring Carwin about takedowns, and then taking him off guard with some powerful strike from distance. An impressive proof of speed and power by Amato. Even more impressive, he started singing “That’s Amore” just ten seconds after the verdict: what a showman! 8th Fight: Lucas LaVey vs Gattsu Emelianenko I thought Emelianenko would have won this one, but he actually did not. His main fault in tonight fight has probably been a lack of determination in imposing his ideas over his opponent. He managed to take LaVey to the ground more than once, but never was able to keep him down, doing enough to prevent the crowd from falling asleep and the ref from commanding the standup. Similarly, he has been able to instigate clinches his opponent managed to break a second after. Emelianenko looked like an interstate patrol guy trying to put his handcuffs on Houdini’s wrists: an impossible task against the more elusive and slippery opponent ever. On the other hand, LaVey was very active with his kicks, and surgically accurate with his punches. An undisputed victory which puts LaVey in the thick of things once again after his recent loss. 9th Fight: Fred Lee vs Fidel Puno Puno played Russian Roulette for three rounds and came out alive and winning. When, after a minute in round one, a cut opened just above his left eye, we all thought he was doomed. We knew Lee would have worked with merciless efficiency on that little opening, and so he did. Cut opened more and more but, unlike many other fighters which would have been taken out of their fight plan by fear and discomfort, Puno went on playing his game with the same calm of a Zen Master in the silence of his garden. He acted like nothing had changed, using his mixed fight style to fire from any angle with brutal efficacy. He did not leave a single round to his dangerous opponent, forcing the doctor to stay out of the cage and winning by decision. Just ten seconds more, and I am sure some medical decision would have occurred, but life is like that: a razor’s edge with joy on one side and desperation on the other. 10th Fight: Lee Villa vs Cleveland Brown The Zombie is back, and it’s no good news at all for anyone in Syn Light Heavyweight division. We all know the way things went last time these two guys met. This time, it has been quite different: Yeah, you might think that all that blonde hair is not the Korean Zombie style, but my hair stylist guarantees this is the last trend for oriental fighters… Better to be killed by a head kick after four minutes of round two, or by a brutal knee after two minutes in the same round? Well, it does not seem the kind of dilemma I would like to answer, but you can ask Brown for it: he will politely answer as soon as he regains the use of word. Well, it’s over. I have to confess I miss my conversations with Avon and my hard sex with Wilhelmina. Life is less spicy when no one tries to kill you or rape you. But this is Syn City: I am sure there is something like that for me, waiting just around the corner. Goodnight, and evil dreams… Nilmar. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avon Posted March 6, 2011 Report Share Posted March 6, 2011 Syn' 163: Moi Want Moah - "Nilmar bed tales vol I" This is a test about how unnerving a writer can be without being killed by his own readers. You know, it’s incredible, but some poor, one track minded, mono-dimensional guys seem to believe that, when you have a main event with the living legend of MMA Jigoro Kane facing Kenji Silva, when Cavalera tries to get revenge over the killing dirigible Led Zeppelin, where there are four titles on the line, a writer should write about the fighters, and the matches. How wrong you are! I am here to tell you about my private life, which involves my irresistible charisma, Avon Barksdale’s antisocial disorder, Calvin Broadus’s precarious loyalty and, of course, main event of the evening, Wilhelmina insatiable sexual appetite. Last chance to give up guys… still there? Well, now you’re mine. And now I know you’re dumb! Where to start, then? Oh, ok: luxury hotel room, futon bed, me and Wilhelmina wrapped in some acrobatic rock and roll. I became probably the only under 50 man to regularly take Viagra, but that’s it. Then, I heard a knock at my door. The ones of you with major expertise in Nilmarology sure will know it was 3 a.m. I thought it was Avon, Wilhelmina cried “Oh God, my husband!”, I hid her in the closet and started thinking about the song I would have liked as a soundtrack for my burial ceremony. It was Calvin Broadus instead. He looked strange, like he was nervous. Anguished, I might say. “Man”. “Calvin”. “I have a problem”. “More than one, if I have to judge from your psychiatric diagnosis”. He took out a respectable 357 magnum, placed it right between my eyes and said: “no time for jokes this time, man”. “Oh, OK, why don’t you sit down? That piece of steel must be quite heavy”. “My heart is heavier than that man”. “You have a heart? How did it happen?”. “A-ha… jokes again?”. “Sorry for that. Go on, please”. “Well, you know, I am Avon’s right arm”. “Sure you are”. “And a good friend to him”. “The best”. “Just…”. “Just what?”. “I am a man, man”. “Can you explain a little better?”. He looked even more nervous than he was when he first entered, and I begun to understand the problem. Did not know if I had to laugh or cry in terror. “Well, you know, men are mammals, aren’t them?”. “So says Darwin”. “And mammals have a neural something”. “Neural physiology?”. “Like I said. Neural priority, and my priority is, well, ehm, how can I say…”. “Fucking?”. He stared at me with a weird kind of gratitude. “You’re a genius, Nilmar! Now, there is this gorgeous female… a real woman… sexy, steaming hot, busty…”. “Are you screwing Wilhelmina Calvin?”. “Can’t take my hands off her man”. He went down on his knees… “Don’t tell Avon man, please! I need your help”. “Avon is your best friend”. “I know”. “He’s your boss”. “I know”. “He paid for everything you got”. “I know”. “You’re really bad to him. You must redeem yourself”. “How can I do it?”. “Go out, search for Wilhelmina, tell her it’s over and then do all you can to get them married”. He cried tears of gratitude, and ran out in the night. Wilhelmina got out of the closet and started some rock and roll again. Sometimes I can be a real bastard… Now, the fights! 1st Fight: Tommy Gunn vs Ronald McDonald Well, if you have to start a night like this from somewhere, why not starting it with a blood feud? Tommy Gunn searching for revenge over Ronald McDonald and, if he gets it, you can be sure there will be a third chapter in this saga. Fight against Gunn has been the last win for Ronald, who then entered a dark tunnel made of bad losses and depression. This is the chance to get out. He’s clearly superior while standing, but will have to be careful not to get caught into the deadly spirals of Gunn’s ground game. Anyway, if he manages to keep focused, I think he could well prevail. Prediction: McDonald by decision. 2nd Fight: Gundar Thorsen vs Aleksandr Karelin The Viking from New Zealand Gundar Thorsen faces the (failed?) Russian Experiment Aleksandr Karelin, in a fight where pride is on the line. Thorsen has been quite on the ups and downs recently, and has to stop the merry go round if he does not want to become an amusement park toy for more promising up and comers. Karelin still proudly shows his Einherjer belt, but still has to prove he’s Syn-Worthy. Karelin looks like he’s the better grappler, due to his Sambo background, but has something less on the feet. Thorsen could try to exploit his superior Muay Thai if he manages to impose some K -1 mood on the fight. Prediction: Thorsen by TKO 3rd Fight: Omar Salcedo vs Hector LaRue The Huckster LaRue will try to perform some wicked magic ritual over Salcedo. Coming out from the black heart of New Orleans, he’s told to have learned more Voodoo tricks than Ju Jitsu moves. Salcedo lost some of his confidence after a couple of bad outcomes, while LaRue benefited from the generous offer of a free morale boost made by Karelin, who barely opposed some weak resistance in his last fight. I think LaRue is the best fighter tonight, but Salcedo is not the guy to give up easily. He will give battle until his last tooth drops to the ground. LaRue has to fight to his level and not underestimate anything if he wants to confirm with practice the verdict given by theory. Prediction: LARue by KO. 4th Fight: Harry Balls vs Tiger Jones One of the more dangerous bad attitudes in the whole fight scene, Tiger Jones, face one of the sages in Syn, Harry Balls. Now, confront these guys: their look and features. The hard, evil expression of Tiger and the calm, polite manners of Harry. Like Hagler and Leonard long ago, like the monster Mike Tyson and the Reverend Evander Holyfield, these two guys carry on the ancient, eternal battle of good against evil. Who will prevail? A man who is terrifying against one who fears no one. Odds are even in this star collision, but I’d put something on Balls, especially if he manages to exploit Jones’s hidden fault: those genes which betrayed him giving him steely hands and granite chin, but a rice paper skin… Prediction: Balls by TKO. 5th Fight: Rock Johnson vs Jarkko Jyrays Jyrays trying to confirm the great impression he left on observers in his Syn debut and establish himself as brand new Syn rising star. In order to achieve this task, he has to defeat Rock Johnson, and this, let me tell you, is not the easiest mission to accomplish. Johnson is quite a complete martial artist with good standup and dangerous ground game either. That stated, Jyrays lost just twice in his career. One of the guys who can claim to have beaten him is Vendetta Phenomenon Cee Digits. The other one, Vitor Gustav, is now teaching theory and practice of Zen gardening at the Columbia University. When asked by a journalist about how to defeat Jyrays, he answered: “put flowers in your cannons”. Not the best advice ever. Will it be enough for Johnson? Prediction: Jyrays by decision. 6th Fight: Ace Ventura vs Tyke Mison Probably the finest tactician in whole Syn, Ace Ventura steps in the cage determined to put another pearl in his own collier, winning again in this well balanced contest against the newly discovered spiritual warrior. For the ones among you who don’t know the story… fuck you! How could you ignore a monstrous event like Times Up, reported by the best writer from the times of Dante Alighieri?! Go back to school kids! Anyway, just because I am a nice person (and just since I will get killed if I don’t) I am going to resume the facts: 1. Three months before Times Up, Mison had a vision: he was eating from a can. 2. He then discovered it was a flash forward, when the brutal head kick of his opponent sent him to ICU for some urgent treatment. 3. After that mystical half life experience, he discovered a spiritual inclination in his complex personality, and studied under the guide of a Chiripawa Shaman named Johnny Twelvesnakes. Now, he’s back with all his mystical power to give battle. He’s quite changed since the start, turning from this: http://www.mmatycoon.com/fighterprofilepublic.php?FID=15042 to this: Now, Ventura is a more prosaic, rational fighter: his blood is so cold that when he gets cut penguins start shivering. Question is: can his clever tactics and smart tricks harness the immense power hidden in Mison hands and force a pure finisher like him to explore the unfamiliar territories of the last round? I think that “WHEN”, in this fight, means “WHO”: if it turns into a pure blow for blow battle, it will be solved quickly and I think Mison will prevail. If it becomes a chess game, with minds confronting in a more complicated way, then I think that Mison will find himself caught in a maze he will not get out of. A hard prediction, but I’d bet on Tyke. Prediction: Mison by KO. Or Ventura by decision. 7th Fight: Lorenzo Gionathan vs Talafua Toluao And now the first of these four main events: the Iron Golem with the heart of an antelope, the man who collected more title belts than George W. Bush Junior collected wars: Lorenzo Gionathan, faces a rude contender like Talafua Toluao. Now, on a technical basis, there is little match: Toluao is a promising up and comer, Gionathan is the ultimate warrior: where Toluao is good, Gionathan is perfect. Lorenzo’s only worry, approaching tonight’s fight, seems to reside in the cutting power of those elbows thrown by his opponent, which made more than a victim. Toluao’s arms are sabers, and they want to drink some blue blood tonight. Now, Gionathan is no fool, and has prepared to this fight with maniacal care. He chose a sparring partner able to simulate the danger he will find himself into facing Toluao in this contest. Here’ s the guy preparing for the sparring session: Great move Lorenzo! Prediction: Gionathan by decision. 8th Fight: Johnny Rose vs Aaron Gracie Will hunger count? Will that sense of void you feel inside your guts be like gold at the bank of Hell? These are the questions spinning in the mind of Aaron Gracie approaching this fight. Or, at least, these would be the questions if he had a mind as sharp and brilliant as mine is… Actually, Gracie is a great fighter. My cousins there at Gracie Academy don’t give away their black belts with the same ease with which Paris Hilton gives away her… virtue. But, if I have to be honest, Johnny Rose is simply a step higher on the human evolution scale. Aaron’s only hope to walk away with this is hunger. Sure, because Rose is in that moment of his life when he achieved all tasks. He won all titles he competed for. He defeated the thoughest enemies. He also was able to gain revenge over the only man alive who can claim to have beaten him:Johnny Cage (exception made for Reverend Luther McKenzie, who used to hit him hard with a walking can when he tried to talk dirty at the age of 10. And, another exception, his girlfriend who always defeats him on PS3 UFC Undisputed). Now, is there any room left in his heart and soul for another mission? Of course Aaron Gracie hopes it’s not like that. He hopes to catch Johnny off guard and take him to the ground, and maybe score some quick submission before being eaten alive. It’s said that when Alexander the Great finally looked at the infinite horizon of the lands he conquered, he cried, since there was nothing left to strive for. Will Rose cry his tears tonight? Prediction: Rose by TKO. 9th Fight: Led Zeppelin vs Jesus Cavalera Time for a bloody rematch. The man who forced the Carnivore to eat carrots and tomatoes is back, ready to give his opponent a chance to take back his own pride. Last time Cavalera fairly acknowledged his opponent’s supremacy, but, like the real Champ he actually is, he swore to take vengeance as soon as possible. In his infinite cruelty, Avon Barksdale made that “soon” become “now”, and here we are again. Two days before the fight, Jesus sent a message to his own foe: It’s been a long time since I was the best It’s been a long time since I got my belt. Ooh, let me get it back, let me get it back, Let me get it back, baby, where I deserve. Its been a long time, been a long time, Been a long lonely, lonely, lonely, lonely, lonely time. Led answered this way: Hey hey Jesus no matter how you move, Gon' punch you bad, gonna kick you too. Ah-ah child I’m going to shake that thing, Gon' make you cry, gon' make you plead. Well, these two guys love each other, nothing to say about it. How’s it going to end? Last time I predicted Cavalera’s win. Why? Because I am a coward and did not want to be eaten alive by the carnivore. Anyway, I spoke with Led after his victory and he promised he will protect me if he tries to bite. So I can now proudly announce that Led Zeppelin will clearly walk away with a victory tonight. He’s by far the best fighter on his feet, and can competently defend on the ground. No chance he will lose tonight. Prediction: Zeppelin by decision. Yes, I know, sometimes I can be a real bastard… 10th Fight: Jigoro Kane vs Kenj Silva And now, main event among main events, legend among legends, ladies, gentlemen, gangsters and, of course, Wilhelmina… The best fighter in MMA history, the Right Hand of the Devil, Jigoro Kane, steps in to defend his own title against “The Spider” Kenji Silva. Now, what can happen when this guy Meets his guy? Lots of violence, I tell you. Like many of you remember, this is a rematch: Kane already defeated Silva in Syn 150. From that moment on, he probably faced the more difficult moment in his whole, outstanding career. Defeated by Okoro in the monster event Last Shooting Star, he found himself circled by a bloodthirsty pack of detractors, smelling the scent of his noble blood, ready to state he was gone, an ex champ, a name which survived the fighter behind it. Well, he gave his answer by the only means he knows: his deadly strikes. Now he’s back to his level, and this is probably the worst moment ever to face him: his perfect conditioning and technique is accompanied by an unexhausted rage: this guy won’t stop until all his foes are bleeding on the ground. Tonight it’s Silva’s turn, again. Kenji studied and improved since last time they met. He won a couple of great fights, and gsined confidence. That stated, I think there are still a couple of degrees of pure class between Jigoro and his challenger. Sure it will be a battle, and sure Kemji will not surrender until he has tried every move, and every trick. But, when the last shot is fired and the last spell is cast, I think Kane will still be the Champ. Prediction: Kane by decision. Now it’s really over. I think this could be the greatest card ever, ready to launch Syn to heights never touched before, Asgaard is the limit. And, oh, Wilhelmina said that she will make a nighttime visit to Jigoro Kane if he wins tonight. this gives Silva some hopes... Goodnight, Nilmar. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avon Posted March 6, 2011 Report Share Posted March 6, 2011 Event Commentary Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eveas Posted March 7, 2011 Report Share Posted March 7, 2011 Event Commentary These videos are insane. How is an org like mine supposed to compete with that? Great work. That event is going to be off the hook. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 7, 2011 Report Share Posted March 7, 2011 Damn Barksdale, those are quite something. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 7, 2011 Report Share Posted March 7, 2011 The videos deserve their own thread in the main forum IMO. I don't think very many people are getting to see them in this thread. It would be nice though if they were published a tad bit sooner. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avon Posted March 11, 2011 Report Share Posted March 11, 2011 Syn' 163: Moi Want Moah – Bruce Springsteen's wisdom Poor men waanna be rich, Rich men wanna be kings, And a king ain’t satisfied till he rules everything… Immortal words by the Boss, Bruce Springsteen, who knows about life and death more than philosophers and theologists… Well, this was not the night. This was not the night when everything changed. This was not a revolution. This was not the time when an evil spell perverted the natural flow of things. Kings stayed kings, rich men stayed rich, and the poor ones were screwed. That’s how it goes, and this is how I’ll tell this tale. 1st Fight: Tommy Gun vs Ronald McDonald McDonald going 2-0 against Tommy Gun and this might be the D-E-F-I-N-I-T-E word on it. Now, I have to reveal the sad sad story of these two guys. Actually, they’re twins, sons to the same mother, a McDonald’s waitress named Wendy, and two different fathers. Tommy is the son of Peter Gunn, whose only remarkable quality is being namesake to the famous blues instrumental. Ronald is son to Ozzy Osbourne, and grew up eating living bats and stuff like that. Now, Tommy has always been the diligent, scrupulous child, while Ronald is the punk, rebel, iconoclastic one. What? Did anybody say Jacob and Smokey? Well, I would not put the blame on you. Anyway, crime pays sometimes, especially in Syn City, and the evil twin wins again over the good one. Will there ever be another chance for Tommy? 2nd Fight: Gundar Thorsen vs Aleksandr Karelin Now it’s clear: Karelin is a mummy. What to say about a fighter who does four things in the whole fight? He had to bring the fight down the ground to win, we know it. Well, he attempted but two takedowns, and botched both of them. Now, Thorsen has the only fault not to have closed this one earlier, letting the things into the precarious hands of the Judges after completely dominating from first second to the last one but, as he explained in the post event interview, he was just waiting for Brendan Frazier to step in and finish it in a cinematic way… 3rd Fight: Omar Salcedo vs Hector LaRue What a display of control, intelligence, skills and power by LaRue! He dominated the whole fight, changing levels when he wanted to, taking the best from the standup part of the game as well as from the grappling one. Sure, the bad cut occurred in the early stages of round one scared Salcedo to the point he was forced completely out of his fight plan, nonetheless, LaRue showed perfect timing and fight sensitiveness, always knowing when it was time to wait, and when it was time for some reckless action either. Judges were ready to give a clear verdict in favor of LaRue, but he did not want to wait that long: his hands like blade finished the job started in round one, and the doctor finally had to step in and prevent Salcedo’s bleeding death. 4th Fight: Harry Balls vs Tiger Jones When this fight was over, all the people in the front rows looked like Balls: a long, white beard grew up on their faces. Half of them was asleep. The other half was enjoying heavy drugs, singing songs from the Doors’ Celebration of the Lizard /(you might ask how can someone sing something from that album. Well, take 5-6 LSD pills, mix them with some brown sugar, add some crack and you will find out…). Am I saying it was not an exciting fight? Not really. I am stating that I’d prefer a trip on the Love Boat with Wilhelmina than having to watch this thing again! anyway, Balls (nomen omen…) won the battle (!). if you want a shot to the more exciting moment of the match, well, don’t say I’m not generous: 5th Fight: Rock Johnson vs Jarkko Jyrays Rock Johnson performing the first upset of the night, defeating the rising star Jyrays and adding another pearl to an already honorable career. Sometimes wisdom is heavier than talent in the table of elements, especially when some educated instinct can make the difference between walking away on your legs and enjoying a magical mystery tour on the ambulance. Jyrays strategy of bringing the fight in the clinch was read competently by his opponent, who adopted good counter measures, escaping as elusive as Houdini in a water pool. Jyrays fight plan become more predictable from time to time, while Johnson surprised his opponent with a flashy takedown in round one, and was able to perfectly control the ground and impress the Judges. Third round started with Jyrays unnerved and completely gassed, while Johnson’s eye was as pure as that of a child while he stepped in for the final exchange. He dominated also from distance and was righteously rewarded with an undisputed victory. 6th Fight: Ace Ventura vs Tyke Mison This fight was in the hands of Chronos, the ancient God who dominates the secret flows of time. Mison would have surely won a short battle, while Ventura would have taken advantage from a long one. Well, the capricious God decided to have a long time for this fight, so it happened that Mison found himself harnessed and restrained.Ventura takedowns were simply unstoppable, and his rhythm on the ground was too high for his opponent: he was so worried trying to escape all those tight sub attempts that he never was given a chance to try some strike back. An easy job done for the Judges giving this one to Ace. 7th Fight: Lorenzo Gionathan vs Talafua Toluao Well, you know how they say: who lives by the sword, dies by the sword. Toluao gained more than one unexpected victory by the means of his evil elbows, cutting through the other guy’s skin with cruel efficiency. Now, this is how it ended: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4J1wUPIM9z4&feature=related Gionathan proved to be a complete fighter, able to move all his mass with blinding speed, floating like a ghost while defending and hitting like a lightning when given the chance. No distance, and no stance, is unfamiliar for this outstanding warrior. Toluao did what he had to do to stay in the match as long as he could, but finally he was betrayed by his long time ally: the doctor, who stepped in to make his dreams fade away. 8th Fight: Johnny Rose vs Aaron Gracie Johnny Rose cried all his melancholy after this fight. Nothing left to conquer, nothing left to prove: there is a ceiling in this profession, and Johnny did not simply touch it: he completely pierced through it and reached the skies above, where everything looks small and worthless. The fight has been quite an exciting one, with Gracie teaching some lesson about ground control in round one. The fight was at high risk of early ending, with some sub attempt which looked quite definitive from my point of view, but Rose survived. Round two was a perfect counter attack: a shoulder strike from Rose almost sent Gracie to the Hunting Grounds, but, again, these two showed the heart of lion kings, trading blows without surrendering. Anyway, from that moment on, Gracie was scared, unable to carry in the fight the reckless, brave attitude that was so rewarding in the first round. The battle turned into a psychological one, with more study and tactics. Rose was waiting for nothing else, showing all his class keeping the fight standing and neutralizing his opponent’s best weapon. Now, Johnny The Great trespassed his last obstacle for eternal glory, leaving the familiar land of History for the mysterious territories of Legend. He did it with a tear, like The Crying Freeman, but who will step up to the challenge and try to bring him back to human dimension? 9th Fight: Led Zeppelin vs Jesus Cavalera The Carnivore was unable to bite tonight. if possible, Zeppelin’s superiority was more evident in this rematch than it was before, Led did not leave his opponent a single round, winning the fight piece by piece. Cut bad and almost KOed in the first round, Jesus had no other choice than trying to defend from the storm to finish the fight on his feet. Must have been sad somehow for a natural born winner and a true Champ like Cavalera, fighting every minute of this fight knowing that the final goal was not winning, but mere survival. He fought to save his own pride more than to take back his belt. He clearly recognized the superior class and talent of his opponent, and tried his best not to be completely overwhelmed by it. Despite his loss, I feel I have to give an applause to Cavalera, who proved to be a real fighter right in the night he fell down. You have to be a Champ to win some fights, but you have to be even a greater one to lose some others without losing your face. Now, the division has a new emperor, who launched his glove in the face of everyone around. Who will take it? 10th Fight: Jigoro Kane vs Kenj Silva And The King stayed King. Jigoro Kane won this fight using his own body like an orchestra to play a magnificent crescendo: he lost the first round, probably won the second, took the third one, dominated the fourth one and won the last one hands down. After a promising start, where he scared the champ, cutting his skin and somehow piercing through his spiritual armor, Silva progressively disappeared from the fight, as transitory as a circle in the sand when the tide arises. The tide had a name tonight, it was Jigoro, and the waves of his fists turned into a Tsunami as time passed. Kane played his symphony of broken bones in C minor, and it sounded like a Requiem to Silva’s ears. If any concern was left about Jigoro after his recent loss, it’s definitely gone. The King is back for sure, and, like The Boss says, he won’t be satisfied until he rules everything. What monstrous task do we have to expect from this guy now? And it’s over. The night where nothing changed comes to an end, like everything in human life (exception made for Wilhelmina’s lust, but I said “human”, so everything is alright). Let’s see what comes next in Syn City. I’ll be here to tell. Maybe. Goodnight, Nilmar. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avon Posted March 11, 2011 Report Share Posted March 11, 2011 Thanks for the comments on the vids Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avon Posted March 14, 2011 Report Share Posted March 14, 2011 Event Commentary Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avon Posted March 14, 2011 Report Share Posted March 14, 2011 Syn' 164: Oil and Water - Battle for Honor and other minor stuff (like Bokhari and KillsInWater fighting each other...) Things in life you can never understand: 1. How low human race has fell down, to have someone winning a Nobel Prize for Peace just because he did not wage a war yet? 2. How is it possible that peaceful, enlightened guys like Avon Barksdale and Calvin Broadus still haven’t won the Nobel, on that basis? 3. Why damn do I feel encouraged to start every Syn preview with some bullshit about life and death, instead of sticking to fight night? Am I convinced that someone finds this strange habit charming? Well, Wilhelmina does… But, above all, the question of questions: WHO DAMN CHOOSES SYN TITLES?!? I swear I’ve been writing for them such a long time and never understood what the fuck Moi, Moah, Illuminati, Oil etc mean! OK, just my fault. Let’s go to the fights and stop complaining. A very particular night awaits: 11 fights, with a special main event. Yes, you read it correctly… someone among you did, at least… E-L-E-V-E-N fights, glory, pride and some belt on the line. Let’s take a look! 1st Fight: Bob Stroker vs Solomon Carver Time to shine again for Bob Stroker? Or is his star definitely gone, swallowed by the dark skies above Syn City (damn, how am I poetic! No surprise at all that your ladies all want to get laid by me…)? Solomon Carver is the right man to give an answer. Well, maybe Solomon Kane would have been even better, but he was very hard to sign in… Both guys are competent on the ground, but give their best while standing: Stroker is probably one of the more complete strikers in Syn, able to use his footwork to indifferently switch from philly shell defense to Muay Thai front guard, thus making his artillery quite unpredictable. Carver’s punches, on the other side, are so educated that his left jab actually teaches Superstrings Theory at the Columbia University. How’s it going to end? Stroker needs a victory not to sink into mediocrity. Carver needs it to go on with his winning streak and keep on dreaming of one last title chance in his career. Different motivations, the same goal… Prediction: Carver by decision. 2nd Fight: Che Satomi vs Hiroshi Hatayama Two BJJ specialists are to roll glued to each other in a dramatic “My Kung Fu is Superior” contest. Satomi is a submission purist who paid big tributes to his mono-dimensional game plan, but still can win every fight in a flash due to his monstrous submission skills. Hatayama is a more complete fighter, who can use his Ju Jitsu to control the fight more than to finish it, and likes striking more than his opponent. A close fight, but I’d give some credit to Hatayama. If he survives first round, of course… Prediction: Hatayama by decision. 3rd Fight: Maxwell Smart vs Fabricio Valesquez Smart has to forget the nightmare called Mala Ika (he should have a five minutes round with Wilhelmina to fully understand what a nightmare is if you want my opinion…). Tonight he faces Fabricio Valesquez, and here his Nilamr’s first scoop of the night. After a long search, some money delivered to the right hands, some kick delivered to the right asses, I discovered Valequez’s true, secret identity… and here it is: Smart has to thank and take the kind present, enjoying the morale boost for this announced victory. Prediction: I would bet my girlfriend’s next orgasm on Smart’s victory by TKO but, since my actual girlfriend is Wilhelmina, I have not the heart to do this to you my friends, so let’s say I bet YOUR girlfriend’s next orgasm… 4th Fight: Junius E Sneed IV vs Ramses Roberts Oh my friends, how I love this game! You can find everything in an ordinary night of violence like this, so you have Prince’s secret son facing a guy who really believes he’s an ancient Pharaoh coming back from the mists of time. One has to hide his true identity to fight, the other guy does not even remember what his true identity is. One chose this career against the opinion of his father, who wanted him to play drums, the other guys fights against the opinion of his psychiatrist, who would like him to take his medicine regularly. Who has the best aces in his hole? Roberts looks superior at first sight, but it’s still unclear if he recovered from the recent double KO he suffered from Jones and Fwapps. About this fight, I interviewed his coach, and here is the more significant part: “Is it hard to train Roberts?”. “Damn hard?”. “Is it due to his low morale?”. “Fuck Nilmar, he does not even know what a low morale is. He’s convinced he’s the Emperor of ancient Egypt!”. “So what?”. “He forces us all to walk profile all day. If we ever try to walk straight he says we’re not realistic!”. Well, life is hard my friends. I still think Roberts is favorite tonight. at least, if he remembers which planet he lives in… Prediction: Roberts by decision. 5th Fight: Bill Carson vs Xavier McPherson Bill Carson will try to win and go definitely out of his bad moment. Tonight he faces Xavier McPherson, which is probably the more unstable personality in whole Syn. A single loss is able to throw him deep into depression, and it recently happened, so putting at serious risk his chances in tonight fight. On a technical basis, he would be able to fight quite even with his opponent: equal, if not superior on the feet, he has something less on the ground but his sprawl is quite good so he’s able to defend himself. Nonetheless, his psyche is wounded and he has to find a cure if he wants to win. He underwent analysis for it, and the outcome was very weird: all his losses bring Xavier back to his primal trauma, when he was something like 10 years old, and every time he answered the phone the voices on the other side asked: “Is your sister Elle home?”. The trauma of knowing nobody wanted him, but everyone wanted to screw his sister, damaged his EGO and now this is the final result. Hope he gets out of his Oedipus in time for the first round bell, or he will be in trouble. Prediction: Carson by decision. 6th Fight: Damien Demented vs Shin Nara Demented faces Shin Nara in this fascinating undercard: Nara recently had his undefeated ass kicked for good by Tor Nansen, and immediately needs a win to start again from where he was interrupted. Future is on his side, and he kows it, but he wants future to start right now. Demented is still enjoying some celebration after defeating The Dude in what looked quite a nice upset. On a technical basis, Demented looks like he can play equal to Nara on his feet, but is at high risk of being victimized by his opponent’s more unpredictable fight style. You never know when Nara is to put one of his deadly Harai Goshi from the Judo skills he learned at Tokyo Kodokan, and, if it ever comes to the ground, Demented could be doomed. Prediction: Nara by submission. 7th Fight: Blokada Leningrada vs Collin Glorious Leningrada is probably the best Sambo specialist in Vegas, but has to get out of quicksand soon or he will soon be overwhelmed by the tide of talented up and comers that every day crashes against Syn City with terrifying force. It’s not the best moment ever for Russian fighters in Avon Barksdale’s org, and Leningrada is called to some blaze of pride for himself and his nation. To add some spice to this dish, some of you might remember it’s a rematch: these two met once before, and the verdict rewarded Glorious in an unclear way. A split decision that arose many debates and lots of us always wondered what really happened into the Judges reserved room during that difficult decision. Well, that’s how it went that time: Now glorious is called to dissipate concerns about his previous win, and I think that, by the way he improved, he should be able to do it, also exploiting Blokada’s bad shape. Winning tonight, Glorious would perform two tasks: kick Leningrada definitely out of the thick of things, and possibly find some room for himself. The monstrous Superman Punch that put the final word on his EFC adventure gained him lots of fans even among the more exigent MMA fine tastes. He’s back in Syn now and, if he manages to give continuity to it, Sky would be the limit. Prediction: Glorious by TKO. 8th Fight: Henrick Larsson vs Bancroft Rothschild Rotschild black sheep faces Henrick Larsson for pride, glory, tons of money and a little amount of parental love. Yes, because voices spread among the circuit that Bancroft’s dad, Herminius Ganimedes Rotschild, is becoming a true MMA passionate since his kid started fighting. He has to watch his son’s fights undercover and is at high risk of some marital crisis since his wife suspects he wakes up in the middle of the night to watch porn movies. Anyway, Herminius finally made up his mind and bought two tickets for tonight show. If Bancroft win, the heart of his mom will possibly open up again for him. Aren’t you moved? Fuck your stone heart, some true feelings here! Anyway, beating Larsson looks all but easy. He’s looking for another title shot and will do all he can to steamroll his opponent tonight. Fight is quite even, and Bancroft will have to fight much better than he did last time against my 10th cousin Aaron if he wants to win. He still has a little something more in the overall so he could do it. Prediction: Rothschild by decision. Now don’t say I’m not the romantic kind… 9th Fight: Bro Lee vs Tor Nansen And now, this is the fight for the Lightweight title. It would be weird everywhere to see a title match as a co-main event. If you then consider that, due to the monstrous eleventh fight added last minute to the card, it became the last of undercards, you can well be shocked! The Champ Bro Lee is probably the best Muay Thai specialist of the division and, after his loss by split decision occurred in the Sumerian age, he is enjoying an endless winning streak. Will Nansen be able to stop it? This is clearly a fight where the one able to dictate the conditions of the fight will take him home. Listen, I am not saying Nansen is unable to defend himself in a standup battle, but he simply can’t withstand 5 rounds of K-1 rules against such a pure striking talent. On the other hand, while quite competent on the ground, Lee would not survive a Brazilian Ju Jitsu fight against a hitman like Nansen. It means that wrestling skills will be the core contest of the fight. Should Lee’s sprawl prevail over Nansen’s takedowns he will probably manage to win, otherwise he would be doomed. I would not enjoy too much clinch if I were Lee anyway: sure he’s a deadly clincher, but Nansen could turn this weapon against him by pulling guard. A very uncertain outcome, but I’d put a penny on the challenger. Prediction: Nansen by decision. 10th Fight: Abayo Bokhari vs Bubba KillsInWater And now, the co-main event: undefeated Syn dominator Abayo Bokhary meets AFC living legend Bubba KillsInWater in this monstrous superfight. Now, we all know about Bokhari. His immense disruptive power, his charming boxing technique, and, above all, his supernatural quickness. One of his former classmates swears that once Abayo went out on a rainy day and when he came back he was completely dry since he had been able to dodge raindrops. Believe it or not, it happened many times we had to look at the replay to see how he KOed his opponent. KillsInWater is a different kind of fighter, mostly relying on his constant, unexhausted rhythm to take down his opponents. His cardio frequency is so low you can read “The Lord of The Rings” saga between one heartbeat and another, so when it goes to long fights he takes clear advantage. On a technical basis, we’re talking about two monster fighters and it’s very hard to make differences. It looks like Bubba has a slight edge in the striking ability, but this fight will not be decided by a week of training more or less: nerves, will and innate talent for killing human beings will be the definite keys to victory tonight. who possesses the most of them? Prediction: Bokhari by decision. 11th Fight: special wild card – Battle for Honor And now, the event you were all waiting for! Main dish of this spicy card! A single round with no time limit, stomps and head butts allowed, the only rule is there are no rules and may the worst human being win. This guy http://www.mmatycoon.com/managerprofilemanager.php?MgrID=617 meets this guy http://www.mmatycoon.com/managerprofilemanager.php?MgrID=1170 for the absolute and definite possession of this prize http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/nonciclopedia/images/thumb/e/e5/Vecchia_orrenda.jpg/200px-Vecchia_orrenda.jpg Now, this is clearly an uncertain fight: Barksdale has the best revolver, but Broadus has a good beretta parabellum and could strike from distance. In addition, he could stun his opponent having Kathy Perry sing some California Gurls shit and it could be the end of the fight. But, if Barksdale manages to close the gap and have his opponent smell the white singlet he never changed this year, he could gain a chemical TKO. I think I should bet on Avon. After all, his honor is on the line. Also consider he’s the one who pays me. Prediction: Barksdale by 45 caliber hollow point bullet. Well, this monstrous card is at its end. Of course I don’t give a damn about Bokhari, Nansen, Lee and all the undercard guys. Me and Wilhelmina are chilled by the main event… Goodnight, Nilmar. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 14, 2011 Report Share Posted March 14, 2011 glad my shin nara proved tonight he belongs in this org. he'll slowly climb the ranks only to get crushed by nansen again tho =p Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 14, 2011 Report Share Posted March 14, 2011 Thanks for the comments on the vids OK I hate these vids! Why? Tell you soon: they are so amazing that nobody cares about my writeups. by the look of things I will be fired (or killed) soon... Fuck your sick talent! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avon Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 Syn' 164: Oil & Water - The battle for Wilhelmina comes to an end... maybe. Well, time to tell the tale of this night. I am terribly late but, as you will discover in the next pages, there is a reason for it so I hope you don’t put the blame on poor Nilmar. I know none of you really cares about Stroker, Smart, Nara, Lee, Bokhari etc, we all want to know about Calvin and Avon. But, you know, I am a writer, and I will do my duty till the end. So prepare and let’s get into details of this monstrous night. In the end, the battle for Wilhelmina will find its end, but I already have to say it is an unexpected one… 1st Fight: Bob Stroker vs Solomon Carver A kick in the head may be quite continental, But diamonds are a girl’s best friends! What a dramatic ending for a fight that I predicted as exciting as a bridge game in the Monday Evening Protestant Housewives Club. It proves a couple of things: 1. You don’t really need a gameplan if you have a laser rifle in your leg. 2. Solomon Carver’s striking defense is not Solomon Kane’s striking defense, but you can’t put the blame on carver, since he has no supernatural help. 3. Nilmar is a shitty predictor. Now, Stroker comes in with a victory that rescues him from the grave, while Carver has to go back in the gym and work hard if he wants to have some chance. 2nd Fight: Che Satomi vs Hiroshi Hatayama Well, after ten minutes of rolling on the canvas, with these two guys glued to each other and on one able to understand if some blow was delivered, all we in the front rows started having one terrible suspect: WHERE THESE TWO HAVING SEX!?!?!?! Now, I am sure that, if a back mount had occurred, no other doubt could have been allowed but, anyway, not everything was clear in the transitions between guard and half guard. Anyway, the kids must have understood that this was directing towards some Brokeback Mountain main scene, rather than a cage fight, so they picked up the pace a bit in round three, and, most of all, stayed away from each other. Decision hasn’t been easy with such a demonstration of love taking place, anyway, Hatayama deserved it. Here is a shot of the two exchanging compliments soon after the fight. Something good started? 3rd Fight: Maxwell Smart vs Fabricio Valesquez Take him down and hurt him bad. This was Maxwell Smart’s fight plan at the start of round one and, it has to be said, he did stick to it with singular dedication and coherency. Round one was turned into a weird game: the more Valesquez stood up, the more Smart took him down. Valesquez was already gassed out before the start and it did not take long before the fact was clearly evident to everyone. He made it to round two, anyway, just to be finished by a beautiful Kimura. Some say that Smart jumped up and started running all over the place, shouting his lover’s voice loud. Adriaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa? No, of course: “Wilhelmiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!”. 4th Fight: Junius E Sneed IV vs Ramses Roberts After pleasing the crowd with the fine choice of his entrance music… … Roberts was almost killed by Sneed’s right hook. It’s been a short fight, completely dominated in every aspect by Prince’s secret son, who has been able to choose the distance he wanted, and to take profit from that. Roberts struggled to get out of the clinch, and finally managed to, just to be annihilated, some seconds later, by a big punch which will probably fill sports magazines’ main pages for a while… 5th Fight: Bill Carson vs Xavier McPherson Now, everything could have been different if Xavier McPherson did not receive a “for your eyes only” letter, containing documents and some photographs… of what? Of his beloved sister Elle having a date with Carson at high school. Worst of all, there was a pic of her gaining full mount over Carson in a parking lot. It did not look like she was eager to go for a Kimura… Then Xavier stepped in with his own Oedipus turned into a black, assassin rage! He completely dominated every single round and destroyed his opponent in the clinch and on the ground as well. There was no place to hide for Carson. After hearing the Judges’ decision, McPherson faced his foe, who was trying to regain the use of word, stared at him with hate and said: “next time fuck your own sister, Casanova…”. 6th Fight: Damien Demented vs Shin Nara Demented wanted to clinch, Nara wanted to win the fight. Shin Nara’s pure talent has been the factor in this fight: he had not to worry about preventing his opponent from applying his strategy. He simply accepted it and turned it like a boomerang against his opponent. Demented was confused, seeing his best weapon going completely ineffective, and also was righteously scared by the cut on his right eyebrow, caused by an early strike from Nara. So we have to say Demented did not fight at his best tonight, but this has to be completely considered Nara’s merit. Not an exciting fight, but Nara showed tons of class in this fight and we surely know he will give more to the crowd when given the chance. 7th Fight: Blokada Leningrada vs Collin Glorious Leningrada knew that he probably was not able to win the fight, but wanted to stay on his feet and achieved the goal. K-1 rules for these guys, and we have to be honest stating that Leningrada did not really go out of the match: he did his thing, and was moderately successful with his good boxing but, in the end, has been victimized by his mono-dimensional striking style: he uses his feet just to step out of the taxi, and, against a complete martial artist like Glorious, able to land 32 kicks, it’s been the main fault. Maybe it’s too late to expect some radical changes in Blokada’s fight stile, but sure he has to tighten his kicking ability a bit. At least. 8th Fight: Henrick Larsson vs Bancroft Rothschild What a catastrophe for Rotschild family, when Helena reluctantly sat down in the front row just to witness her beloved child’s massacre. She asked for divorce soon after leaving the arena. Bancroft has to bring his excuses to his dad for running his marriage, and maybe should reconsider his father’s kind offer of a position of responsibility at a group’s bank branch. Power has played the key role in this fight: skills were equal, and maybe Rotschild even had something more but the point is: when you hit, you have to hurt the other guy. Larsson was able to hurt Rotschild bad: first with his kick and then with his fist. Rotschild was not allowed to land with a single strike. He simply went down, stood up, went down again once for all. What will be of Rotschild family now that the black sheep has been sheared? 9th Fight: Bro Lee vs Tor Nansen A fight where most of the main things happened under the surface. The crowd hasn’t been pleased, but these two respected, and feared each other too much to go reckless. And they were right. After a blinding start where he looked to have put his hands on the whole fight, Lee had to experience the fury of Nansen, who had a blaze of pride and jumped right into the fight again, equalizing odds and forcing all bookmakers to wait before giving him losing. With Lee having dominated rounds one and two, and Nansen able to get rounds three and four, the last one promised to be a battle. Suspense grew up as seconds passed. Lee was able to fight on the fight for half the round, imposing his idea on the fight, but Nansen managed to score with a takedown right when second half of the round was starting. The two guys rolled on the ground with no one able to land anything, but when the fight was nearly over Nansen managed to set up an Americana. All people in the arena had a gasp. Was it the finishing move? Lee turned himself into a modern Houdini, and slipped away from the trap, finally gaining a contended, yet deserved victory. This is the kind of match you have to expect when two experienced champs face each other with a belt up for grab… 10th Fight: Abayo Bokhari vs Bubba KillsInWater How to describe the end of a legend. How does it feel when something intended to last forever finally breaks? How to put in words the sense of emptiness of a God discovering himself to be only human at last? KillsInWater defeats Abayo Bokhari, and the day that nobody was thinking of finally happened. It has to be said, though, that KillsInWater proved to be superior. Hard to say it without appearing funny, but Bokhari lacked killer instinct. After dominating round one, Bokhari almost killed Bubba with one of his feared head kicks. Then something happened. Something I would never have expected from him: he was scared. Instead of diving into the ground and taking the chance for a major finish, he stood up, waiting, not completely trusting his own ground game. Weird, for a fighter of this level. Bubba used that time to recover and set up his fight strategy. He soon answered, knocking down his opponent and scaring him even more. The fight had changed route. From that moment on, Bokhari slowly disappeared from the fight. KIW gained even more confidence and scored an impressive amount of strikes. Intimidated by Bubba’s barrage of punches, and kicks targeting every area, Bokhari tried to defend but finally had to bow his head down and acknowledge his opponent’s deserved victory. This has clearly been the fight of the night. Or, to be clear, it would have been should have fight night ended at this point. But, you all know, something more is expecting us... 11th Fight: special wild card – Battle for Honor What a fight my friend. The whole world stopped like the center of Beijing during the Tai Chi time, when these two gangsters stepped in. Broadus was confident in his manners, singing and rapping while entering the cage, but the more sensitive and clever among us (let’s say Nilmar, to be short…) clearly saw the dark shade of guilt in the depth of his eyes. Barksdale was focused. Nothing flashy for the fans, he had his eyes on target. His white singlet shined like a razor’s blade in the night, and his muscles were very intimidating (also because he was pmping them with major effort…). Fight started, and soon Broadus took a hook to the temple. He tried to extract the gun, but a police dog jumped into the cage and delivered a bite to his hand. Barksdale tried to take profit from it and took his 357 magnum out, and shot targeting Broadus’s balls to punish him for good. Too bad, he was not able to find anyting. Goddamn hip hop fashion, those damn jeans were 7 sizes more than they should have been, and the bullet passed through meeting no resistance. Kathy stood up in the front row and started singing “daisy dukes bikinis on top!”. Barksdale was cut. His cornermen were about to throw in the towel but nobody would have survived the combo of singlet plus towel in the same place. Barksdale recovered, clinched up and had Calvin smell the chemical formula of his singlet. Doctor was about to intervene, but Kathy stopped him revealing an uncomfortable truth:”I kissed a girl, I liked it!”. Who damn cares?! Fight went over with the guys trading blows, dirty tricks and a couple of pills. Then, when both were a blood mask and energies were going down low, after 156 minutes of fight, they stared at each other. “I have been bad to you man” said Calvin. “You have been”. “I betrayed you. Should have known better than to cheat a friend”. God, was Calvin quoting George Michael? Really?!?!. “You should have”. “But I love you brotha. Can’t hurt you anymore”. And he started crying like a baby. “You’re a brother to me too, Calvin. You wounded my pride and ripped my heart wide open. But you’re still a brother. Come here”. Calvin went on his knees, and the two embraced. “I am sorry man”. “I forgive you”. Aren’t you moved? I was. Just for a while. What happened then stopped moving me, and suggested me to move. “Let’s do something funny together man” said Calvin. “Yeah, friends again” said Avon. “Something nasty”. “Something really really bad”. “Something bloody”. “You know what? Let’s kill that fucking Nilmar together!”. “I take the body, you take the head and then we dissolve him in acid together”. “Well, I’d rather prefer to tear him into pieces and send him to post offices all over the country, but we can talk about it”. And they went out of the cage hand in hand… Now, I have to run. Run. Run. See you guys. Maybe. Maybe not. Goodnight, Nilmar Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avon Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 Syn' 165: Democrazy - Preview Since Calvin and Avon discovered their friendship will never die and decided to write their own personal patriot act with my blood, I have been quite on the run. Finally I found some protection when I decided to ask for help to a fighter of my stable named Jason Bourne. The guy has an obscure past being a former US covert agent and hitman, so I thought it was a good idea to have a professional assassin defend me from two amateur killers. Great. Problem is: Jason has a memory disorder. A malicious form of amnesia. Sometimes he completely forgets who he is and starts thinking of himself as a hair dresser. So, to stay with him, I had to accept some compromise. Here’s my new look: http://www.modacheblog.it/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/anni-80-le-trib%C3%B9-II.jpg What to say: survival is the primal instinct of a mammal. Dignity, definitely, comes second. But get out of messy Nilmar’s private life and get into our dirty job of the night. Here we come with another night of mayhem. Barksdale put once again his antisocial disorder to profit and came out with another amazing card. Let’s take a look. 1st Fight: Vinny Veechi vs Sallah Alcoubrah An ancient Chinese quote says: the best fights are the ones you avoid. Why do I decide to start with this? First, to display my immense knowledge and get the nod on all ladies’ scorecard. Second, because both these guys have at least a couple of fight that they should have better managed to duck. They step in tonight to see who will be the first to get out of the bad moment and who will need some psychotherapy instead. Veechy looks favorite, especially for his dangerous ground game, which gives him some more ace to take out from the hole. Will it be enough? Prediction: Veechy by submission. 2nd Fight: Jorge Ramirez vs Jose Salcedo Another ancient Chinese quote states: let the wind and the rain get married, and they will give birth to a storm. What has this one to do with tonight’s matchup? I have no idea at all, but you have to admit it sounds quite cool. (Note from Nilmar Gracie’s Psychiatrist notebook: the subject is affected by a pervasive histrionic disorder, which often forces him to come out with statements made only to impress the listener, with no meaning at all. in his more acute episodes, he starts inventing ancient Chinese quotes that really do not exists. In these particular moment he’s very dangerous for himself and for the ones around him. Please contact Mental Health institutes if you witness episodes like that). One of the finest boxers in Syn, Jorge Ramirez, is to fight a dangerous BJJ specialist like Salcedo, and the one able to choose the battlefield will probably take it home. Ramirez clearly prefers the exact science of killing people via strikes, rather than the subtle art of subbing them by causing intolerable pain to their limbs but, while his technique is so pure and clean you could drink it, his fight plan hasn’t always been that perfect. This guy is an “all in” hand on legs: he goes for the knockout, always. If he gets it, he wins, otherwise he loses. A monodimensional fight plan which penalized him quite a lot in recent times. Salcedo is an insidious opponent, but should in the end pay some tribute to Ramirez’s superior striking. Prediction: Ramirez by TKO. 3rd Fight: Vladimir Arlovski vs Cadian Karskin Jr. A heavy handed hard hitter from Nexus makes his first step as a Syn fighter, and it looks like it could be a slippery one. Now, rumors spread about good Vladimir being more interested in taking cute girls’ virtue rather than winning fights, but, to be honest, he did fairly good in his previous Org. Will he be able to improve his record in the more competitive Org in the world (please note that when I am so hyperbolic I clearly try to ingratiate Avon in order to delay my execution, but the fact I am a coward does not make the statement any less true)? Carskin is angry and hungry: he got out of his personal quicksand and is now ready for some good challenge. Clearly Arlovski has something more on the feet, but is at high risk of being finished on the ground. Who will be able to impose his law on the fight? Well, if Vladimir botches his baptism as a fighter, he could well gain another kind of baptism. A hot, steamy one. I am sure you know what I’m talking about, but I am almost sure poor Vladimir does not. so please Vladimir, let your door open and a gorgeous female will surely step in to fulfill your dreams… Prediction: Arlovski by TKO. And Wilhelmina by multiple orgasm. 4th Fight: Frank Pembelton vs Lombardo Limba Another baptism by fire has to take place, since Brown Belt from PROUD FC, the “Detective” Frank Pembelton tastes the irony flavor of Syn meat against “The Zombie who thinks he’s a man” Lombardo Limba. Now, we all know Limba is not a living man, but an undead controlled by the evil means of a voodoo spell by his manager, Paul Keaton. Recently Keaton forgot to give some Coudeputro to the creature, and it ended up with limba defeated by Cristos. I don’t think Paul will make the same mistake twice, so I think there will be some George Romero stuff in the fight tonight. if it was necessary to have a detective investigating on the strange case of Lombardo Limba, this one would have been more appropriate: Prediction: Limba by decision. 5th Fight: Joel Bailey vs Justin Mayhem Lots of new faces in Syn City: debut for two in this undercard, with Joel Bailey trying to impose his mixed fight style, made of continuous level changes, over the pure boxing talent of Justin Mayhem. Mayhem’s jab is so clean you can sleep on it, and his right hook is like Snowhite’s apple: gorgeous to look at, poisonous when you taste it. That stated, Bailey has more than an evil magic ritual in his book of spells. He can win by submission, but has also good hands and a tactical sense that often allows him to be the teacher’s pet when it comes to Judges’ decision. A close matchup, would not waste my money betting on it. Prediction: Mayhem by KO. 6th Fight: Zedicus Jones vs Anders Jaerderoth The best three ways to lose a fight: 1. Schedule a match against Jigoro Kane (unless you’re Manu Okoro). 2. Schedule a match against Manu Okoro (unless you’re Jigoro Kane). 3. Drinking a bottle of Irish Whiskey every night in the week preceding the fight. Now, there was no chance for Jones to face Okoro or Kane at the present moment, but he had a very well furnished bar in return. So, if you see him dancing pointlessly back and forth tonight, he’s not trying any Drunken Kung Fu flashy move. He’s simply drunk. Despite all technical considerations one might want to do on how well balanced these two are in terms of skills, Anders has to win this fight or find a job as fortune teller on street corners. Prediction: Jaederoth by TKO. 7th Fight: Ernesto Bonjaski vs Jin Sen Now, Jin Sen was 17 years old when the Chinese quotes I wrote before were invented. He was already fighting when gunpowder did not exist and the lamps were alimented by oil. It means three things: 1. He’s an experienced fighter with lots of tactical wisdom. 2. Viagra furnishers consider him a respectable client. 3. He’s got incontinency issues. Tonight he faces Ernesto Bonjarski, whose loose life philosophy gained him lots of fans all over the world among the younger fans, and also gained his coach and manager a permanent need of psychotherapy to contain anxiety. Despite his weird manners, Ernesto is doing fairly good in recent times and he’s putting together a respectable record. That stated, if he wants some big chance for some huge main event, let’s say a title shot, he has to stay away from his favorite sparring partner, at least for a while: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vOMSmmRLjJI How’s it going to end? Well, Sen will probably try to finish before his vescica betrays him, but I think that if Bonjarski stays focused (which is the hardest part, considering his habits) he could prevail. Bonjaski by decision. Or Sen by anti-doping intervention. 8th Fight: Stevie Why vs Dante Evangelisti Undefeated Syn new sensation Dante Evangelisti steps into the cage against Steve Why, trying to increase his impressing winning streak: 6 fights, 6 wins by KO. Why is a Sambo specialist with dangerous takedowns and a wide submission directory. The ground is his reign and he rules it in terror. Evangelisti is a perfect striker able to mix elements from various martial arts. More than this, Why is a former executioner from Russian Mob, while Evangelisti works for Barksdale, so we have to expect this fight not being the cleanest and fairest ever. Why clearly has experience on his side, but Evangelisti is experiencing that charming moment of his life when he righteously thinks he’s invincible. Add to this the fact that surely Barksdale bribed the Ref, the Judges and also the front row of the crowd. And also add the fact that if I predict Dante losing my life will be shorter than the virginity of a girl’s ass in a Rocco Siffredi movie. Prediction: Evangelisti by TKO. 9th Fight: Lucas LaVey vs Cleveland Brown Is Cleveland’s gun definitely out of bullets? His rematch against Villa, the chance he had been waiting for a lifetime, the only real reason for him to sign with Syn (along with the multiple 0 signing bonus granted by Barksdale) ended in tragedy. Am I a loser? This is the question spinning round round baby right round like a record baby right round round round in the mind of Brown. (Note from Nilmar Gracie’s Psychiatrist’s notebook: I also saw in the subject a weird, pernicious form of regressive thinking. He seems unable to get out of eighties. It comes clear to my mind in the various episodes in which he starts a sentence and ends it with a refrain by Wham, Duran Duran, Kissing the Pink and other artists which had their prime in that period. Don’t know if it can be treated, but this is very threatening for his social coping). LaVey is more than willing to answer a big “YES” to the question. He will possibly try to go quickly on the ground, in order to turn his superior grappling skills into the main factor, but will thus leave some opening for great countering by his opponent, who has a PhD in counter striking and obtained plenty of picture perfect KOs this way. Another unclean outcome, but I would bet there is at least still one bullet in that drum. Prediction: Brown by decision. 10th Fight: The Great Tonying vs Jarkko Jyrays Do you know who Stakanov was ? Yeah, the Russian miner who never had enough of working. Well, Jyrays looks like Stakanov’s minor brother. He fought on Syn 153 and here he is again. in the meanwhile, he worked as a pony express for Fed Ex, as a waiter for McDonald’s and as a male stripper in a women only club. Not a surprise he does not come to this fight in his best shape ever. Tonying is back to Syn after his unlucky parenthesis for MMM, and wants to definitely establish himself as a serious threat for anyone in Heavyweight division. His qualities as a fighter are well known: pure boxing talent and a big right hand. A huge one. Listen, his right hand is so huge that it’s the only human creation visible by satellite, along with the Chinese Wall. Jyrays hasn’t the pure talent of his opponent, but sometimes, when the astral conjuncture is favorable and his medicine is at hand, he’s able to come out with some epic upset. Will he manage tonight? Prediction: Tonying by KO. Well, I would like to stay and talk with you about life, death and Wilhelmina, but I really have to go. Jason says someone found us. He says it lots of time. Since I asked him to help me, he killed a parking attendant, a barman, two supermarket clerks and a taxi driver. All of them, according to his opinion, were killers sent to slay me. Except for the driver, who simply asked too much for the run. Now, if I am still alive and Bourne does not force me to change sex in order to lose my tracks, I’ll be back for the aftermath. Till then… Goodnight, Nilmar Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avon Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 Event Commentary Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avon Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 OK I hate these vids! Why? Tell you soon: they are so amazing that nobody cares about my writeups. by the look of things I will be fired (or killed) soon... Fuck your sick talent! Nah man, we won't drop you in acid just yet, too many people have told me they enjoy your writeups. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rambo Posted March 25, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 25, 2011 Nah man, we won't drop you in acid just yet, too many people have told me they enjoy your writeups. This. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avon Posted April 2, 2011 Report Share Posted April 2, 2011 Syn' 165: Democrazy - Look what they force you to give... “They found us” he said. His eyes were glittering like razor’s blades in the dark. “Who found us?” I asked. “Enemies”. “Barksdale? Broadus?”. He stared at me for a while and I had a shiver. if a digital construct could stare at you, it would do it that way. “Enemies” he repeated. “Jason, we’ve been on the run for days. No rest, no peace. I can’t bear it anymore”. “Look what they force you to give”. Then he shot once with his gun. I heard a moan, then a “thud” on the floor. Then nothing. I crossed the room to the door. A corpse was lying with a crimson aura becoming wider and wider around the head. I forced myself to look better. “He’s the receptionist. The kid who brought in our baggage”. “Enemies”. “He has juvenile acne all over. He’s 110 lbs. he could be 14 years old!”. “I don’t know who I am”. “Who damn cares Jason?! You can’t go on killing people at will”. “Look what they force you to give”. “Who?! Who forces you Jason?”. “Enemies”. “And why are you doing what your enemies want you to do?”. “I don’t know who I am”. Fuck. This guy knows three sentences. Conversation with Jason Bourne is like having sex with Chelsea Clinton: short, dry and unsatisfying. I am just thinking to leave Jason on his own ad ask Avon for a quick execution. After all, who wants to live forever? (Note by Nilmar Gracie’s Psychiatrist: please consider that the Lithium plus Thorazine experimented on the subject clearly obtained as an outcome a drastic reduction of the “Chinese Quote Syndrome”. But, as a collateral effect, we can see an increasing of his regressive thinking. He quotes a refrain from ’80-‘90 music at least every five minutes). OK guys, I did my daily duty charming you with the delicious details of my private life, now it’s time to go into details of this fight night. Who killed who? Time to tell… 1st Fight: Vinny Veechi vs Sallah Alcoubrah A simple equation: you can be as sweet as a candy on your feet, but if someone has the skills, speed and power to take you down whenever he likes, you have no chances to come out alive. Not to say that Alcoubrah did not show competent grappling defense. He survived once, twice, three times… he stood up, again and again but, finally, he’s been finished. Too bad he has not been able to wear Veechi down while standing. Vinny looked as fresh as a breeze while he wrapped around the other guy for the final move. Great job by Veechi, will it be enough to forget about bad dreams? 2nd Fight: Jorge Ramirez vs Jose Salcedo “Don’t stand sooooooooooooooo close to meeeeeeeeeeee!”. A great refrain by the police and also an edless refrain in Salcedo’s mind, at least till the moment he gets droped by a deadly uppercut to the solar plexus which completely got him out of oxygen and bended him on his knees. (Note by Nilmar Gracie’s Psychiatrist: I also have to consider the fact that the quality of his regression is arising. He started with Samantha Fox and Scritti Politti, and now he’s directing towards Queen and Police. A first sign of mental health?). Salcedo was caught in the clinch in the very first second of round one, and never get out alive. Unable to free from his opponent’s deadly spirals, he was forced to witness his own massacre from a very close point of view. Time for Ramirez to step up for huge challenges? 3rd Fight: Vladimir Arlovski vs Cadian Karskin Jr. Well, my informant says that Wilhelmina entered Arlovski’s private room after the fight, wearing just a smile and her silky lust. “I got my mind set on you. I got my mind set on you”. Vladimir looked at her, repressed vomit and answered. “But it’s gonna take money”. “A whole lot of spending money”. “It’s gonna take pretty money”. “To do it right-yeah”. What a lovely conversation! (Note by Nilmar Gracie’s Psychiatrist: OK. Now it’s enough. I give up. Fuck this guy. When he starts quoting George Harrison it’s too much. There must be some way out of here, said the Joker to the Thief… Oh nooooooooooooo, it’s contagious!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!). Like we all, Wilhelmina has been quite impressed by Arlovski’s fight style, and what Wilhelmina wants, Wilhelmina finally gets. Before becoming that beauty’s sex toy, Arlovski gave proof of his fight instinct, skills and tactical intelligence. Karskin looked like he knew but one single way to fight: stay at distance and try to hit some target. Arlovski was more dynamic in changing distance and levels, thus forcing Karskin out of fight plan and ruling him with no particular issues. What can this guy achieve in Syn? Don’t know, but the start is quite promising… 4th Fight: Frank Pembelton vs Lombardo Limba Limba needs to be fed with human flesh in order to maintain his good shape, and tonight he had quite a nice appetizer. A close fight, with Pembleton able to dominate on the ground, but being completely overwhelmed on the feet. Limba (or the evil mind behind him) placed all his chips on round two, and it has been a winning bet. Some were concerned about Judges decision (Pembelton’s coach was eating cage walls, so maybe “concerned” is not the exact word…), but that’s it. Probably Barksdale had some interests in it and bribed or blackmailed the Judges, but that’s how it goes in Syn City… 5th Fight: Joel Bailey vs Justin Mayhem Bailey has been able to harness Mayhem’s power by turning the fight into a dirty, sweaty battle where most of the relevant things happened a couple of feet under the surface. Mayhem was never allowed to shoot his major weapons, taking the right distance to place his jab and land with his long hooks the way Joe Frazier taught the whole world. Entangled in quicksand, forced to fight from inside or on his back, Mayhem did not conduct the fight the way he wanted to. Like Mansur said: the fighter able to win his own fights is a poor one. The great fighter is able to win fights chosen by others. OK, he did not say that, but he should have to, don’t you think? 6th Fight: Zedicus Jones vs Anders Jaerderoth A man has to do what a man has to do. I am sure Jaederoth felt a little pity for poor Zedicus, when he saw him entering the cage creeping on his knees. He was caught in the dilemma: win the fight, humiliate his opponent, put a human life at risk, or be a nice guy, go slow and let Zedicus live another day? The dilemma lasted one single round. Then Jaederoth’s right cross decided for him and put an end to the whole drama, making everyone happy: Jaederoth obtained the victory he needed to put his career on the best tracks, and Jones finally found some rest. An eternal one? 7th Fight: Ernesto Bonjaski vs Jin Sen “Forever young, I wanna be forever young…”. Sen entered the cage singing this refrain loud. Or maybe it’s just my imagination. Have I ever told you about my neural disorder? No, not the one forcing me to say bullshits. No, not even the one which makes me talk via Chinese ancient quotes. The one about old music… yeah, well, I am definitely not out of it. Anyway, Bonjarski heard the refrain too, and made Sen feel all his years on his own skin. Clearly, Ernesto decided to put it on the rhythm. He knew that, with incontinence issues, three bypasses, a prostatic infection and some bad backache going on Sen would have had many troubles trying to follow him on his crazy pace. I know what many of you are thinking: is Ernesto able to decide anything with all that cannabis circulating among his synapses? Well, I don’t have an answer, but maybe this new kind of vegetarianism has its edges. Take it as you like, Bonjarski has been incredibly active and accurate in his fight style, keeping it all on the feet and striking with all his natural weapons. Sen used his experience to slow it a bit down and don’t die of a heartache. He couldn’t do a lot more than this, and simply tried to hear about his loss himself instead of being told about it by a friendly medic… 8th Fight: Stevie Why vs Dante Evangelisti OK, this has to be told entirely. Avon Barksdale did his homework before fight night. He bribed one of the Judges, blackmailed the other one, and threatened the third one promising him a full night of extreme fetish sex with YOUKNOWHO. So everything was settled up quite good. Then he was betrayed by astral conjunctures. It happened that me and Jason were in the arena parking lot just a couple of hours before the fight. Jason saw the Judge taking the money from Barksdale’s hands. “Enemies” he said, and shot him down. “Why did not you shoot Barksdale instead? This could have been the end of our troubles…” I asked (I’m quite a loyal guy, don’t you think?). “I don’t know who I am”. “Fuck, Jason, now we have to hide the corpse and get quickly out of here!”. “Look what they force you to give”. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAArrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Please, Avon, Calvin, if you can hear me… I deserve your punishment: put me down!!!! Anyway, one of the Judges bribed by Barksdale was killed, and instead of hiding him, Jason put his corpse on the proper seat in the Judges’ lobby, saying we had to send a message ( actually, he said “Enemies”, but I think I interpreted his intention correctly). So it happened that other Judges were scared and did not know who was threatening them anymore. One voted for Evangelisti as previously stated, the other one changed idea and favored Why. The third one, substituting the dead, did not know anything about it and simply looked at the fight. Unfortunately, he was Stevie Wonder who was preparing for a concert at the same arena in two weeks and has been recruited last minute. So, everyone in the Hall was convinced Evangelisti won the fight, but Stevie and his terrified colleagues chose another way. Clearly Barksdale dropped them in acid the very second after the invoice reported the scorecard (except for Stevie, who is Avon’s favorite singer along with Andrea Bocelli and Diana Ross). Obviously we have to expect a rematch for it. And Barksdale already contacted three exceptional Judges for the occasion. Judge one: Judge two: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uCuGmYxZprg Judge three: Great choices mate! 9th Fight: Lucas LaVey vs Cleveland Brown The more depressed gunslinger in the world continues to fall, unable to find any grip and start climbing up again. this time he loses by LaVey, who probably is not superior to him in absolute terms, but proved to be smarter and quick in finding the right attunement to the temperatures proposed by the fight. Brown was like Snowhite, fallen in a poisonous sleep and unable to react. He was kissed by the Prince and woke up in the last round, showing all his class and talent, but it was too late: fight was already compromised and there was no way to bring it back. Doubtlessly a great job by LaVey who gained one of the best upset of his career, putting himself quite high on the ladder to glory. 10th Fight: The Great Tonying vs Jarkko Jyrays Takes a second to say goodbye, say goodbye oh oh oh, push the button and pull the plug, say goodbye oh oh oh… Another great song, another symptom for your disturbed, mentally altered writer. But, most of all, another great punch Which will make the history of this sport. This happened after 54 seconds in round one: Jyrays was intercepted by a life threatening flying object, and the fight was over. now, for the ones not lucky enough to witness this event on air, for all those who: 1. Needed to go pissing right in that very moment. 2. Lowered their eyes to take some popcorn. 3. Lowered their eyes to look at their girl’s titties. 4. Were looking at the fight, but were at the same time remembering the time, long ago, when they were Scottish warriors of the Highlands involved in a clan war and penetrated by a Russian monster’s sword (what was doing a Russian monster in a Scottish clan war by the way?). Well, for all of you, this is a close sight of the finishing strike: Now, don’t really know what is going to happen in the next future. I tried to ask Jason to let me go, this is how it went: “Jason, I have to go now. Have to get back to my previous life, no matter what it takes”. “Look what they force you to give”. “Ehm… there are people who are counting on me. I can’t let them down this way”. “Enemies”. “Jason, please, you have to understand. What would you do if you were me?”. “I don’t know who I am”. Fuck, it’s going to be a long way back home… Goodnight, Nilmar Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avon Posted April 2, 2011 Report Share Posted April 2, 2011 Syn' 166: The Great Debate - Preview Love and other mishaps tonight my friends! Your poor Nilmar is still on the run, but things became ever more complicated, since my defender and the bone of contention finally met. Yeah, you read correctly: Jason and Wilhelmina finally met, and what happened… well, don’t know if I can describe it. Let’s stick to the fights for now, and take a look to this card! 1st Fight: Tim Lachance vs Dan Gable I don’t know what’s wrong with Dan Gable: he’s skilled, powerful and on a nice winning streak. Still, he looks sad. Lachance will try to use his Ju Jitsu to make him even sadder, but will have hard times getting rid of his great wrestling skills. Everything will be decided in the first minutes: if Gable manages to play his game, he will probably gain confidence and have his talent work for him. If he gets tangled, he will lose morale and probably the whole fight. I asked Lachance about his opponent in a brief interview. This is what came out: “Hey Tim, what’s Gable’s main fault in your opinion?”. “He’s got just one expression, mate!”. “I am not sure I am with you Tim…”. “Yeah, that fucking Cheshire Smile!”. “What are you talking about?”. “Gable”. “Not sure”. “Yeah, man! He’s been great playing Rett Butler in that movie…”. “No no no no, Tim. It was Clark, I am talking about Dan”. “Oh. So what?”. “What do you think he lacks to be a top contender?”. “Well, let me think. He’s talented”. “Sure”. “Skilled”. “Right”. “But in the end he was never able to repeat that Gone With The Wind performance!”. “Soooooooooo…. Thanks a lot my friend. Good luck for the fight”. Is this guy dumb or simply disrespectful? The cage will tell… Prediction: Lachance by decision. 2nd Fight: Che Satomi vs Eric Scribner Time for rematch between the undisputed Lord of Submissions Che Satomi and the clever young gun Eric Scribner. Scribner is a sweet memory for Satomi, which defeated him via triangle last time they met. Scribner spent lots of tims meditating and preparing for this match. One of his team mates swears he went to Chinese province of Honan to study Kung Fu with Shaolin monks. Now, after months of rice only diet, taking hot braziers with bare hands and walking on rice paper, Scribner looks like David Carradine: he even started to play flute… will it be enough to reverse the outcome this time? I am quite concerned about it: Scribner is advantaged on the feet, but if the fight goes down things are at high risk of turning into a sad déjà vu for him… Prediction: Satomi by submission. 3rd Fight: Krzys Soszynsky vs Gattsu Emelianenko Not a good time for eastern Europe experiments in Syn City: the Russian experiment is used by arena cleaning services to clean the canvas, and it’s not clear what kind of experiment polish scientist wanted to do with Soszinsky. Here are some hypotheses: 1. Testing how many “Z” you can put in a name without being completely washed by the other guy in his attempt to spell it. 2. Testing how many times you can wash a guy’s hair with radioactive isotopes before having him completely bald. 3. Testing how hard a chin can be after being treated with paraffin. Well, whatever it was, it failed. Now Krzys fights tonight to avoid oblivion. He meets Emelianenko, who is having a hard time himself after meeting LaVey on Syn 162. Who will win? In terms of pure skills, Soszynsky looks superior, but there are faults in his training if such a skilled guy gets beaten that much, so I can’t really predict what’s going to happen. Prediction: Soszyinsky by decision. Maybe. 4th Fight: Brandon Tate vs Eric Zimmerman The man whose name is translated “loss by Kimura” in five different languages, Brandon Tate, meets one of the more dangerous purple belts around, Eric Zimmerman. Now, how many times must the cannonballs fly, before they’re forever banned? I don’t really know the answer, but sure it’s blowing in the wind. (Note by Nilmar Gracie’s Psychiatrist: have you ever noticed how arrogant and irritating our patient can be when he states that he’s the smartest guy around and starts playing tricks and jokes on anyone? I suggest a doubled dosage of thorazine). Anyway, Zimmerman needs a win to get out of the rollercoaster. He’s got the skills to survive on the feet and the merciless hitman instinct to finish on the ground. That stated, Tate looks superior in the overall, even if his difficulty to defend from submissions could cause him real issues tonight. anyway, if he manages to keep his limbs safe, he could prevail. Prediction: Tate by decision. 5th Fight: Nameless One vs Fred Lee Well, one day at the Island Bruce Lee, Jim Morrison, Elvis The Pelvis From Memphis and Marylyn were all together like in a “Survivor” episode. They were eating coconuts and exchanging compliments. “You’ve been great in that movie with Jabbar, man” said ETPFM to Lee. “Thanks, I have to admit I envy your pelvis flexibility. It would allow me better high kicks”. Morrison did not know a fuck about martial arts, but wanted to take part to the conversation, so he said: “Well, I woke up this morning and I got myself a beer”. “What?”. “The future’s uncertain and the end is always near”. “As you like Jimmy” said Lee. Marylyn gave a glance to the men and said” Diamonds are a girl’s best friends”. It did not fit, but she was so cute while saying it that everyone agreed. Now, it was during this conversation that Bruce Lee decided he had to leave the island and go back to the world. He changed name to Fred and sailed to Syn City. Before leaving Marylyn gave him a kissy-kiss and said: “Bye Bye baby. Remember you’re my baby when they give you the eye”. He left just one minute before 8:15 flight crashed right there, so it’s a real pity because everyone would have liked to see Sayid fight Lee with K-1 rules. Anyway, Lee is back, and tonight he faces One in a spectacular fight. Lee has the better striking skills, due to his perfect JKD technique, but One can take him to the ground and finish him if he loses focus. His BJJ is quite superior, and this looks like his major key to victory against an opponent able to strike with blinding speed from distance. I) think Lee would take advantage from a pure adrenaline fight strategy. One has to be smart and elusive, treating Lee the same way Houdini would treat a pair of handcuffs. Then, shoot in with some takedown and freeze the fight to the ground, looking for the real opening to end it all. easier said than done, in my opinion, but One is not an ordinary fighter so he can take the task… Prediction: One by decision. 6th Fight: Oscar Alarcon vs Chino Bandito Two fighters with something to forget and something to prove as well, and like it always happen in this sort of collision, it’s going to end with a celebration and a funeral. Alarcon comes in after taking a beating by Why (whose name should be changed in “Because” since he looks like having very convincing arguments…). Bandito needs to get out of a starting losing streak, and I can see his morale dropping dramatically if things go bad again. A close meeting but Bandito looks like having something more in terms of skill and power: if it comes to hard hitting, he should take it home. Prediction: Bandito by TKO. 7th Fight: Gundar Thorsen vs Hector LaRue Heavy hands crossing in this Heavyweight Bout: the violent striker Gundar Thorsen meets the man who gained Ground and Pound the status of martial art, Hector LaRue. You know, Hector likes to turn his fight into a pure gambling challenge: dirty tricks, aces coming from unexpected holes (every hole…), bluffs and “all in” moves are all in his fight directory. It’s hard to see someone bored by his unpredictable fight style. Being a more squared fighter, Thorsen is nothing less spectacular. Win or lose, he recently never had the Judges take any decision. Now, Thorsen will lose tonight. How do I know it? Simply looking at his progression: win-lose-win-lose-win-lose-win, and so on. Just casual outcomes? How ingenuous you are. There is a pure scientific theory behind it. Do you want to hear it? Of course you want to. Now, when Gundar loses a fight, his girlfriend Krsztzina does not see any money for her and then applies the ancient form of strike back women learned in centuries of sex wars: no pussy this time, young stud, try again and be luckier. A sophisticated form of coaching well synthesized by Italian singer Adriano Celentano with his hit “Chi non lavora non fa l’amore” (translated: the man who does not work, does not get laid). So, imagine a 24 years old testosterone anabolic guy with no sex on the horizon for at least one month. Can you imagine the anger? The hatred? The rage? Well, he steps into the cage ready to kill anyone on his path and so he does. As an outcome, he wins and gets a big purse. The cutie is happy, and gives any kind of sexual satisfaction to her lovely man. Sex session over sex session, fight night is near and the guy never saw a gym either in postcards. He steps into the cage with an idiot smile on his face, a ton of beta-endorphins circulating in his body and no adrenaline at all. and he loses. Now, last time he won. It does mean h spent the last weeks fucking the girl and not hitting the bag. So, as I told you, he will lose. Prediction: LaRue by decision. Poor Thorsen, a month of abstinence is on the line… well, he could still check Wilhelmina… 8th Fight: Wyacheszlav The Spermbank vs Kenji Silva Undefeated young gun Wyacheszlav The Spermbank meets Silva in a match that could mean eclipse for a star and bright arising for another. Silva had the chance of his career, but did not get it. He lost by the living legend Jigoro Kane, and now has to watch his back, because a new, young shark is ready to banquet with his flesh and take his place on the top contenders list. A look at Wyacheszlav’s fight stats clearly shows how complete this martial artist is: he can win by head kick or by Kimura. Crack you with an hook or choke you with a RNC. Very impressive. But even more impressive, is the ability of this guy to withstand amounts of damage with no apparent issues. His pain perception threshold is so high that the only way to get down from it is by parachute. Silva, on his side, will rely in the power of his clinch to get the job done. His Muay Thai is simply perfect and probably represents his one way ticket to victory. A very unclear outcome, but I’d bet on the youngster this time. Prediction: The Spermbank by decision. 9th Fight: Aaron Gracie vs Eric Lawler A BJJ Black Belt with great boxing skills meets a world class boxer who has perfect grappling in his directory. How’s it going to end? Gracie lost his title shot against Johnny Rose, but still looks in great shape. Lawler is on a nice winning streak and not willing to stop. There is going to be some rocking and a bit of rolling here, and the one able to take the best profit from the time spent in his own comfort zone will probably walk away with it. I think none of these two trusts the other guy enough to go distance and leave it into the Judges’ hands without trying anything more definite. Lawler trained wuite hard to get ready for it. Here is a nice shot from his sparring session: Will it be enough? Prediction: Lawler by decision. 10th Fight: Hakuin Ekaku vs OMG Zulud And here it comes the fight of the night. The undefeated Syn hero Hakuin Ekaku faces the threat represented by OMG Zulud, knowing that, if he wins this one, there will be a seat with his name signed with fire in the secret chambers of Valhalla. Now, it has to be said clearly: Ekaku is a natural born winner, a phenomenon which probably represents next step in human evolution. Zulud is a great fighter who built up his own career piece after piece, skill after skill by the means of hard work and dedication. He comes in with a less shining record, but clearly he’s hitting his prime so it’s now or never. If anyone can beat Ekaku, this guy is Zulud, right here, right now. Great story, but this is not the way it’s going to end I think. There will be no Rocky Balboa dancing on Apollo Creed’s lifeless body, shouting Adrianaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa all around. Ekaku is going to win. Why? He’s superior on the feet. Superior on the ground. Above all, he’s Barksdale’s top fighter, and nobody likes to walk on water with concrete shoes at his own feet, so it’s going to be a battle and sure blood will spread, but when the knives stop earning their red tribute, Ekaku will be last man standing. Prediction: Ekaku by decision. And night is over. a new dawn will arise soon. Who will see it as a winner, and who will be forced into the shadows by shame and regret? Wow! This one sounded quite good, didn’t it? Now, I promised you to tell you how it ended when Jason met Wilhelmina, and I am a man of word. We were leaving our last Hotel Room. Jason already had his crisis, turned into a hair stylist and tried to arrange my pubic hair in the form of a bat. I gave him a head butt and he awakened. We were just leaving when we saw a human silouhette in the twilight of the corridoir. Jason took out the gun. “They found us” he said. And how would you expect him to say anything different?! “Enemies” I answered. I clearly was tuning with the mood… “Who are you?” asked Jason, and I was glad to hear a new sound from his mouth. Then, the unexpected occurred. “I don’t know who I am” answered the voice. A female one. A familiar one. “Come into the light Wilhelmina” I said. She did it. She was beautiful like the last night I saw her. More or less like a sewerage after Thanksgiving. “Who are you?” Jason repeated. “They found us” she said. “What the fuck…” I said. “Enemies” said Jason. “Enemies” Wilhelmina echoed. “Enemies” said I myself, just not to get cut out of the conversation. Jason stared right into the eyes of Wilhelmina, and had a strange smile. Put the gun away. “I don’t know who I am” he said then. “Look what they force you to give” she answered. Then they ran into the night, hand in hand. Well, Jason, glad you found true love. I think there will be not much conversation between these two. She will ask him something more than words. A lot of something more. Jason, Jason, Jason… look what they force you to give… Now, no girl, no bodyguard, Nilmar on the run alone. Well, life is a mirror: smile at her and she will smile in return… Goodnight, Nilmar Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avon Posted April 2, 2011 Report Share Posted April 2, 2011 Syn' 166: The Great Debate - On Melancholy Hill Well, do you know about that theory which says that, when you miss someone, really deep, you start behaving a bit like him/her? They say it’s a way to carry a part of them with you. Well, these are two things which happened to me recently: First, I was at a fast food on the interstate. Still on the run from the killer twins Calvin and Avon, which decided to write their eternal friendship promise with my blood, I am trying to hide in small, stinky places. I was sitting with a hamburger which had been finely cooked one century ago, with a coke which lost all its gas the day that dinosaurs extinguished, when the waitress came across. She was so damn fat that, more than a woman, she looked like a solar eclipse. “10$ & 50 cents, pretty boy” she said. “Look what they force you to give” I answered, and shot her head with my .32. Well, obviously I had to pick up the pace a bit thereafter... The second episode I want to tell you about occurred at a bus stop. There was a kid sitting on my side, with one of those fucking Nintendo, he was so deeply involved in what he was doing he hardly noticed my presence. “Die! Die! Die!” he was whispering, while shooting at his virtual foes. Then he lost. Looked a bit sad, while resetting the game. He stared at me, I stared at him in return. “Enemies” I said. “Enemies” he answered, glad to find all that empathy in a stranger. No, I did not shoot him, but it’s not the fucking point. I miss Bourne. Hard to confess, but there was a weird kind of alliance between us, a subtle communion of spirits that now is gone. Hope he’s happy somewhere out there with his beloved Wilhelmina… Now, the fights. A night for finishers took place, no much room for conservative tactics: the Great Debate ended in blood and if you want my opinion, this is how all great debates should end… 1st Fight: Tim Lachance vs Dan Gable Someone from the front row swears that Lachance was singing a sweet lullaby to Gable while his legs tightened the hold on his neck. Worst of all, they say it was Bruce Springsteen’s “Pony Boy”. Can you imagine something more devastating? I am not able to tell if Gable lost his senses due to blood vessels restraint or because he could not withstand the pain caused by that terrible refrain: “Giddy up Giddy up Giddy up Woah, my Pony Boy…”. Man, things like this can kill! 2nd Fight: Che Satomi vs Eric Scribner Anybody able to tell me if Scribner entered the cage tonight? I saw Satomi darting out of his corner like Lightning McQueen and doing something that looked to hurt some other guy, but everything ended so fast that I am not even able to tell if it was Scribner, the cleaning services guy preparing the canvas or simply an inflatable doll with Eric’s features. The fact that Satomi took the other one home on his own shoulder after the official verdict makes me think of course… 3rd Fight: Krzys Soszynsky vs Gattsu Emelianenko OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOK, now it s all clear. Polish experiment was: Ø How many punches a guy with no chin at all can take in the face before being completely destroyed? Ø Answer: five. It’s not to say Soszynsky did not train hard for this match. He did. Simply, his training schedule probably was not the more adequate for tonight’s matchup. Here is a shot from his Muay Thai session: Quite good for flexibility, but maybe he did not get in tune for what was going to happen… 4th Fight: Brandon Tate vs Eric Zimmerman A close fight which remained uncertain till the invoice spelled the final verdict and, even now that everything has been stated, still there are concerns about how righteous this victory has been for Tate. Tate clearly won last round, and Zimmerman took the second one hands down, so everything is left to the way you look at round one. Some rewarded Tate for being a little more active in the clinch, but decision could also have gone another way, looking at the ability displayed by Zimmerman to change level and bring the fight down to the ground. It’s been a cruel guerrilla with most of it happening in the deep shades of close distance, so you can’t really put any blame on the Judges being unable to come out with a clear decision. Maybe Tate deserves it, maybe not. sure we deserve a rematch to make things clear about who’s better between these two… 5th Fight: Nameless One vs Fred Lee One thing is dominating a fight. One thing is winning it. Usually, they tend to coincide, but they are not the same thing. When you meet a guy like Bruce Lee (who changed his name to Fred but didn’t become any less lethal for it) the difference all comes clear: One had the better overall, and showed all his class in the first round, choosing the battlefield and perfectly controlling his opponent with great ground game. Then round two started. Lee was hit real hard, and was covered in his own blood. But everyone who saw his previous movies knows this is the moment he becomes more dangerous. Don’t let him taste his own blood, or it will be the end… How did this jump ended? well, it ended with One devastated by a flying head kick in perfect Shaolin Temple style. Lee let his stand up just to punish him again and again with his fists and kick. No chance for One to recover, the ref had to step in to prevent public execution. Now, will Bruce get back to the Island with his long time friends, or is he going to stay in Syn and fight again like this? Go, Little Dragon, go! 6th Fight: Oscar Alarcon vs Chino Bandito Another Brokeback Mountain matchup, with two brawny young men rolling in the dirt of the canvas, glued to each other in a weird parody of sexual intercourses. This is the kind of match that turns Wilhelmina really on, but now she’s totally victim of her passion for Bourne, so Bandito is really a lucky guy, not having to pay a tribute to this unconventional beauty’s lust. But, and here comes a little paradox, Judges decided to kindly reward Alarcon’s activeness and accuracy on his feet rather than Bandito’s ground supremacy. Probably those punches landing flush gave the three jurors more joy than those elbows from top, but I think that this fight could really have gone either way, so I would not be surprised if Bandito’s manager claimed a rematch. 7th Fight: Gundar Thorsen vs Hector LaRue One step away from homicide, finally doctor stepped in and saved LaRue from precocious burial. Thorsen clearly had in mind that he had to win this one or face a long time of sexual abstinence. I felt pity for the kid, and already bought a collection of Hustler’s masterpieces for him, plus a Scribner’s inflatable doll model of course (it seems it’s last trend in self pleasure industry…). Anyway, it proved not to be necessary (now, personal purpose is on the line I guess…). Like in one of those Night Shyamalan’s movies, the end of it all started in a very casual way. LaRue was caught completely off guard by a lazy left hand. A fist Thorsen should not even have thrown. It was wrong for timing, spot, angle, trajectory. The worst left hand of history. And, like it happened when those French monks were trying to make wine and erroneously let some air pass through, an unexpected outcome occurred: the monks invented Champagne, Thorsen won the fight. The fist trespassed all defenses, pierced through the skin and made the blood spill out. Thorsen was quite good to recognize the chance as it occurred, and worked on the cut over and over again. finally, LaRue had to surrender. I think Thorsen and his girlfriend will share some Champagne cup before doing what mammals do on discovery channel… 8th Fight: Wyacheszlav The Spermbank vs Kenji Silva Silva completed a monstrous task! No, I am not talking about his victory against the ex undefeated fighter Spermbank. His real masterpiece has been perfectly mixing a cage fighting and an aerobic lesson. What is Nilmar fucking talking about? Let me clear it: go down – standup – go down – stand up – go down – standup. One step forward – one step back – one step forward – one step back – one step forward – one step back… Now, all that takedown-standup and clinch-escape probably generated a little confusion in Spermbank’s mind. Anyway, when finally his cornermen took the Jane Fonda’s DVD out and aerobic lesson was over, Silva came out with a head kick that dazed his opponent. Spermbank tried to defend, but Silva found the correct distance with a jab and finally hit with a spectacular flying knee that completely turned all lights out in Spermbank’s darkened skies… 9th Fight: Aaron Gracie vs Eric Lawler Gracie started with the right pace in round one, scoring an early takedown which surprised Lawler as well as photographs in the front row, which missed the shot. Unfortunately for him, all those fancy moves clearly displayed his absolute mastery of the ground subject, but did not earn him the early end he would have needed. When the bell ringed calling the fighters back to their corners, we all felt a new match was about to begin. The focus and concentration on Lawler’s face, while he was listening to his coach’s suggestions, distorted his features in a demonic mask. He is going for the evil ways, I was thinking to myself, and I proved to be dramatically right when Lawler’s kick met Gracie’s balls with a sinister sound that was clearly speaking of compromised fertility. Now, Lawler brought his excuses to Gracie, but everyone thinking it was an unwilling act by a perfect striker like Lawler should look right now out of the window, since probably Santa Clause is crossing the skies in this very moment. Don’t miss it guys! Anyway, Lawler deserved the victory: being a champ is not a matter of good manners, so probably Gracie will learn the lesson and come back hardened by this experience… 10th Fight: Hakuin Ekaku vs OMG Zulud Now, despite Ekaku dominating every single second of this fight, I think Zulud has to be proud of what he did tonight. he survived 25 full minutes with one of the deadliest men alive and managed to hear the Judges’ decision on his feet, with his head up high. When in the third minute of round two the hook – uppercut combo threw by Ekaku landed flush on Zulud’s chin, we all thought it was over. Zulud was of a different opinion, he searched for his inner power, called over upon his conviction, and recovered. He fought for real, like Hector in front of Achilles, knowing that he was doomed but refusing to bend his knee. It always takes two to give birth to an epic duel, and this one, definitely, has been. All honors and applauses to the winners, but please, since you stood up, don’t sit back when the loser walks through… Now, this night is over. There have been some upsets in the card, but, in the end, the big stars did not fail the trial. Ekaku confirmed himself to be a demi-god gifted by Ares Himself with an invincible aura. Is there anyone able to break his tyranny? I have to go now but… wait… the kid. The child with the Nintendo. He’s here right in front of me. Guess what he wants. “What are you doing here kid? Aren’t you going back home?”. “I don’t know who I am”. “Well, but your dad and your mom are waiting for you, aren’t they?”. “Enemies”. Oh my God! “What is your name, kid?”. “Jason. My name is Jason”. “Come Jason. We have to move. After all… they found us!”. Karma wheels spinning at the speed of light here: looks like I found a new friend… Goodnight, Nilmar Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avon Posted April 2, 2011 Report Share Posted April 2, 2011 Syn' 167: Killing Stars - Preview Well, guys’ how are you doing out there? Me and Jason Junior are doing quite fine: on the run, scared and hunted, but with lots of things to share. Only difficult moment came when Jason Senior decided to call me on the phone. How did he find my number? Don’t be silly guys, he’s Jason Bourne after all… Unfortunately, Junior picked up the phone instead of me, and that’s what came ou: “Who are you?” said Junior. “Who are YOU?”. “No no no no no, who are YOU?”. “I don’t know who I am”. “Are you kidding me” You know who you are. Me Myself I don’t know who I am”. “Don’t try to school me kid! I don’t know who I am”. “Fuck you grandpa! I don’t know who I am!”. “Well, you asked for it, dumb child…”. “Don’t you dare…”. “I sure will”. “No, don’t say it…”. “Look what they force you to give!”. In that very moment I came by. JJ was biting the phone, trying to rip it into pieces with his teeth. “What’s up Jason? Who’s there?”. And here we are with the Nilmar’s Quiz of the Week! What did Jason answer? o “Enemies” o “They found us” o “I fought the law and the law won” The lucky and smart guy who answers this correctly will win Wilhelmina’s nude calendar and the best seller: “Life in three sentences: introducing the hardlines according to Jason Bourne”. Now, the card! It’s really amazing for me like Calvin and Avon can hunt me down, satisfy insatiable Wilhelmina’s lust and still work on these cards making such a terrifying word. The echo of the fists exchanged by Zulud and Ekaku has not completely faded that here we are again with another paradigm of nonsense violence. Let’s take a look… 1st Fight: Hiroshi Hatayama vs Lucifer Jones And right when nobody believed in him anymore, friends and fans turned their back to him. His girlfriend had sex with Maxwell Smart since she wanted a real man… Lucifer stroke back! Yes, he’s on his feet again after a great and, for some respects, unexpected victory. Now, the answer in everyone’s mind is: what did JJ answer to Nilmar in that fucking moment? OK, but the other question in everyone’s mind is, like Britney says: can he do it again? Hatayama clearly would answer “no” to such a question (He actually answered “enemies” to the first one, but maybe it’s not the time to talk about it…). Clearly Hatayama will try to perform his ground magic and finish Jones before being cracked by some heath seeking missiles of Lucifer’s. That stated, Jones is not a snowball in hell when I comes to grappling and can survive. His right hand will be a real crash test for Hiroshi’s chin if he manages to gain the right distance. An entertaining matchup, and maybe Lucifer is to start a second career… Prediction: Jones by TKO. 2nd Fight: Ivan Drago vs Omar Salcedo Ivan Drago tries to use his fists to get out of the roller coaster, using the depressed Brown Belt Salcedo as his own personal scapegoat. It could look like we’re to expect Drago’s striking to compete with Salcedo’s grappling but be caeful, Omar is quite competent on his feet, especially if he decides to clinch and pierce, like it happened against Lachance. Drago has monstrous hands, but can’t go swinging fists in the air singing merry melodies like the seven dwarves at the mining camp, or he will fall asleep quite soon, and it would be quite embarrassing to see him kissed by a prince in the attempt to awaken him up… Prediction: Drago by KO. Or Salcedo by poisonous apple. 3rd Fight: Dexter Morgan vs Bala Bala Ground and Pound addicted Dexter Morgan faces the submission wizard Bala Bala in this Middleweight bout. Bala is the best human approximation to a Boa Constrictor, and likes chokes as well as limb ripping to finish his fights. In addition, his heart is so huge that he sells it 5$/lb on Valentine’s Day. Morgan has showed great potential thus far, but definitely has to decide what he wants to do as he grow sup: working in his daddy’s butcher shop is noble, and shows us all he’s a devote son, but it’s not completely compatible with cage fighting. Not if you want to be the one to get out alive, at least… he has to train carefully and rest like every human being if he does not want to waste his talent. C’mon kid, make your decision! Prediction: Bala by submission. 4th Fight: Talafua Toluao vs Abraham Valuev A man victimized by fate’s taste for irony. Another one trying to grab his own fate into his hands and make the final step he misses to become a piece of history in Syn City. His team mates swear that Toluao started studying medicine after his loss against Jonathan. When they asked him what the fuck was he doing, he answered: “Well, no damn doctor will decide my fights anymore! I will do my own diagnosis by myself next time!”. I don’t know if anyone had the courage to explain him that you can’t fight and decide if the fight goes on at the same time, but that’s it. So we can expect him to have trained “First Aid” as well as “Defensive Grappling” these days. Valuev is probably one of the best boxers in Syn, but still misses that little something to turn from a great fighter into an established superstar. Will he start finding it tonight? Clearly Valuev’s pure talent and technique will crash against the wall of Toulao’s evil spirit and determination. Will they pierce through? Prediction: Valuev by decision. 5th Fight: Moses Diggs vs Ilan Rotberg AMW Light Heavyweight Champ makes his shining debut in Syn, trying to confirm all his charisma and power. Tonight he faces another first timer in Barksdale’s org, Ilan Rotberg, who had an honorable career thus far, changing more Orgs than Britney Spears changes whiskey bottles in the bar, and doing quite good in every of them. Diggs is perfect in every aspect of the game, but clearly prefers the mechanics of striking rather than the dynamics of grappling. Rotberg has a more mixed way to set up his strategy, and this could be his main edge tonight against an opponent that looks superior to some respects. Now, the only man who can claim to have defeated Diggs in his whole life, Jack Jackson, is now teaching “How I did it: theory and technique of beating Moses Diggs” at the UCLA university. Interviewed about the strategy to use in order to defeat such a talented foe, he answered: “Well, first you make sure to have tons of money. You put them in a 24hours, with a nice security lock. Then you visit the Judges and start to distribute money to at least two of them. Then, when you have won for majority decision, or unanimous if you can afford it, just take the glory, the money and your mouthpiece and run. Where? Does not really matter, just as far as you can from that guy. Moon could be good. Mars would be even better. And, if you ever accept a rematch, make sure not to be in the wrong place at the wrong time!”. A good strategy, don’t you think? Question is: will Rotberg have all that money to invest? Prediction: Diggs by TKO. 6th Fight: Jack Siegel vs Collin Glorious The man who likes to use Leningrada as a combo dummy, Jack Siegel, meets the man who has been Leningrada’s favorite combo dummy until he finally managed to strike back. So, if you attain to the sacred rule… A kicks B’s ass, who kicks C’s ass, and so A can easily kick’s C’s ass (contained in: Easy mathematics applied to cage combat, by Nilmar Gracie) … we should expect quite a one sided fight. But, to be honest, Glorious made a big step forward on his own evolution scale since the time he took Blokada’s shoe between the chicks, so it could be a more contended match than it may seem. Siegel is still favorite due to the golden rule. But this match is my choice for a good upset. Prediction: Glorious by decision. 7th Fight: Harry Balls vs Earl Lee Swagger So much talent to fill a tanker here in this fascinating undercard. Two paragons in the Mixed Martial Arts face each other, and please, do yourself a favor, you guys in the front row: hide deep in your trenchcoats and keep umbrellas at hand, since your favorite weather man predicts red rain. Balls is a brown belt with an insane passion for ground and pound. Swagger is an elite striker mixing elements from various martial arts to complete an unpredictable formula allowing him to strike from any angle, targeting any available area. I interviewed Balls’s manager Diablo Escovar about his guy’s chances tonight. “Hey Diablo, do you think that your guy’s family name will give him some advantage in tonight’s battle? Will he show guts? Will he try some low blow?”. “Idiot” he answered. Don’t know if this helps any tactical debate… Prediction: Swagger by decision. 8th Fight: Ace Ventura vs Jesus Cavalera You know that you’re getting close to the top when everything looks small at your sight. So, you know this is a terrifying card when you see Cavalera fighting in the undercard. A man whose name is translated “main event” in 10 Chinese dialects is forced to fight far from the more brilliant spot. And, to be honest, there is no assured win waiting for him tonight. Ventura is all but a compliant opponent, and comes in with the clear aim to eat the Carnivore for diner. These two never met before, which sounds curious if you think that they are probably among the top 5 fighters in their division. Ventura is a thinker, a man who likes to plan every victory step by step, taking care of single details and asking himself what a Judge may think about a certain move at a certain moment. Cavalera is pure instinct, a man who is turned on by the scent of other men’s blood. One day FBI profiler Clarice Starling interviewed the infamous serial killer Hannibal Lecter about Cavalera, who’s been a patient of Lecter’s when he was a psychiatrist. “I am truly scared when he invites me for lunch” was all he said. The fight is on the razor’s edge, and Ventura looks even superior in some technical aspects, but I think Cavalera’s innate attitude for hurting other human beings will turn into a factor. Prediction: Cavalera by TKO. 9th Fight: Johnny Rose vs Henrik Larsson Larsson tries it again, and faces the nemesis represented by Johnny “The Great” Rose for the Middleweight belt. Rose is still crying all his melancholy, staring at the huge domination he managed to establish over the 185 lbs weight class, and Larsson will try to surprise him off guard and take the victory home. A hard task? Not really. If you take a look to Larsson’s last weeks of training you will clearly understand he thinks quite positive…. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRMfyEojBQg&feature=related Now, Larsson has improved since his last fight against Rose, but still looks outclassed in some aspects of the fight directory. He has to rely on nerves and iron will to take the victory, or even to survive… Prediction: Rose by decision. 10th Fight: Abayo Bokhary vs Rock Johnson Another claim for revenge in this main event. Another fierce opponent trying to make some blue blood spread out and take the crown out of its proper head. After being steamrolled by KillsInWater in the monstrous superfight of Syn 164, Bokhari has to prove his legend is not definitely gone away. There are lots of experts saying that Bokhari’s bluff has finally been discovered and that the man of steel from Calais finally found his kryptonite. This is a turning point in Abayo’s career. Like it happened to Jigoro Kane some weeks ago, he faces a pack of hyenas, ready to strip his skin off if he falls again. will he have the same nerve, and inner power, of his illustrious colleague, and wipe away all the shadows around his throne? In technical terms, he still looks superior by far to his strong opponent, especially on his feet, but technique will not be the key for this one. It’s all in Abayo’s soul, in that mysterious matter hidden deep beyond the synapses of his sophisticated, yet fragile, neural system. Is Abayo’s soul broken? Or is he still the invincible warrior we have been admiring so far? We’re just one bell away from discovery… Prediction: Bokhary by TKO. Well, did you find the solution? It’s very simple: - JJ answered “They found us”. - Then I asked “Who found us?” (well, maybe I shouldn’t have said it, but I am becoming addicted to this rich conversation mood). - “Enemies” he said then. - At that point I simply took the phone out of JJ’s hands and crashed it onto his head. - He sure could have said then “Look what they force you to give”, but he has been creative and, while a crimson river was flowing out of the wounds between his eyes, he smiled and started singing: “I fought the law and the law won”. So, everybody wins Wilhelmina’s sex calendar and this, obviously, is the way it had to go from the start… Goodnight, Nilmar Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avon Posted April 2, 2011 Report Share Posted April 2, 2011 Event Commentary Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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