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Island FC Official Smack Talk Thread


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Theodore "Tingling" Thundercunt

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http://mmatycoon.com....php?FID=286032

"Ahem. Where is MY hype pieces? MY previews? Where are the statues erected in MY honor?! I demand a preview, review, hype piece, blow job, private flight, statue, back massage and toe suck for every one of my fights. I am the king of cbombs and I demand my tribute. Bunch of jackasses. Me Me Me!"

Papa Shango: They made a statue of you; it's underneath the heel of the statue they made of me. You can pretend to be champion, for now. The day will come that I claim my belt from you.

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Everything is black, an deep engulfing darkness has taken over your screen.
Everything is silent, not a single spec of sound waves are coming out of your speakers.
Moments pass without a single occurrence but as your patience reaches it's breaking point you hear a feint sound.
Tap. Tap. Tap.
"Is this thing on?!"
Tap. Tap. Tap.
"Seriously how the fuck do you work this thing!?"
Tap. Tap Tap.
"Ah there we go, damn coconut cameras. This Island I swear..."
Finally we begin to receive incoming footage of the most interesting man on the island...
.......
Theodore: Well hello there butterfly, I see you have all been keep waiting. Well I apologize I had some technical difficulties with my coconut but I think we're good now.
Well then... Where were we.
Ah yes, the complete and total lack of appreciation of the future king of this Island, your one and only Heavyyweight champion, Theodore "Tingling" Thundercunt. I have a middle name too but who cares? I'll write it on your mom's chest with my semen.
Anyways... I am getting side-tracked again. I am here because Island FC has refused to promote me. Ya know first I got a little sad... then I got mad, then I got furious. But... As all smart men do, I came to a startling conclusion.
Why does it matter anyway? None of these chumps are even worthy of producing a write up of the big man much less talking to me in person.
So in short... I have come to a decision.
I, Theodore Gofuckyourselfcunt Thundercunt will interview... MYSELF!
There is an outburst of gasps and awes from from the trees.
Yes... Yes that's right, everyone take a deep breath I know the levels of hype your body can take are reaching their qlimax...
He he.. climax. I mean.
Theodore pulls out a large mirror from off screen that is set on some wheels.
Theodore: Don't ask me where I got this, I have literally no idea where I found this on an island. Aheeem.
The camera switches view to the mirror where Theodore is obviously now wearing a fake mustache and a monocle.
Theo(with a posh British accent): Theodore Thundercunt, you have been called a legend of your time. A Greek god in human form, a titan yet strangely beautiful. Your accomplishments have now spread worldwide as you have become a captain of legends, a legend of captains and you rock that hair like David Bowie. Tell me son... How does it feel to be Theodore Thundercunt.
The camera switches back where Theo has quickly switched out the mustache and monocle.
Theodore: First off, let me say... You sir are one handsome devil, and you rock that fucking mustache.
A weird mixture of posh laughter ensues.
Theodore: How does it feel to be Theodore Thundercunt... How do I even answer that? How does God feel to be God? How does Brad Pitt feel to be Brad Pitt? How does Trump tame animals and keep them on his head? I dunno man... It's feels like I am miracle in human form. Like humanity is blessed with my presence.
We switch back to Theo complete with mustache and monocle.
Theo(with posh accent): Mmm yes yes, I understand completely. It's hard being so magnificent isn't it?
A weird mixture of posh laughter ensues.
Theo(with accent): This Island is very secluded, there even seems to be a weird electromagnetic phenomenon that keeps you from leaving or find this Island. Kind of scary stuff, what do you fear the most?
Theodore: Smoke monsters man... Smoke monsters. Also honorable mentions for local island deities and whispers froming the trees when you are just trying to bang out a chav in the woods.
Theo(with accent): Yes yes... Very problamatic. Your next fight Theodore, you not only face a tough opponent but an alliance member as well. What are your thoughts?
Theodore: My thoughts are... I'm the champion. I'm the man and this guy signed the fight to face me. He may belong to Scooby who may be tight with my less good-looking manager Ryan but the fight is signed. I'm going to strike like lightning and land so hard it sounds like thunder. His chin will be tingling and I will be crowned the best on the Island, that's about it. He seems like a nice clinch-raper and he has a cool manager so it's a shame really. I really must send Scooby a postcard.
Theo(with posh accent): Ah yes, it would be terribly rude not to.
Theodore: Indeed.
Theo(with accent): Indeed.
Theodore: You're a beautiful man.
Theo(with accent: You as well...
Awkward silence.
Theodore: I think it's time to stop the interview...
The camera is shut off as Theodore begins to make advances toward the mirror with a wild look in his eyes. The look of a champion, the look of.... Well yeah, goodbye now!
---------
As soon as this video was published, it instantly became a viral video with fan reactions from all around the world.
Dan from Seattle said "Damn that man is sexy, no homo.... okay homo"
Christie from Austin, Texas said "OMGGGGGG I want both of them in a threeway."
Molly Solverson from Bemidji, Minnesota says "There's more to life than good looks, don't you knooow that?"
Bodie from Baltimore, MD said "This game is rigged man"
Michael from somewhere in the UK said "My sock is sticky..."
Conor from the UK said "I'd tap it"
Grant from Ireland said "Does all his dialogue have to be so ... bold. What a cbomb"
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Theodore "Tingling" Thundercunt

 

http://www.mmatycoon.com/gallery/0/14553952699627.gif

 

http://mmatycoon.com/images/belt/20160122100159logo2_1.png #2 P4P

 

http://mmatycoon.com....php?FID=286032

"Drinks are on me tonight ladies! Send Papa Shango a glass of scotch courtesy of Thundercunt. I wonder though... I looked on Buzz and it seems Highland Games' Heavyweight champion wants to fight me. Waddaya say boys? Rematch with Papa or the most hyped fight this Island has ever seen? Let the smallcunts decide I say!!"

Theodore "Tingling" Thundercunt

http://www.mmatycoon.com/gallery/0/14553952699627.gif

 

http://mmatycoon.com/images/belt/20160122100159logo2_1.png#2 P4P

 

http://mmatycoon.com....php?FID=286032

vs

Voljin "Medicine Man" Ulfzaar

http://www.mmatycoon.com/images/image_blank.gif

http://www.mmatycoon.com/images/belt/20160204025958Belt.png #3 P4P

http://www.mmatycoon.com/fighterprofilepublic.php?FID=285993

OR

Papa Shango

http://www.mmatycoon.com/gallery/0/14574487855310.jpg

Gave me my only loss. No. 1 contender most likely in IFC.

http://www.mmatycoon.com/fighterprofilepublic.php?FID=286387

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http://mmatycoon.com/gallery/39/39w15.jpg

Ryan Hunt (2-2-0)

Hey Theo, how does if feel that even I got more promototion than you ;)

 

 

Theodore "Tingling" Thundercunt

http://www.mmatycoon.com/gallery/0/14553952699627.gif

http://mmatycoon.com/images/belt/20160122100159logo2_1.png #2 P4P

http://mmatycoon.com....php?FID=286032

"I'd say all that promotion and you still got no hype, no pop, no title, no wins, no morale, no manager... At least I'm a self-made cbomb."

24aebd4fa7ab8b428be25d78562ece0b.png

"Gangsta Gangsta at the top of the list!"

OOC: +1s for everyone!

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1 Peter Potter 745 2 Theodore Thundercunt 777 3 Afonso Cabral 970 4 Alexander Vermeer 985 5 Carlos Newton 1293 6 Pyry Kontio 1414 7 Rudy Mar Binay 1619 8 Hop Sing Jung 1703 9 Zui Quan Tso 1715 10 Martyn Ford 1804 11 Tweedle Dum 1914 12 Miesha Tate 1954 13 Gleb Zheglov 2058 14 Otis Whittaker 2105 15 Mark Wahlberg 2155 16 Jake Belcher 2227 17 Papa Shango 2427 18 Jesse Enkamp 2447 19 Rick James 2464 20 Uzziah Judah 2470

For those that say that our talent pool is not the deepest in The Island :dancing: , we couldnt do it without you guys......

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ISLAND FC 19 was live from the Hard Knocks Arena where some of the best fighters in our rooster put up on a violent and bloody spectacle....we had our heavyweight belt on the line and 9 other ,not less exiting fights,from 10 fights we had 10 finishes all in the first round....We continue to fly high and hold tight to that number 1 promotion on the island this season....we had a little issue regarding the last 3 events reviews, but everything is sorted now and the reviews will keep coming as smothly as they have....Now the fights:


265 lbs TITLE Theodore Thundercunt VS Zui Quan Tso (KO OF THE NIGHT)
Theodore found hes rythem and hes running riot on the division this was hes first defense and he passed the test with flying colours...this was fast and furious and was one way trafic...Theodore controled procedures with hes footwork and acurate counter punching....he knew it was a question of time for one of those bombs to conect,and eventualy he did conect with a tremendous uppercut and was lights out for Zui,who did came in well prepared but couldnt cope with Theodore agressivity....Brutal 1st round KO win for Theodore Thundercunt


170 lbs Lucio Gracie vs Luis Machado
Lucio is 4-1 now and this win puts him up there for a title shot....he came in with an expected game plan and executed it to prefection....being the superior grapler he was allways going to try to make this a grapling contest ,and acomplished that very well...he took the fight down at the first oportunity and the worked hes way to a guillotine....Machado looks a shadow of a fighter he once promissed to be and was realeased after this fight....Perfect 1st round submission win for Lucio Gracie


170 lbs Carlos Diego Ferreira vs Kona Bud (SUBMISSION OF THE NIGHT)
Carlos is turning hes carreer around and he scored another win here.....he kept it simple and used hes strenghts to overcome this chalange.....he took the fight to the ground as soon as the bout started but fail to keep active and the ref stand up the fight....he showd good striking defence and amazing takedowns ...we all knew it was goiing to be over as soon as he was scoring hes second takedown,he then made the risk move of droping back for a kneebar,and it paid of.......Beautiful 1st round win for Carlos Diego Ferreira


205 lbs Darth Sidious vs John Bravo
Darth put up a briliant display of acurate counter punching, he kept the distance very well with hes footwork and range preception.....he kept taging John until that perfect overhand right send Bravo face first to the canvas....This win here will get him a step closer to hes goal of becoming the light midleweight champion....good 1st round KO win for Darth Sidious


265 lbs Pedro Carneiro vs David Smyth
The thing with Pedro is that he is one dimentional fighter but he is very good in that dimention...it took him no time to take the fight to the ground and then he was relentless with hes submission attempts ,he shows great confidence on hes skills and hes climbing the ranks pretty well.....good 1st round submission for Pedro Carneiro


145 lbs Asato Mikio vs Dwyane Bas (FIGHT OF THE NIGHT)
This was not as much of the fight of the night as much as it was the preformance of the night by Asato....he controled the pace and conditions of the fight from the word go and let hes exelent boxing do the talking, with brutal and at the same time precise striking gave him a very important win here......exelent 1st round TKO


205 lbs Tobias Swanson vs Fedor Emenlieko
This was a very one sided battle where Tobias superior boxing and the unability of Fedor to take the fight to the ground, were the story of the fight....this was a quick one ,lasted less then 40 sec and Fedor looked like he had no business with Tobias in the cage,some changes in hes game or preparation needed ,i think hes a good fighter and with the right adjustment he can turn good.....Quick 1st round TKO win for Tobias Swanson


205 lbs Victor Champ vs IceIce Baby
This fight could have easily be give the ko of the night award, one of the most disturbing KO ever witness in our Island cage....the fight in itself only lasted 18 sec and the crowd went silence when Victor conected with that left hook ,he was out against the cage with hes eyes rolling back and a funny noise coming of hes lungs...after the fight he was air lifted to the nearest hospital where he under went futher tests regarding hes well being.....Brutal 1st round KO for Victor Champ


265 lbs Don Neece vs Bangel Redman
With a total of 0-5 between both fighters ,one of them would have to score a first win...and that fighter was Don Neece ,the american went for it ,he waisted no time and took the fight to where he most feels confortable.....he was very smoth in the transitions and managed to secure a very important submission win for him...importante 1st round submission win for Don Neece


170 lbs Bob Wakosky vs Kwincy Wong
Wong wnted to make this a brawl but Bob had diferent plans and kept countering with single shots and takedown attempts ,he had a couple stuffed but eventualy he secured hes takedown, we all tought thats where he wanted to be but Wong proved a slipery custumor in the floor and show good escapes too....but he was being very inefissient in the clinch and paid the price when he got careless and got cought with a strong short punch....it was all she wrotte as someone might say.....good 1st round win for Bob Wakosky


This was all from us , we will keep bringing to you the best events , in the most entretaining promotion in The Island....Me ,JJ and the Crew wish you all the best preparation for the upcoming events, the divisions are geting stronger.....so big match ups coming up...... :winner:



#ISLANDFC
#THEUNIT
#MAMADO
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Theodore "Tingling" Thundercunt

http://www.mmatycoon.com/gallery/0/14553952699627.gif

http://mmatycoon.com/images/belt/20160122100159logo2_1.png #2 P4P

http://mmatycoon.com....php?FID=286032

"I'd say all that promotion and you still got no hype, no pop, no title, no wins, no morale, no manager... At least I'm a self-made cbomb."

24aebd4fa7ab8b428be25d78562ece0b.png

"Gangsta Gangsta at the top of the list!"

OOC: +1s for everyone!

Do you think you can beat Voljin "Medicine Man" Ulfzaar ?....if you do and you manage to beat papa shango i will arrange a fight between the two of you has an island superfight

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IFC Challengers 2 was live from the Hayashi's Lounge in another trademark wonderfull event with drama and exitement,we put togheter this intriguing card and we had everything Ko's submissions decision and the bantamweight champion defending hes belt again.....the promotion is runing at a tremendous pace and it wont be long before we establish ourselfs as the one and only credible organization in the island....now the fights:


170 lbs Tweedle Dum vs Octavion Prompethius (Fight of the night Award)

Tweedle Dum put himself right in contention for a title fight after this win here ...he did well as allways and play to hes strenghts wich is a wonderfull clinchwork with relentless striking , he uses hes MT clinch very well and absolutly bullied hes oponent for most of the fight ,i say most, because Octavion had hes moments and was due to that , that this fight kept the fans in their toes and allways guessing....saying that Dum dominated the first and the second round was just a formality , he kept doing what he does and eventualy hes oponent couldnt take it anymore.....Good 2nd roud TKO win for Tweedle Dum


135 lbs TITLE Miesha Tate vs Walton Kunz (Sub of the night Award)

This was our title fight on the card and we had our own afrodite champion trying to defend hes belt....The fight went has predicted ,we all knew the fight would be decided on the ground and was exacly what happend....Tate took hes first chance and got the takedown ,they were both exanging submission attempts, but Kuntz was playing with fire and a superior BJJ fighter for the matter...it didnt took long before Tate worked hes way trough an arm triangle....exelente 1st round submission win for Miesha Tate


265 lbs Mark Wahlberg vs Ogre Treestump (KO of the night Award)

Mark is looking great lattley and this win will almost certenly get him the next title shot...he put away a very dangerous fighter with a peach of an head kick that landed flush on the side of Ogre's head...he played tactics to prefection ,kept the fight standing picking up hes oponent from the outside with good mixing of combinations kicks and punches....he was the superior fighter all the way and deserves this win entirely.....spectacular 1st round KO for Mark Wahlberg

265 lbs Michael Campion vs Rob Hall

Champion hes your typical ground and pounder,thats hes style and he looks very confident with that aproach....he waisted no time and got the takedown from where, he punished hes oponent with some brutal ground and pound...hes more muscular building allows him to control well the grapling exanges and thats what he did here....Rob stayed in the contest for as long as he could but there were far too many strikes coming trough hes defenses and eventualy hes chin couldnt take it no more....dominante 1st round TKO win for Michael Campion

265 lbs Joe Lang vs Harry Balls

Another first round finish,this time we had two very good MT specialist mesuring strenghts inside our cage....Joe strenght and ability to avoid the takedown proved pivotal factor on this contest....he manage to lay down the rules on how this fight was going to unfold and he acted like a clinical killer in there....good 1st round TKO win for Joe Lang

265 lbs Augustus Sin vs Sam Jackson

Augustus was relentless in that clinch,he absolutly ground hes oponent down againt the cage , he used balanced agression and unloaded a barrage of strikes from that position....i was surprised that hes oponent actualy hold hes own for longer then what everyone was expecting....dominant 1st round TKO win for Augustus Sin

155 lbs Nate Gonzalez vs Greg McConor

I think Mcconor will regret hes move of trying to take this fight to the ground against a,now obvious, better submission specialist....he paid an heavy price for that ,still survived a couple of submission attempts but eventualy got caught in an armbar....good 1st round submission win for Nate Gonzalez

185 lbs Revelation Vinapola vs Islam Sulimani

This was a rematch and it played out the same way as their first encounter....Vinapola dominated in the clinch trough out the fight....he controled procedures with hes superior clinchwork, avoid the take down and manage to keep the fight in the clinch for the intire fight....well deserved decision win for Revelation Vinapola

265 lbs Grimson Bob vs Ulrich Holworth

With both fighters with tendencys to get cut , we were all expecting a bloodied fight....it lived to expectations at one stage it looked like the fighter were inside the "Tomato Festival" in spain...an absolute horror show with blood flowing everywhere...in the end the doctor stoped the contest due to a cut...bloodied 1st round TKO (cut) win for Grimson Bob

265 lbs Tarik Slice vs Martin Thomsen

This was a very slik submission win for Tarik, he manage to keep composed and didnt rush to finish the fight when he got hes oponent in trouble....he showed great awerness of the fight conditions and moved into that armbar with lightning speed catching hes oponent of guard.....convincing 1st round submission win for Tarik Slice

OK guys i know this review comes a bit latte ,but has they say, better latte then ever...there is still event 17 an 18 to come out soon.....we want to make sure we keep giving you the best reviews in ALL events.....this was all from us keep tune.....

#ISLANDFC

#THEUNIT

#MAMADO

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Andrey "Gold" Lobtov (290679)http://www.mmatycoon.com/gallery/0/14541185549142.jpg

Olympic Judo Champion. Starting his MMA career 3-0.

Multiple Rumours spreading around the highly touted Olympic Judo Gold Medalist including his early MMA retirement after his next bout, and also the possible signing with Island FC.

Rumours also have it that he is looking to fight his now stablemate Hop Sing Jung, as they have met 3 times before in Judo competition with Jung winning 2 of the 3 by submission. Their last meeting was at the 2012 Olympic Semi Finals where Jung put Lobtov to sleep with a Gogoplata with 7 seconds remaining. It is said they hate each other but will remain peaceful. It is questionable if these two will be allowed to fight each other.

Lobtov would win Bronze and Jung won Gold that year in 2012 but in 2016 Lobtov would claim his dominance when he moved up to 155 lbs and defeated current Island FC Lightweight Champion Pyry Kontio in the Gold Medal match while Jung would Claim Gold at 145lbs. Jung also competed and won the open weight division.

Interesting week in Island FC.

After winning his Island FC debut in the first round, he is granted a Title shot vs #2 P4P Potter. No comment from Lobtov yet.

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Do you think you can beat Voljin "Medicine Man" Ulfzaar ?....if you do and you manage to beat papa shango i will arrange a fight between the two of you has an island superfight

 

 

 

http://i68.tinypic.com/f53g4h_th.jpg

Voljin "Medicine Man" Ulfzaar (285993)

11-0-0 (W-L-D)

If you guys can make this fight happen, Ill be thrilled about it. But I would need a tribute of 20 virgin girls (18 and above ofcourse) and a quality 16 man-riding-an-ostrich racing before I accept this fight.

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Martin Luther "Preacher" King Jr (289769)

 

 

http://www.mmatycoon.com/gallery/2/2b15.jpg

 

 

"Yup, Ryan Hunt for example is still virgin."

http://mmatycoon.com/gallery/39/39w15.jpg

Ryan Hunt (2-2-0)

Coming from the guy nicknamed 'preacher'. Stop touching little boys son.

 

ISLAND FC 20 IS HERE....latter today we will have our rubber match between 2 of the islands best fighters Alexander Vermeer v Hop Sing Jung http://www.mmatycoon.com/images/menu_files/scout3.jpghttp://www.mmatycoon.com/images/menu_files/stats2.jpg

 

whos wining this one guys?

My boy Vermeer of course. Sonofabitchgonnawoopsomeass.

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