MauriceSimmons

These mmat softies got to him

Kilo beats Thanos ez but Big Peter gon' send the old man back to his little village in the middle of nowhere #RetireKilo

Blasphemy

You're asking too much from these Americans

Nope, you've said worse things to me and by now you should know I don't take you serious as a human being That backpack beautiful tho just like me, maybe I'm really it

YOUNG CAVE GANG PROSPECT DISAPPOINTED BY LATEST SHOWING Chumani Adofo (7-1-1) 22 year old Chumani Adofo failed to hide his disappointment after his terrible showing vs Money Promotions former Featherweight Champ White Goodman. The fight ended in a draw which most people (including Chumani) thought was unfair to Goodman as he clearly was the better man last night. Chumani was poor on the feet, only managing to land 2 strikes on Goodman in 15 minutes. "I just couldn't hit him. I was loading up for every strike but it's like he could see into the future or something because he just kept dodging them." His manager Maurice Simmons had this to say about the encounter. "I think we should blame SCRAP FC ownership for everything that occurred last night. It was a weird event and weird shit is bound to happen on a weird event. The fight was both a preliminary fight and a main event, I think that kind of unsettled Chumani to say the least. An elite striker like Chumani only landing 2 strikes against a bummy grappler like White? That's beyond weird." The judges came to Chumani's aid by ruling the fight a draw. Judge Don Winkell who scored the fight 29-28 for the young Adofo was called up to give his reasons behind such a controversial decision. "I feel like Chumani did more to win the fight. The other guy was doing a poor impression of a Dagestan wrestler that's why I feel like he didn't win. Only 6 strikes landed on the ground in 15 minutes? That's not enough for me. He is a fairly accomplished grappler with 7 submission wins under his belt so he had to show some more dominance. Not to mention, Adofo dominated in the clinch, a clinch where Goodman would regularly initiate. That and Adofo's aggressiveness was enough for me to give him the win." It's highly unlikely that these two fighters will meet again any time soon with SCRAP FC owner rumoured to have gone into hiding after realizing he has no money to pay the winner of his tournament. BROUGHT TO YOU BY...

CAMP CAVE GANG PRESENTS: FIGHT REVIEW Chumani Adofo vs White Goodman VS https://mmatycoon.com/fightcommentary.php?FTID=1108865 Goddamn can't believe I fumbled the bag and los.. I mean drew against this bum. All the fault goes to me tho, had I scouted the opponent and knew he had a Granite Chin I would've planned accordingly and got the easy dub. No biggie tho, Camp Cave Gang Rides On! #FUTUREGOAT #BFM #sackyourshittymanager

And you, you're a tall for nothing, butthurt racist old man who tries to get relevant by constantly dissing the FUTUREGOAT. Get of my dick bruh

I suck but u hiding DMMA champs way up in your ass because of me? Ok bro

let them hate

#sackyourshittymanager

This is no place to farm for spins so fuck off, respectfully

No doubt. He is Lord Voldemort wit it

Fake news. I never had an interaction with Grump and Optimal mentored that bum Scott so it's impossible he also mentored the FUTUREGOAT And the GOAT is not supposed to take sides when his disciples square off, it's not fair

Tough fight. Is it FUTUREGOAT vs Jet & GOAT tho?

I never rage sack, check the guys u beat. They belong on your roster more than mine

You're like annoying pest, get lost bum

Hmm, crazy how 4 of those 5 guys you beat are no longer on my roster. 2 QFC dubs, one over an 18 yo and one against a throwaway fighter lmao. You only have 1 win against me lil boy stop cappin

U out here ranked #150 in a game with 50 players

FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!

CAMP CAVE GANG: FUTUREGOAT RISING 2023 Shit, I figured since I got a logo for my gym I might as well flash it around the forums and what better way to do that than regular updates on my incredible fighters? Ladies, gentlemen and bums welcome to Camp Cave Gang updates 2023! This is where I will document my weekly Golden Showers that I be handing out to bums like the Smesh Hoes and One Skin Coyote Pack. CAVE GANG UPCOMING FIGHTS For the first weekend of March we got some easy fights and against bummy managers and fighters. Really, we should breeze flawlessly through all of these unless my fighters do their best impressions of the bums Scottie Bandz calls "his fighters". Wouldn't be surprised if we catch a few Ls though since I give my guys the freedom to fight however they see fit but most often than not (like 99% of the time) they lose when they start thinking they know better than me. I should really consider getting them off 100% shig😔. Moving on to the fights... VS First off we got the pride and joy of Cave Gang, the young South African tiger Chumani Adofo. He's going against White Goodman who, even with a record of 8-1, is a fucking bum, a bum. Despite being a champ of one of the best orgs of all time Money Promotions I still have no respect for this guy. My boy will step on him easy. He's light work like Mannetosen's guy Keith Kenny Ferkingbum, Camp Cave Gang's favorite hoe. VS Second fight of the weekend we'll be seeing young and promising fighter Kuromiya Hiro make his debut under Camp Cave Gang banners. This is a guy who looks really promising and soon he'll have his chance to show his worth. His opponent is a bum tho so I don't think I'll get to learn much from that fight but fuck it, hype's hype. VS Last Cave Gang fight of the weekend is the big stepper Yannick Sakala going against yet another Master Leader fighter. Master Leader just doesn't get tired of losing to Cave Gang, dude's like 0-3 vs us already and all the L's are TKO's. Last time we met Yannick Sakala put a pounding on that ass and put it to sleep in under a minute, 49 seconds to be exact. This is a good opportunity for both me and Yannick to prove our points, mine being: One Man Coyote Pack is a bunch of colourist mfers with no slider knowledge. I already retired one of their top dogs Optimal now I'm gunning to take out yet another one of them. For Yannick this is his chance to show that he's a threat in ENIGMA by taking out one of the top HWs in the division. Light work really VS Mid-week we're having one of our toughest fights of all time when we go against slider wizard and top CK prospect Jet and his guy Pauly Jurgensen Sanchez. Saying this fight is tough is and understatement, it's damn near impossible to win emo. Jet is like 1 of 2 Smesh Hoes I'm legit below in terms of skill, the other being none other than the Young GOAT John Wayne. Colby has informed me that he fears nothing and will put Pauly through hell as he looks to climb up the SYN rankings. My guy's confident in the face of adversity, what more can I ask for really? That's it for Camp Cave Gang updates this week. If you didn't like this write up then you're free to receive a Golden Shower from me, the FUTUREGOAT. Just link your top 100 p4p ranked fighter and I'll find him an opponent. GANG SHIT!! #FUTUREGOAT #BFM #ThePettyKing

Shigeru Otori (16-10-1) "Marko Kersikov, I'm next in line for that belt! I hear Mr Butch doesn't want to give me the title shot so I'm asking you to be a man and not accept a fight offer against these other weak guys. I respect you very very much and hopefully we get to share the cage soon. Arigatou!"

Colby Gebhardt (14-5-0) "My manager has been telling me to go easy on Pauly Jurgensen Sanchez because he's friends with his manager, I say screw that! I've been going easy my whole career and where has that got me? A Blaze Brothers title?! No mate, I'm going hard on these fellas from now on. Pauly, I'm coming for that head and I'm spanking that ass."

" "The Lynx of Lima" Junqueiro Santo Amaro (10-4-0) "Hey puta! Why is your amigo ducking smoke huh? He knows he got lucky last time around now he running around like a little chihuahua. Come on, tell Jorge me and my manager are ready for him this time. No time for games now, the Lynx is out hunting"

Ok Monkey