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The1rstSaint

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  • Birthday 02/09/1982

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  1. Ladies and Gentleturds we have had a total of 34 fights out of 60 ended in a First round finish to start the MILF League's off. Below I got a list of the top 5 Fastest Subs and top 5 Fastest KO's. I will continue to update this list every 2 weeks per the League format. Once I have some more spare time, I will be updating everything on the First post of the Thread to make it easier to find, as well as the Overall Point Standings. We do love are Finishers here almost as much as we love are MILFS! Top 5 Fastest Submission Victories 1. Mario Isaksson def Emile Kasumu via Arm Triangle 38 seconds 2. Eric Frost def Sauli Suolestaja via Armbar 43 seconds 3. Nate Robinson def Grayson Velazquez via Kumura 49 seconds 4. Eduardo Chavez def Vincent Duboulay via Triangle Choke 1 minute 34 seconds 5. Jardani Jovonovich def Faarooq Rahim via Guillotine 1 minute 40 seconds Top 5 Fastest Knock Out Victories 1. Jorma Saarinen def Gabriel Mil via Superman Punch 8 seconds 2. Valentino Andolini def Elix Juarez via Strikes 21 seconds 3. Aden Parker def Jukka Raikkonen via Strikes 24 seconds 4. Danny Vargas vs Drederick Haytum Punch 43 seconds 4. Stefan Schilt vs Xavierntreal Couture Punch 43 seconds
  2. MILF Heavyweight Point Standings 1. Crude Jensen 6 Points 1. Bennett Peck 6 Points 1. Kaito Tanaka 6 Points 1. Janne Virtanen 6 Points 1. George Pogie 6 Points 6. Galen Fisherman 5 Points 7. Boyko Mitcheck 0 Points 7. Jesse Kidd 0 Points 7. Jumbo Mills 0 Points 7. Kukina Maluga 0 Points 7. Elliott Acosta 0 Points 7. Aleki Veainu 0 Points 7. Michael Brogan 0 Points Yet to Fight: Judo Dan, Quintin Barnett, Dezzi Island, Kainalu Kekoa, Chandler Warner, King Hippo
  3. MILF Super Heavyweight Point Standings 1. Stefan Schilt 6 Points 1. Scooter McGraw 6 Points 1. Kristopher Marks 6 Points 4. Tristan Sandoval 3 Points 4. DD Dominguez 3 Points 6. Xavierntreal Couture 0 Points 6. Uche Igwe 0 Points 6. Enzo DiMaggio 0 Points 6. Khamzat Aliyev 0 Points 6. Semi Veainu 0 Points Yet to fight: Zare Loki, , Freaky Craig,
  4. MILF Light Heavyweight Point Standings 1. Erik Bjornsson 6 Points 1. Jorma Saarinen 6 Points 1. Pascal Popper 6 Points 1. Mr Pancit 6 Points 1. Mario Isaksson 6 Points 1. Crazy Mike 6 Points 7. Morris Begley 5 Points 7. Derek Rodney 5 Points 7. Orville Dudpops 5 Points 7. Tug Violet 5 Points 11. Jayden Marsh 0 Points 11. Crazy Horse 0 Points 11. Rock Steady 0 Points 11. Metyl Handz 0 Points 11. Gabriel Mil 0 Points 11. Deon Woods 0 Points 11. Zaid Owens 0 Points 11. Mitka Boycheck 0 Points 11. Emile Kasumu 0 Points
  5. "My opponent knows he dreams of having a beautiful mane like me. I don't want no butt play out of you in are fight either baldy. Keep it on the feet!"
  6. MILF Heavyweight League It is now time to bring out the big clowns in the always exciting Heavyweight Division. Sure, are Super Heavyweights may be monstrous but those 265ers are on another level of brute savagery. The MMA world was founded on the supremacy of this division, and I think to this day it still holds true as the most exciting division mostly contributed to lack of good cardio and terrible mismatches but that's neither here nor there. Now let's 20 entrants into the Heavyweight MILF league! vs Crazy Mike (2-0-0) Boyko Mitcheck (1-0-0) Starting things off is the Main Event contest on Sunday's MILF 6 card as grapplers collide. Crazy Mike hails from Brooklyn, United Kingdom which I must say damned you for making me Google the Legitimacy of that town! Crazy has rallied of two straight first round wins which he has demanstraded his masterfull use of the clinch in both fights. Crazy Mike brother from another mother of Crazy Horse will be Ispa Murhapuro 's second entrant into the MILF Leagues. Russian BJJ Brown belt Boyko Mitcheck pulled off the most incredible come back wins so far this Island season when he armbarred MR Pancit at MILF Prospects 2, with just 2 seconds left on the fight clock. Much like his Main Event opponent Mr Mitcheck is the brother to LHW Mitka fighting out of the Mit Dm crusade. vs Crude Jensen (1-0-0) Jesse Kidd (1-0-0) Another Clash of styles is up next as the boxer/wrestler does battle with the BJJ brown belt. Crude Jensen calls Dopenhagen, Denmark home and is off to a 1-0 start this Island season. Jensen's QFC debut went just the way manager Grant Brophy expected I assume, as he wore his opponent down with several successful sprawls shutting down his foes Takedowns completely. The Big Dane finished his opposition with a big an overhand right and some Hammer fists. Next up fighting out of Glasgow, Scotland the big ball of blubber thunder known as Jesse Kidd. Kidd ended the career of Mr Island before it really even got started when he took him down and suffocated him with those man titties, there really is no coming back from that is there? You can't sleep on Jesse's jitz he displayed that, and his manager Bijnok Trink will be there to guide him. vs Jumbo Mills (1-0-0) Bennett Peck (1-1-0) Looks like we will have an epic slugfest in the third Heavyweight matchup as two Boxers face off. Heavy Handed Australian Boxer Jumbo "Bloody" Mills made his professional debut at MILF Prospects 1 in thrilling fashion with a Spinning Back fist, which was followed up with some un-needed strikes as the ref looked to shocked to do his damn job. Mills will be the final member of the Albert Summertop group. We have a second Scottsman to join the MILF HW league by the name of Bennett Peck. Peck also a highly touted boxer had an equally impressive debut but fell victim to a Kimura lock in his second QFC outing. Bennett will be God War's sole Islander this round. vs Kaito Tanaka (1-0-0) Kukina Maluga (0-1-0) Sticking with the showdown of strikers we have another boxer vs Muay Thai experience in store. The native of Osaka, Japan Kaito Tanaka is a phenomenal boxer which was showed in his Pro debut. In that debut he let his fist fly landing 83% of his punches in route to a dominant Unanimous Decision verdict. Kaito will be cornered by the talented Akira Shigeru as he and fellow training mate Erik Bjornsson look for Island glory this season. Kukina "Bubblebath" Maluga is the illegitimate child of the MMA legend Kilo Maluga and though his famed father denies this you can't deny that face. Maluga has a solid background in Muay Thai and Wrestling and is known to have a lil chunk of that KO power of his pa. Kukina will be the final Team Judas member for the MILF leagues let's hope he lives up to his potential. vs Galen Fisherman (1-0-0) Elliott Acosta (0-0-0) A battle of young American striker's steps in as the 5th Heavyweight contest. Galen Fisherman of Omaha, Nebraska is the final John Wolf fighter to take part in the League this year. Much like his training partners, Galen has a strong background in Boxing as he looks to round out his skill set. Fisherman has collected a KO victory already at MILF Prospects 2 as he now looks to step into the spotlight as the league begins. Rounding out the Ragnar Ragnarson Fight Team is Toledo's Elliott Acosta. Elliott will be making his Pro debut Sunday and looks to have a Muay Thai base. Much like his opponent Acosta is just 18 years old and will be rounding out his skills this Island season. vs Janne Virtanen (0-0-0) Aleki Veainu (0-0-0) Two more MMA debuts as Finland meets Tonga in a battle of the beats. Muay Thai Practitioner Jane Virtanen hails from Espoo, Finland and fights out of the Sakki Karvonen camp. Virtanen as stated makes his long-awaited MMA debut. Before his signing Janne thought about a career in Milking snakes which he abruptly quit after his first ass bite. The next wave of Veainu brothers have landed on the Island as Aleki looks to follow in his older bros' footsteps. Aleki "Zombie" Veainu has a background in boxing and wrestling. Also making his debut this 23-year-old Tongan should be one to keep an eye on if he has the sauce. vs Michael Brogan (0-1-0) George Pogie (0-1-0) Interesting matchup of wrestler vs BJJ is up next, both looking to bounce back after their debut losses. Michael Brogan dubbed the "The Hulk Hogan of Showman" will be rounding out Jake Kelley 's group this Island season. Brogan a wonderful wrestler had some struggles in his debut but expect this toledo born youngster to get in a better rhythm this time around. George Pogie From Delutte, United States has a solid background in BJJ where he currently holds a Brown belt status. Pogie and cornerman Sihu You didn't get the chance to showcase their skills much in the debut at MILF prospects 1 but luckily the league only officially started last weekend. Time to shine tomorrow boys. vs King Hippo (0-1-0) Dezzi Island (1-0-0) Two recent signings will meet at MILF 7 this Wednesday in a classic striker vs grappler bout. Hippo Island, Samoa will be represented by King Hippo himself. Hippo had a very unfortunate debut fight after winning the first round he was forced to withdraw due to a cut. Though he struggled on his back that fight he was a perfect 26/26 on his punches standing. Not bad at all for primarily a wrestler, expect Head Coach Mac Little to have him firing on all cylinders just protect that belly big boy. Dezzi Island made a successful debut in his QFC outing, before signing with MILF. Dezzi nullified his opponents' Takedown attempts in route to a 2nd round One KO. Island is a member of the Jero Wolf team and fights out of St. Paul, Minnesota. vs Kainalu Kekoa (1-0-0) Chandler Warner (1-0-0) Wrestling vs Muay Thai as two Americans look to battle for their second wins on the Island. Hailing from Kaneohe, Hawaii Kainalu Kekoa brings with him a wonderful wrestling pedigree and decent coxing. As stated in my previous preview his debut was nothing more than an Exhibition bout, so we didn't get a chance to see his true style. However a win is a win, and he is 1-0 as him and Manager Squirrely Dan look to hop into the MILF HW league. Chandler Warner fights out of Chicago, Illinois and has a background in Muay Thai. Warner had quite the explosive debut at MILF Prospects 4 notching an incredible 5 second KO. All be it that was against a man he outweighed by nearly 100 pounds let's see how he fairs against fellow HW's. vs Judo Dan (1-0-0) Quintin Barnett (1-0-0) Are final HW fight will be between two recent signings off to excellent starts. Las Vegas. Nevada is the home of Judo Dan who is an accomplished wrestler mixed with a splash of Muay Thai. In Dan's debut he showcased his Clinch work with a perfect 16/16 strikes landed inside the clinch in route to a first round TKO win. Judo will be Pekka Pouta 's lone Island fighter as he looks to make a statement in his MILF debut. Last but not least we have Cali native Quintin Barrett of the Liminha God fight team. Barrett looks to be the most balanced fighter in this division with a background in Wrestling and Muay Thai. He also has a blue belt in BJJ which may come in handy, it wasn't needed in his debut though as he opened a striker's clinic on his foe both in and out of the clinch.
  7. I am and upstanding citizen in these here parts ill have you know. Mr. Madness don't get High, he stays High in fact on a little thing called life. Thank you very much!
  8. Love your style first off......but If I may say, we here at the MILF Headquarters love all of the Fighters almost as much as are MILFs! Carry on now, back to the smack talking!!!
  9. MILF Light Heavyweight League 205 has to be considered the most devastatingly entertaining division in MMA in my not so humble opinion. A combination of power, agility, and speed you have to be in tip top shape if you expect to do anything in this division, if not your as will get slept plain and simple. This Island Season expect no difference, we got 18 Light Heavyweights currently signed, booked and ready for war. Time to pull out the guns and let the Anarchy begin! vs Jayden Marsh (2-0-0) Erik Bjornsson (1-0-0) We get 205 started with a matchup that could very well be a rematch down the road with a nice shiny belt on the line though next time. Liverpool slugger Jayden Marsh has racked up a quick 2-0 record both wins coming by way of Knock Out. Marsh comes into the competition with a background in Muay Thai his last fight lasted all of just 18 seconds. Yet another member of the Todd Westacott Island group, Marsh looks to keep his destructive momentum going tomorrow. Roughneck Biker on the outside, gritty warrior on the inside, Erik Bjornsson of Stockholm, Sweden is 100% violence. Bjornsson took his time in his professional debut waiting for that perfect shot and it came at the halfway point of round 1 and it came in the form of a hellacious Uppercut. Erik will be representing one of two Islanders from the Akira Shigeru brigade. vs Crazy Horse (1-1-0) Morris Begley (1-0-0) Two more strikers go head-to-head in the second bout at 205 both of which hail from the Mad country of the USA. Brooklyn native, Crazy Horse got his career off to an upsetting start finding himself in trouble early and forced to tape to a Kimura lock. Horse rebounding nicely at the MILF prospects 2 event with a late first round TKO victory, as there was just 4 seconds left on the clock. Crazy is one of Ispa Murhapuro 's wild and crazy kids to join the MILF league this season. Morris Begley has a solid mix of Boxing and Wrestling he uses, and his debut couldn't have gone any better. After and early takedown he worked his way back to his feet with ease and unloaded a devastating counter overhand right to end his debut QFC fight in style. Morris will be Grant Brophy 's representee in the 205 MILF league. vs Emile Kasumu (1-1-0) Mario Isaksson (0-0-0) American boxer/grappler clashes with Swedish BJJ in this next bout. Fighting out of Virginia Beach, VA Emile Kasumu has an interesting background in striking and grappling. Primarily a boxing style Kasumu pulled off an impressive Armbar in his QFC debut. Emile also is known to have Knock Outpower so expect him and head coach Da Jumba to utilize that asset in this bout. Meanwhile are second Swede Mario Isaksson hails from Malmo and is a deadly Brown blet in BJJ. Isaksson will be making his Professional debut on Sunday's MILF 6 event. Mario trains under Shape Shifter who is well known for his Submission fighters, and at 205 he could be a Darkhorse in this division. vs Rock Steady (1-1-0) Derek Rodney (1-0-0) Two good wrestlers face off in are next fight, only one looks to be using his to avoid the ground game. Detroit fighter Rock Steady looked excellent in his QFC debut injuring his foe then showing no regards as his killer instinct kicked in for the finish, MILF loves these types. However, Rock struggled in his MILF debut as couldn't keep his opponent on the mat unfortunately. Steady has shown he is versatile though which if he and coach Stinky Leg can find that winning formula, he could stir up all kinds of problems for the rest of the field. Derek Rodney not to be confused with stable mate Rodney Derek is another one of the Peckham boys to invade the Island. Derek mixed his punches effectively in his debut fight on the QFC circuit, finishing the bout with a nasty right hand-uppercut combo. We got an exciting matchup for he and Manager Albert Summertop here as the fighters are very similar but very different if you will. vs Metyl Handz (1-0-0) Orville Dudpops (0-0-0) Two 18-year-old projects lock up for the 5th matchup at 205 and they look to be carbon cut outs of one another. Metyl Handz shut down his opponents' Takedown attempts for the most part in his debit at MILF prospects 3. The Toledo, Ohio native has an amateur background in boxing but is rapidly learning the rest of the traits involved in MMA. Metyl trains under Jake Kelley as they look to keep their winning ways going tomorrow night at MILF 5. He meets a fellow young'n out of Omaha, Nebraska with virtually the same skill set from the looks of it in the name of Orville Dudpops. Orville will be making his debut in this bout though, so nothing is sure about his style to be honest. Fighting out of the John Wolf he will meet his Br3thers ally in this showdown. vs Gabriel Mil (0-0-0) Jorma Saarinen (0-0-0) Debuts coming from both sides of the cages in this next fight, as Wrestler meets Muay Thai practitioner. Gabriel "$$$" Mil from the Bronx is a well-trained Wrestler. Covered from in tattoos from head to toe, Gabriel has the intimidation factor on lock now time to see what he can do in the cage. Representing Jersey Inc. expect "$$$" man to cash some checks and break some necks. We pay big bucks here at MILF. Jorma Saarinen calls Turku, Finland home where he has honed his Kick boxing skills. Jorma is over the 7-foot mark which should be helpful with keeping the distance I would assume. Herra Karva will follow his giant of a Light Heavyweight to the cage on fight night as we will see what his fighting style is all about real soon. vs Tug Violet (1-0-0) Deon Woods (1-0-0) More Strikers hit the MILF cage in are next bout both looking to stick to their winning ways. Tug Violet splits his time as the Lead Anchorman of the Channel 4 news team and MMA he also plays a mean jazz flute. Tugs debut was a ridiculous exhibition bout with his News team member and can't be taken seriously in no way. Tug does have a Muay Thai background and is none for his determination though as he looks to represent the Team Judas Group. Tampa, Florida brawler Deaon Woods on the other hand had a dominant pro debut finishing his fight with a crowd popping Spinning backfist KO. Woods has a Boxing base with good wrestling as well with his key attribute being his lethal fists. Another one of the Summertop coalition he will be looking to send the Channel news anchorman on an extended vacation at the local Island Hospital where I hear they do some Shaddy shit evolving the sailing of body parts. vs Pascal Popper (0-1-0) Zaid Owens (0-1-0) We stick to the Strikers (Possibly) in are next bout with two guys looking for their first win. Austian born Pascal Popper has a Wrestling base but is also versed in boxing. Another fighter whose debut was notably a 1 round exhibition, word on the street is popper packs a hell of a punch. Pascal will be heading to the cage alongside the squalliest of men in Squirrely Dan who has two MILF entrants this Island season. We have another 18-year-old up next by the name of Zaid Ownes and he also hails from the city of Toledo in Ohio of the United States. Primarily a boxer, in Ownes debut fight he seemed to want to take the fight to the ground a bit so we could very well see more of that gameplan. He will be representing Team Ragnar Ragnarson on fight night. vs Mitka Boycheck (0-1-0) Mr Pancit (0-1-0) Rounding out the field of 18 we have two guys coming off losses in their MMA debuts and are eager to get that big W! Mitka Boycheck is a Russian Boxer who found himself in slugfest in his debut at MILF Prospects 2. It wasn't the result he wanted but as they say what don't kill you only makes you Stranger. Mitka and his brother will be training under the experienced eye of Mit Dm this Island Season. Mr Pancit is a BJJ brown belt from Malmo, Sweden just like his training partner Mario. Pancit fell short in his pro debut which was coincidentally against the other Boycheck brother who submitted him with just two seconds left in the bout. A fight he was clearly winning to total heart break, but he showed he is legit expect coach Shape Shifter to shift game plan slightly.
  10. MILF Super Heavyweight League The Big boys may have gotten off before my slack ass could get a preview in but have no fear Mr Madness is here! Everyone loves the Beastly brute strength of those big burley 265+ fighters typically because their fights tend to end early and in brutal fashion. Today We will look at the now 12 strong Super heavyweight Division including two fights that took place on Yesterday's event in review. vs Tristan Sandoval (2-1-0) Uche Igwe (1-1-0) Just to throw a wrench in my sentiments about the Super heavyweights Sandoval vs Igwe indeed went the distance. The fight started as one would think with both fighters engaging with punches in bunches. Sandoval was clearly the more precise striker though while Igwe was looking for a quick KO. Uche landed probably the most significant strike in the bout as he connected with a perfectly timed Right Hand that dropped Tristan just under the minute mark in round 1. Sandoval capitalized on Igwe's failure to finish though and got right back to business ending the round on top. Accuracy was indeed the Key to the Victory as Sandoval mixed his Head and Body punches for a 93% ratio as well mixing in a few Combos. Igwe on the other hand looked very sloppy and will need to step up his game. He had a 5 second KO in his debut but your in the big leagues now Skippy! Sandoval def. Igwe by Unanimous Decision vs Scooter McGraw (1-2-0) Enzo DiMaggio (1-1-0) Are next fight played out just how those 700 Island Natives would have liked as they found themselves on the edge of their seats in joy while the blood flowed. Both DiMaggio and McGraw drew blood from their foe early in the bout as Enzo looked to be the aggressor of the Contest. If we learned anything from these first two fights at Super Heavy it's that Going in there like a Mad man does not always pay off. Enzo managed to only land 2 out of 14 shots as he went head hunting early. He found himself ducking and weaving around the 45 second mark and then managed to duck himself into an Uppercut from Hell which landed him into the nether realm for a bit while McGraw humbly gave him a reach around while he laid unconscious. McGraw def. DiMaggio by KO (Punch) 0.51 Round 1 vs Khamzat Aliyev (2-0-0) Kristopher Marks (1-0-0) "Grappler meets Striker" and "Someone's 0 must go" two very played out lines but I'm running with them anyway. Khamzat "Big G" Aliyev is a star wrestler from Baku, Azerbaijan who has shown his determination through his first two Island fights so far. Alyiev's relentless takedowns and Ground control have been a huge part of his dominance. His most recent victory was at MILF Prospects 2 winning a Unanimous Decision, he will be cornered by Aleksandar Dobrosavljevic. Kristopher Marks of Trinadad City, Trinadad is an Muay Thai Specialist who made is his Island Debut in Violent Fashion. Marks took out his foe with a Nasty Right hand which he followed up with more powerful shots until the ref pulled him away. Kristopher will be followed to cage side by his coach Michael Lewis in what should be an interesting contest. vs Xavierntreal Couture (1-0-0) Stefan Schilt (1-0-0) Two KO artist meet in are 4th battle of the big men, as both will be looking to flatten their next victim. Xavierntreal Couture from Montreal, Quebec, Canada made a successful QFC debut winning via One Punch KO at the 2-minute mark. Couture has trained in both Muay Thai and Wrestling quite a bit in preparation to this Island Season. The second member of the Ice Cold Fight Team alongside his Family member Raphael. Stefan Schilt is your Typical Dutch Striker with a background in Kickboxing fighting out of Amsterdam, Netherlands. Schilt was landing at will in his impressive debut carving up his opponent with Razor sharp strikes, ending the contest in less than two minutes. Fellow Dutchmen Dirk Deadly will accompany his young pupil in his MILF debut. vs Semi Veainu (0-0-0) Domingo Don Dominguez (0-1-0) Boxing vs Muay Thai is up next as both fighters are seeking their first win on the Island. Semi Veainu from the famed Veainu Family looks to follow in his Tongan brethren's footsteps this year on the Island. Semi has yet to fight in the MMA cage but with the Veainu name expect a Studd, he is known to have a background in boxing and Goat tossing. A member of the Alfred Winterbottom he will join one other brother in the MILF org for 2024. Domingo "Triple D" Don Dominguez fights out of Porto, Portugal comes in 0-1 after a disappointing KO loss in his QFC debut. Known to have a Chin made of Granite it looked more like Drywall in his debut as it was shattered in just 27 seconds. Furious Tyson will be in his corner come fight night as the duo look to avoid the same result. vs Zare Loki (1-0-0) Freaky Craig (0-1-0) Are final battle at Super Heavyweight will between are two most recent adds to the division who have started their careers going in opposite directions. Zare Loki of Harare, DR Congo has a strong background in Boxing which he utilized excellently in his QFC debut. Loki was 7/7 on Punches and needed just a minute and 13 seconds to finish the Jelly belly in his debut. Zare comes to us from the Macious Smith fight Team who will represent three MILF competitors. Freaky Craig from the Palestinian State has gotten himself off to a rough start unfortunately. The Muay Thai Practitioner got caught early with a Left Hook that dropped him and looked like a fish out of water on the ground where he found himself tapping out to a Kimura. He is known to have Heavy Hands so expect Coach Freaky Phantom to utilize them more in his next fight.
  11. Well there we have it, to resolve this issue I guess someone needs to remind him a 3rd time. or 4th or 5th maybe who knows.
  12. MILF Welterweight Point Standings 1. Valentino Andolini 6 Points 1. Aden Parker 6 Points 1. Jardani Jovonovich 6 Points 1. Roman Vitali 6 Points 1. Nate Robinson 6 Points 1. Raphael Couture 6 Points 7. Autio Saari 5 Points 8. Deveon Zelda 3 Points 9. Elix Juarez 0 Points 9. Jukka Raikkonen 0 Points 9. Faarooq Rahim 0 Points 9. Justin Russell 0 Points 9. Grayson Velazquez 0 Points 9. Warrick Cager 0 Points 9. JJ Antonio Ferriera 0 Points 9. Tommy Chong Jr 0 Points Yet to Fight Graeme Morgan, Pekka Kokko, True Religion, Arturo Lowery, Mario Waters
  13. Lot of close Decisions as usual. I need more violent Knock outs UFC! get it together!!!
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