Guest Posted April 24, 2012 Report Share Posted April 24, 2012 *In today's press conference Dalston Marley tossed a medical kit to Luca Ursini, and suggested he make sure his health insurance is paid up. Dalston then stood on the table and peed on him, lit up a blunt, and walked out the front door.* Classy fighter Sperling was so ho hum when sent the Vossier Azelas fight offer all he could muster was a runny dump which he dipped a feather in, and signed the contract with his own dookie. It should be noted Sperling hasn't been handling his recent losses well, and has fallen back into his habit of ingesting massive quantities of cocaine and booze then finishing his night off trying to have anal sex with a cheap whore only to find out the drugs/booze has rendered his cock useless. Of course he's to much of a man to accept the blame for his flaccid penis so he immediately blames the whore, and this usually ends badly for her as he takes out his anger on them by beating them to within an inch of their lives. That, however, makes him feel more like man which gets him hard so he then has his way with the bloody mess of a woman. The moral of the story is Sperling Windsor is fucked up beyond belief, and is currently on an epic downward spiral! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Face Kicker Posted April 24, 2012 Report Share Posted April 24, 2012 yeah it's been difficult to manage dalston, as it sounds like sperling has been as well. all we, as managers, can do is to make sure they show up on time, on weight, and keep a few lawyers on retainer to deal with the fallout. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kronix Posted April 25, 2012 Report Share Posted April 25, 2012 Question, FOTN & KOTN. Has there been any awards? i cant see any one the events Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 25, 2012 Report Share Posted April 25, 2012 It's done weekly across all of them. Not on a per event basis. Though I could start doing it per event as well if people want me to! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grasman Posted April 25, 2012 Report Share Posted April 25, 2012 MMA daily reports. During the magnificent League of Leagues MMA tournament in Los Angeles, California, one of the contestants got injured, injured BAD. On his way into the cage, Uriel Sheet was sexually attacked by a crazed fan, the Just Bleed guy! This attention craving lunatic had just escaped from prison and had decided to step it up a notch. Unknown to and out of reach of the tv cameras, the lunatuc had managed to get in under Uriel's MT cup, and somehow managed to cut a hole in his ballsac. Screaming out in pain, at very high octanes, Uriel was unaware the lunatic had left a small quantity of Peruvian flakes, in and around the ballsac wound. Now Imagine that scenario, Uriel standing there howling with his right testicle hanging out of the sac, covered in top notch cocaine. Reflecting on the incident, Uriel Said; "Suddenly there was no more pain and i was filled with explosive energy". "I saw security lead someone away and from that point the only thought that entered my mind was to DESTROY Jaxon Halo". Unfortunately for Mr. Sheet, he hammered his hands on Jaxons face so hard, he came out of the fight with multiple fractures to the carpus, metacarpus and phalanges, in BOTH his hands. "I felt absolutely nothing", Uriel said, "it was literally like punching into a bag of wheat, but fuck did it hurt the day after." Today, less than a week after the fight, having been rushed into emergency surgery, his coke burned right testicle amputated and pumped full of pain relief, he says he is already training hard for his upcoming fight tomorrow, against a Murder Case motherfucker in top physical condition. He has no clue how whe is going to win this fight with his two badly broken hands and single testicle, but what he does know, is that he is going to show up and fucking try! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Face Kicker Posted April 25, 2012 Report Share Posted April 25, 2012 Today, less than a week after the fight, having been rushed into emergency surgery, his coke burned right testicle amputated and pumped full of pain relief, he says he is already training hard for his upcoming fight tomorrow, against a Murder Case motherfucker in top physical condition. if he has injuries to his genitals he should really be training while soft, not while hard. it should help with the healing process. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 25, 2012 Report Share Posted April 25, 2012 if he has injuries to his genitals he should really be training while soft, not while hard. it should help with the healing process. You can't argue with logic like this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 26, 2012 Report Share Posted April 26, 2012 Everyone point your finger at JBomb and laugh I hope I get Helix next and his crap chin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeadlyDirk Posted April 26, 2012 Report Share Posted April 26, 2012 Well that's 4 wins and 4 knockouts for Mitch , bring on next weeks so called competition. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
j666 Posted April 26, 2012 Report Share Posted April 26, 2012 *sighs in disgust* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 26, 2012 Report Share Posted April 26, 2012 Early candidate for upset of the tournament? Maybe! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Showdown Posted April 26, 2012 Report Share Posted April 26, 2012 Shiv, I don't know if you just never check your in-game mail, or if you didn't like the design, but my brother sent you a League of Leagues logo that can be used on the main org pages and the fighter pages. I also sent you a message about it. If you don't like the design, it's not a big deal. But a response would have been appreciated. If you just don't check your mail much (like another certain someone in this tournament who knows who he is), then I understand. If you just ignore me like a douche, then I must your brain. In all seriousness, we're good. I just hate that picture of nothing that's up there right now, and I'm going to harass the shit out of you until you change it to something that either says LoL or League of Leagues. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grasman Posted April 26, 2012 Report Share Posted April 26, 2012 if he has injuries to his genitals he should really be training while soft, not while hard. it should help with the healing process. The soft bits of Sheet, are always hard! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grasman Posted April 26, 2012 Report Share Posted April 26, 2012 Uriel refused to have any titanium rods to hold his bones together,, thats way to light. Instead,he contacted his father in Nuuk Greenland, who heads the local secret nuclear program, and had him send over some "stuff" Yes my boys and girls, Uriel got his fingers into some nuclear waste..... it's DU baby, one of the heaviest metals known to man, it really is the shit!!! Sure, the Depleted Uranium will completely fuck Uriel Sheet up within a year, but he suspects that few, if any of his fellow fighters, will survive the brutality of the LoL tournament anyway, so he plans to go out in heavy handed style. Murder Case, you'll need to be careful, or you'll end up as one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 26, 2012 Report Share Posted April 26, 2012 Ethan I saw it on my phone... It seems my drunken state completely forgot about it! I'll get it up tonight! My bad! (I'll give you candy!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
j666 Posted April 26, 2012 Report Share Posted April 26, 2012 Ethan I saw it on my phone... It seems my drunken state completely forgot about it! I'll get it up tonight! My bad! (I'll give you candy!) look out ethan! loooool Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 26, 2012 Report Share Posted April 26, 2012 7 day injury. Fight is in 6 days. My group should be breathing a sigh of relief that Deng gets injury time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 27, 2012 Report Share Posted April 27, 2012 Well, shit. Hokey Smeinen lost his first fight. Props to Zapputo and his manager. Click here to see the 30-26 beatdown: http://mmatycoon.com...php?FTID=431473 I'm happy that he has a hell of a chin, though. He took so many shots and didn't even get rocked. Remember, the $10,000 Impossible Award is still open! The first person to beat Hokey via a non-cut TKO will win the award. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DaBest Posted April 27, 2012 Report Share Posted April 27, 2012 Ethan I saw it on my phone... It seems my drunken state completely forgot about it! I'll get it up tonight! My bad! (I'll give you candy!) look out ethan! loooool If the candy doesn't work he'll just bring the van without windows to pick you up! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kronix Posted April 27, 2012 Report Share Posted April 27, 2012 I feel a great beating is about to come. Maybe Brian Sackett needs to call in a sick day cuz he knows his day is about to get a lot worse! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
potter09 Posted April 27, 2012 Report Share Posted April 27, 2012 Possibly upset of the tourney so far jaxo halo upsetting palmee sackett a stable mate. Alliance companion still feel sackett will win the whole thing tho Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 27, 2012 Report Share Posted April 27, 2012 Big upsets this week with Helix, Sackett and Hokey all losing. Wow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeadlyDirk Posted April 27, 2012 Report Share Posted April 27, 2012 Big upsets this week with Helix, Sackett and Hokey all losing. Wow. They're all bums, Mitch would have knocked them all out Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duxwig Posted April 27, 2012 Report Share Posted April 27, 2012 Big upsets this week with Helix, Sackett and Hokey all losing. Wow. Chan will lose this week guarantee since he have 10 day injure in fight. He give opponent win since he need it. He charity like that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shortfuse122829 Posted April 27, 2012 Report Share Posted April 27, 2012 Brian Crawford's manager will pay $10,000 to the first guy who makes it out of the first round with that monster. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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