Alfred Posted December 3, 2023 Author Report Share Posted December 3, 2023 Christmas Day Massacre - Day 2 Second day of fights shines a light on a few early contenders. Anwar Hussin's pitty patty gnp wrestling has won him a couple of fights though he looks pretty knackered now going into his next fight. Scumbag buttflopper Bernardo Cabral on the other hand looks fresh as a daisy. Hopefully someone smacks him in the chops real soon. The worlds hardest torso, Mr Torso has also managed to go 2-0 with another first round KO victory and stands amongst the top guys as well Mateusz Kieliszkowski who made waxy balls Jersey Turnpike look like a chump in their match up. On the opposite end of things we have the likes of River Waters who has already racked up a total of 18 injury days as well as Stanley Reynolds, Freaky Fister and Jokubas Antukis. These losers all share the bottom spot with records of 0-2. No one cares about the 1-1 guys right now. 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alfred Posted December 3, 2023 Author Report Share Posted December 3, 2023 River Waters (Thomas Edwards) = 8 Inj (Total =18 Inj) Anwar Hussin (Crazy Horse) = 4 Inj / 2 Cut (Total = 10 Inj / 6 Cut) Freaky Fister (Freaky Phantom) = 6 Inj (Total = 14 Inj) Santino Oliviera (Todd Westacott) = 3 Inj / 8 Cut (Total = 5 Inj / 8 Cut) Mauricio Nunes (Rodrigo Ferriera) = 3 Inj / 1 Cut (Total = 8 Inj / 4 Cut) Tarquin Doomwood (Bob Slay) = 3 Inj (Total = 8 Inj) Stanley Reynolds (Scottie 2 Hottie) = 3 Inj (Total = 8 Inj) Gordon Hunter (Rei) = 1 Inj (Total = 4 Inj / 2 Cut) Jersey Turnpike (Rush Greyson) = 2 Inj (Total = 6 Inj) Daroshev Faroshev (Johnny The Gunt) = 2 Inj (Total = 6 Inj) Mateusz Kieliszkowski (McChicken Sandwich) = 2 Inj (Total = 6 Inj) Mr Torso (Tycoon Judas) = 4 Inj (Total = 6 Inj) Paul Nichols (Alfred Winterbottom) = 1 Inj (Total = 4 Inj) Sean Faolin (Jimmy Normal) = 4 Inj (Total = 4 Inj) Bernardo Cabral (John Pezao) = FRESH (Total = FRESH) Jokubas Antukis (Jersey Inc.) = FRESH (Total = FRESH) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daudy Posted December 3, 2023 Report Share Posted December 3, 2023 lmao this moves so quickly, I didn't even realise I had fought again! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rei Posted December 4, 2023 Report Share Posted December 4, 2023 6 hours ago, Alfred said: No one cares about the 1-1 guys right now. bastid Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flipper Posted December 4, 2023 Report Share Posted December 4, 2023 7 hours ago, Alfred said: who wouldn’t stop humping waxy balls Jersey Turnpike, who strategically tapped out to save energy for fights that actually mattered. And I’d like to point out that JT came into that fight with 2 injury days and as of today he’s completely recovered. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alfred Posted December 4, 2023 Author Report Share Posted December 4, 2023 6 hours ago, Flipper said: And I’d like to point out that JT came into that fight with 2 injury days and as of today he’s completely recovered. He actually came out of that fight with 2 days injury too and now he is magically healed. There's some shamanistic voodoo shenanigans going on here. A couple of other fighters body seemed to have taken two days injury as 1 also. Going to be some heavy use of asterisks by the end of this Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skuzbukit Posted December 5, 2023 Report Share Posted December 5, 2023 Blood for the Blood Gods! 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BenhornbyMMA Posted December 5, 2023 Report Share Posted December 5, 2023 Someones O has to go! - Mateusz Kieliszkowski 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alfred Posted December 5, 2023 Author Report Share Posted December 5, 2023 Christmas Day Massacre - Day 3 Some severely battered and bruised bro’s nursing their wounds right now and we’re only three events in. 10 more to go! Only two Hammersmith hardmen left undefeated and that’s Anwar Hussin and Mateusz Kieliszkowski. They’ll face each other in the next round leaving only one! On the opposite end of that, the two fellas yet to pick up a win will also face each other. River Waters will face Freaky Fister in a battle of the bottoms! Ol’ Waxen Balls Jersey Turnpike had a hell of a scrap against Paul Nichols but traded a good few brain cells for the KO win. Gordon Hunter put everyone to sleep in his snoozefest against Santino Oliviera but most importantly he got the win and is now on a two fight win streak and up into 4th place in the table. Both Mr. Torso and Bernardo Cabral suffered their first loss of the tournament and now sit among the 2-1 crew. No one else deserves a mention right now beside perhaps the Ironman Jokubas Antukis who despite having a 1-2 record has yet to suffer even one cut or injury! Medical science might want to keep an eye on this man 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jersey Posted December 5, 2023 Report Share Posted December 5, 2023 1 minute ago, Alfred said: Christmas Day Massacre - Day 3 Some severely battered and bruised bro’s nursing their wounds right now and we’re only three events in. 10 more to go! Only two Hammersmith hardmen left undefeated and that’s Anwar Hussin and Mateusz Kieliszkowski. They’ll face each other in the next round leaving only one! On the opposite end of that, the two fellas yet to pick up a win will also face each other. River Waters will face Freaky Fister in a battle of the bottoms! Ol’ Waxen Balls Jersey Turnpike had a hell of a scrap against Paul Nichols but traded a good few brain cells for the KO win. Gordon Hunter put everyone to sleep in his snoozefest against Santino Oliviera but most importantly he got the win and is now on a two fight win streak and up into 4th place in the table. Both Mr. Torso and Bernardo Cabral suffered their first loss of the tournament and now sit among the 2-1 crew. No one else deserves a mention right now beside perhaps the Ironman Jokubas Antukis who despite having a 1-2 record has yet to suffer even one cut or injury! Medical science might want to keep an eye on this man Jokubas Antukis Quote I am Terminator. I am coming for all of you. You can not hurt me. I am just getting started. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alfred Posted December 5, 2023 Author Report Share Posted December 5, 2023 [#1] River Waters (Thomas Edwards) = 6 Inj (Total = 24 Inj) [#2] Jersey Turnpike (Rush Greyson) = 16 Inj (Total = 22 Inj) ▲ 7 [3#] Anwar Hussin (Crazy Horse) = 2 Inj / 2 Cut (Total = 12 Inj / 8 Cut) ▼ 1 [#4] Freaky Fister (Freaky Phantom) = 4 Inj (Total = 18 Inj) ▼ 1 [#5] Santino Oliviera (Todd Westacott) = 1 Inj / 3 Cut (Total = 6 Inj / 11 Cut) ▼ 1 [#6] Mauricio Nunes (Rodrigo Ferriera) = 3 Inj (Total = 11 Inj / 4 Cut) ▼ 1 [#7] Paul Nichols (Alfred Winterbottom) = 7 Inj (Total = 11 Inj) ▲ 6 [#8] Tarquin Doomwood (Bob Slay) = 2 Inj / 1 Cut (Total = 10 Inj / 1 Cut) ▼ 2 [#9] Daroshev Faroshev (Johnny The Gunt) = 4 Inj (Total = 10 Inj) ▲ 1 [#10] Stanley Reynolds (Scottie 2 Hottie) = 1 Inj (Total = 9 Inj) ▼ 3 [#11] Mateusz Kieliszkowski (McChicken Sandwich) = 2 Inj (Total = 8 Inj) [#12] Mr Torso (Tycoon Judas) = 2 Inj (Total = 8 Inj) [#13] Sean Faolin (Jimmy Normal) = 2 Inj / 2 Cut (Total = 6 Inj / 2 Cut) ▲ 1 [#14] Gordon Hunter (Rei) = FRESH (Total = 4 Inj / 2 Cut) ▼ 6 [#15] Bernardo Cabral (John Pezao) = 4 Inj (Total = 4 Inj) [#16] Jokubas Antukis (Jersey Inc.) = FRESH (Total = FRESH) 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daudy Posted December 6, 2023 Report Share Posted December 6, 2023 Poor ol' Hussin running on fumes these days. Why don't his opponents just roll over and tap out? Save us both some energy. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alfred Posted December 6, 2023 Author Report Share Posted December 6, 2023 End of Day 3 Day 4 Fights 3 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skuzbukit Posted December 7, 2023 Report Share Posted December 7, 2023 Tarquin "The Tyrant" Doomwood (399885) Jersey Turnpike's Injury-load made him a sitting-duck, I may be gassed out, god what I wouldn't give for a can of Monster right now, but the Blood-Gods didn't get a lick of blood from this bout. Poor old Jersey swang 1 punch & that missed so I thought I would give him a nice tap or nap option instead of continuing to beat his face in, see I'm not a bad guy really! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alfred Posted December 7, 2023 Author Report Share Posted December 7, 2023 Christmas Day Massacre - Day 4 Well, only one man stands undefeated now and that is Anwar Hussin managed by the one and only Crazy Horse aka El Caballo Loco. Ol' CH is really emerging as a MASTER of his craft and a real LEADER of men. Now with that said, I'm attaching a little bounty to that bullseye on his back. I'll set it at 250k for someone to wipe the smug smirk of his face Whilst we're on the subject of bounties, 250k for the first person to bust up Mr. Invincible Jokubas Antukis. Cut or injured I don't care. I just want to see that bastard suffer. It's still pretty early days with another 9 rounds of mayhem to go but apparently in a swiss system you never face the same opponent twice so I do wonder who is going to step up and kick Hussin's ass after Mateusz Kieliszkowski failed to do so. 3-1 Bernardo Cabral will have the next crack at that whilst Kieliszkowski and Gordon Hunter will face each other and aim to keep pace with the league leader. Tarquin Doomwood had a nice win over Jersey Turnpike to go 3-1 and move up to #5 and in the table while Turnpike drops to 2-2 and becomes the most brutalised man in the tournament so far. After that a bunch of 2-2 scrubs that can't decide whether they're any good or not and then the 1-3 bums who very likely aren't going to be any good. Then you have River Waters right at the bottom of the table at 0-4. See you in 2 days! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alfred Posted December 7, 2023 Author Report Share Posted December 7, 2023 [#1] Jersey Turnpike (Rush Greyson) = 14 Inj (Total = 36 Inj) ▲ 1 [#2] River Waters (Thomas Edwards) = 4 Inj (Total = 28 Inj) ▼ 1 [#3] Anwar Hussin (Crazy Horse) = 3 Inj (Total = 15 Inj / 8 Cut) [#4] Freaky Fister (Freaky Phantom) = 2 Inj (Total = 20 Inj) [#5] Santino Oliviera (Todd Westacott) = FRESH (Total = 6 Inj / 11 Cut) [#6] Mauricio Nunes (Rodrigo Ferriera) = 2 Inj (Total = 13 Inj / 4 Cut) [#7] Paul Nichols (Alfred Winterbottom) = 5 Inj (Total = 16 Inj) [#8] Tarquin Doomwood (Bob Slay) = 2 Inj (Total = 12 Inj / 1 Cut) [#9] Daroshev Faroshev (Johnny The Gunt) = 2 Inj (Total = 12 Inj) [#10] Mateusz Kieliszkowski (McChicken Sandwich) = 3 Inj (Total = 11 Inj) ▲ 1 [#11] Sean Faolin (Jimmy Normal) = 3 Inj (Total = 9 Inj / 2 Cut) ▲ 2 [#12] Mr Torso (Tycoon Judas) = 2 Inj (Total = 10 Inj) [#13] Stanley Reynolds (Scottie 2 Hottie) = FRESH (Total = 9 Inj) ▼ 3 [#14] Gordon Hunter (Rei) = FRESH (Total = 4 Inj / 2 Cut) [#15] Bernardo Cabral (John Pezao) = 2 Inj (Total = 6 Inj) [#16] Jokubas Antukis (Jersey Inc.) = FRESH (Total = FRESH) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daudy Posted December 7, 2023 Report Share Posted December 7, 2023 Imagine entering a tournament, with a physique hand crafted by the gods themselves. You're representing an entire nation that doesn't get represented that much, and are now the most hyped athlete in the tycoon world from that nation. You have a skill set, a manager who sometimes knows what he's doing, and you execute your plan flawlessly now for four whole rounds of this grueling tournament. Undefeated, undisputed, also really handsome. The tournament organiser, furious at your manager for losing the final of a grappling tournament and costing the alliance $25M*, now takes it out on you and puts a bounty on your head for being too good, too successful and too good looking. Imagine all that, and you still hit as hard as an emancipated cancer patient. Jeezus. Absolutely dominating opponents only to not even scratch them and having to waste a whole 15 minutes every round, handicapping himself for the next fight because he's spent all that energy. Hussin's opponents should tap out ASAP to his pillow fisted gnp. You're still not going to win, and draining his energy is only going to help your opponents which he has to face in the future. Yes, that's right, you should tap out early if you face Hussin, to screw the rest of the tournament bracket. 4D Chess, think about it. This is objective analysis. *Hussin officially protests this, because the powers that be could have tried to make the final themselves to win the money back, but nooooo. Always relying on foreigners to do their dirty work and then blaming them after! 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jersey Posted December 8, 2023 Report Share Posted December 8, 2023 3 hours ago, Daudy said: Imagine entering a tournament, with a physique hand crafted by the gods themselves. You're representing an entire nation that doesn't get represented that much, and are now the most hyped athlete in the tycoon world from that nation. You have a skill set, a manager who sometimes knows what he's doing, and you execute your plan flawlessly now for four whole rounds of this grueling tournament. Undefeated, undisputed, also really handsome. The tournament organiser, furious at your manager for losing the final of a grappling tournament and costing the alliance $25M*, now takes it out on you and puts a bounty on your head for being too good, too successful and too good looking. Imagine all that, and you still hit as hard as an emancipated cancer patient. Jeezus. Absolutely dominating opponents only to not even scratch them and having to waste a whole 15 minutes every round, handicapping himself for the next fight because he's spent all that energy. Hussin's opponents should tap out ASAP to his pillow fisted gnp. You're still not going to win, and draining his energy is only going to help your opponents which he has to face in the future. Yes, that's right, you should tap out early if you face Hussin, to screw the rest of the tournament bracket. 4D Chess, think about it. This is objective analysis. *Hussin officially protests this, because the powers that be could have tried to make the final themselves to win the money back, but nooooo. Always relying on foreigners to do their dirty work and then blaming them after! Jokubas Antukis "This is very smart strategy. I watch many many Art Jimmerson grappling DVD's in to prepare for this tournament, and Master Jimmerson lay out great strategy for this. There are many ways. The 'confusing tap', the 'dead fish', the dreaded 'worm having many strokes'... Nobody like to hang out on ground. I am here to hurt people faces. If you take me to ground, you girl-man. I am The Terminator, I want your head." 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alfred Posted December 9, 2023 Author Report Share Posted December 9, 2023 Christmas Day Massacre - Day 5 Well, well, well. Looks like things are starting to get interesting! Undefeated Anwar Hussin suffered his first loss of the tournament and conceded the top of the table to his opponent Bernardo Cabral. Rumours swirling however that Hussin took a tactical dive in order to preserve energy and mitigate the risk of injury and cut. No way of proving this right now but if it's true, it could end up being one costly gamble. Gordon Hunter continues his surge up the table with another solid victory, this time over recent frontrunner Mateusz Kieliszkowski. Hunter moves to #3 in the table whilst Kieliszkowski drops down to #6. The man with the skin of an crocodile Jokubas Antukis also seems to have put his early slump behind him and is now on a three fight win streak. He moves up to #7 in the table and emerges as an outside threat. At the bottom of the table River Waters still searches for his first win of the tournament after losing to Paul Nichols and Stanley Reynolds and Mauricio Nunes have yet to get going with their 1-4 records. 250k is awarded to Bernardo Cabral for handing Anwar Hussin his first loss but the bounty on Jokumas Antukis still remains after Daroshev Faroshev failed to claim it. The powers that be have now decided to increase that bounty to 300k for the next round. TTFN. Let's do this again in 2 days time! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alfred Posted December 9, 2023 Author Report Share Posted December 9, 2023 [#1] Jersey Turnpike (Rush Greyson) = 12 Inj (Total = 48 Inj) [#2] River Waters (Thomas Edwards) = 2 Inj (Total = 30 Inj) [#3] Sean Faolin (Jimmy Normal) = 16 Inj (Total = 25 Inj / 2 Cut) ▲ 8 [#4] Anwar Hussin (Crazy Horse) = FRESH (Total = 15 Inj / 8 Cut) ▼ 1 [#5] Freaky Fister (Freaky Phantom) = 3 Inj (Total = 23 Inj) ▼ 1 [#6] Mauricio Nunes (Rodrigo Ferreira) = 5 Inj (Total = 18 Inj / 4 Cut) [#7] Tarquin Doomwood (Bob Slay) = 4 Inj / 3 Cuts (Total = 16 Inj / 4 Cut) ▲ 1 [#8] Daroshev Faroshev (Johnny The Gunt) = 5 Inj / 3 Cuts (Total = 17 Inj / 3 Cut) ▲ 1 [#9] Paul Nichols (Alfred Winterbottom) = 3 Inj (Total = 19 Inj) -2 [#10] Santino Oliveira (Todd Westacott) = FRESH (Total = 6 Inj / 11 Cut) ▼ 5 [#11] Stanley Reynolds (Scottie 2 Hottie) = 5 Inj (Total = 14 Inj) ▲ 1 [#12] Mateusz Kieliszkowski (McChicken Sandwich) = 1 Inj (Total = 12 Inj) ▼ 2 [#13] Mr Torso (Tycoon Judas) = 2 Inj (Total = 12 Inj) ▼ 1 [#14] Gordon Hunter (Rei) = FRESH (Total = 4 Inj / 2 Cut) [#15] Bernardo Cabral (John Pezao) = FRESH (Total = 6 Inj) [#16] Jokubas Antukis (Jersey Inc.) = FRESH (Total = FRESH) 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alfred Posted December 9, 2023 Author Report Share Posted December 9, 2023 End of Day 5 Day 6 Fights 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carciofi Posted December 10, 2023 Report Share Posted December 10, 2023 16 day injury (is that new?) and zero in the gas tank. Now I gotta fight that ankle biter Torso. Are soccer kicks allowed in this thing? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skuzbukit Posted December 10, 2023 Report Share Posted December 10, 2023 12 hours ago, Carciofi said: 16 day injury (is that new?) and zero in the gas tank. Now I gotta fight that ankle biter Torso. Are soccer kicks allowed in this thing? Dude has lethal punches as my boy Tarquin dicovered to his cost, 100% of his training goes on his hands so I hope your kid's grappling is both good & very fast. Soccer kicks should be a given, he hasn't got any knees to be grounded. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The1rstSaint Posted December 11, 2023 Report Share Posted December 11, 2023 On 12/9/2023 at 7:14 PM, Carciofi said: 16 day injury (is that new?) and zero in the gas tank. Now I gotta fight that ankle biter Torso. Are soccer kicks allowed in this thing? For the mufugging record I am a 7'2 inch Torso! And I am now the toughest guy in Letterkenny! Hope everyone's training is going great, im going to try to get me a sesh in tomorrow, before the Massacre continues Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carciofi Posted December 12, 2023 Report Share Posted December 12, 2023 3 hours ago, The1rstSaint said: For the mufugging record I am a 7'2 inch Torso! And I am now the toughest guy in Letterkenny! Hope everyone's training is going great, im going to try to get me a sesh in tomorrow, before the Massacre continues Can confirm. Mr. Torso is half man, half amazing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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