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Christmas Day Massacre


Alfred

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1 hour ago, The1rstSaint said:

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           Mr Torso

"I feel I'm being discriminated against because of my disabilities. Won't let me fight because of the scales lying, I am clearly a clean cut 170 pounds I just can't stand on the scales properly to get an accurate weight! Give me my damn contract PUSSIES!!!!"

he's only four pounds over, should be allowed to compete tbh. We need to give our disabled black athletes a fair shake.

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13 hours ago, The1rstSaint said:

16717191041836.jpg

           Mr Torso

"I feel I'm being discriminated against because of my disabilities. Won't let me fight because of the scales lying, I am clearly a clean cut 170 pounds I just can't stand on the scales properly to get an accurate weight! Give me my damn contract PUSSIES!!!!"

Get in the sauna fatty, professionals make weight.

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15 hours ago, The1rstSaint said:

16717191041836.jpg

           Mr Torso

"I feel I'm being discriminated against because of my disabilities. Won't let me fight because of the scales lying, I am clearly a clean cut 170 pounds I just can't stand on the scales properly to get an accurate weight! Give me my damn contract PUSSIES!!!!"

Bit spaced lately, but I just realized wtf is going here 😂

 

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Jersey Turnpike "Exit 12"
IMG_0093.jpg?ex=6575d29a&is=65635d9a&hm=

Guido manlet born in the suburbs of the ‘Garden State.’ While wandering around backstage during a KT event, blackout drunk, he was pushed into the ring with gloves strapped to his hands where he assumed he was in a bar fight and cold-clocked the other guy. The following afternoon, he awoke in a puddle of his own piss and vomit next to a copy of a Grouch FC contract with his signature on it. Professional meatball hunter and grenade jumper.

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Jersey Turnpike "Exit 12"

IMG_0093.jpg?ex=6575d29a&is=65635d9a&hm=

CDM Record : 1-0-0

‘I always told ma’ these knucks would get me outta the suburbs streets and now I’ma prove me right.’


Yo, so this freaky dolphin guy tells me that if I keep knockin’ dudes out he’ll give me a lifetime supply of Gym-Tan-Laundry. I gotta say that’s a helluva deal considering the first guy only lasted 16 seconds. That’s like a rate of 300 GTLs per second with a derivative of 33.3 GTLs repeatin.’

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Christmas Day Massacre - Day 1

Too early to come to too many conclusions about the who’s who of the tournament but there’s definitely some fella’s you wouldn’t want to spill their pint in a crowded pub. 

Jersey Turnpike might be a double hard bastard even though he looks like a bro who waxes his balls. He battered some butt flopping BJJ brown belt who tried to throw a punch in just sixteen seconds. 

Mr. Torso also looks like one tough stump. 170Lbs of pure torso and arms, it’s no wonder he was able to get the quick KO win over Gordon Hunter in just thirteen seconds. 

Three fighters managed to come through the round unscathed. Bernardo Cabral who butt flopped over his opponent Sean Faolin suffered no cuts or injuries but then again neither did his opponent who will at least have that to be happy about. The other lucky bastard to suffer no ill was Lithuanian mad man Jokubus Antukis. He may have lost the bout but at least he managed to give his opponent Santino Oliviera a little gift from their encounter. A nice two day cut for him to take into his next fight.

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brutality.jpg

River Waters (Thomas Edwards) = 10 Inj
Anwar Hussin (Crazy Horse) = 6 Inj / 4 Cut
Freaky Fister (Freaky Phantom) = 8 Inj
Mauricio Nunes (Rodrigo Ferriera) = 5 Inj / 3 Cut
Tarquin Doomwood (Bob Slay) = 5 Inj
Stanley Reynolds (Scottie 2 Hottie) = 5 Inj
Gordon Hunter (Rei) = 3 Inj / 2 Cut
Jersey Turnpike (Rush Greyson) = 4 Inj
Daroshev Faroshev (Johnny The Gunt) = 4 Inj
Mateusz Kieliszkowski (McChicken Sandwich) = 4 Inj
Paul Nichols (Alfred Winterbottom) = 3 Inj
Santino Oliviera (Todd Westacott) = 2 Cut
Mr Torso (Tycoon Judas) = 2 Inj
Bernardo Cabral (John Pezao) = FRESH
Sean Faolin (Jimmy Normal) = FRESH
Jokubas Antukis (Jersey Inc.) = FRESH

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